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A Not so Super Hero

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Submitted By iamcrowee
Words 2426
Pages 10
hey. It's just me, your friendly neighborhood spiderman. charot. okay so I'm a superhero! or maybe not much of a SUPER hero. just a simple one. though I can't really explain how so 'simple' and so not I am as being a SUPER hero. as the world moves fast around me, I can slowly see each and every one of their faces as they walk pass by. worried, stressed, sad. even if they plaster a big smile on, it doesn't work. I can see through it. I can feel it, I can see what hides underneath it. what's really going on or what had happened for them to answer me how they're so perfectly fine when I ask them If they are.

weird power right?

mahirap. pero I take full responsibilty.

hindi man nila aminin. hindi ko man sila kilala ng napakatagal. pero malalaman at nalalaman ko pa rin.

annoying as it sounds but I still thank God for it.

It's a gift. people need it.

and I'm the one who was chosen to give it to them. in a sort of stranger-suddenly-tells-you-everything's-going-to-be-fine-even-if-he-hardly-knew-you way.

though I really know that everything will be okay.

I mean,

bibigyan ka ba ng pagsubok ng Diyos na hindi mo kaya?

binigay niya sa'yo yan dahil alam niyang kaya mo. alam niya na hindi ka susuko.

katulad ngayon, sinusubukan na naman ata ako ng nasa itaas.

late ako nagising

off to work ang ka-macho-han ko, pero traffic masyadong magulo

aligaga ang mga tao

pero may isa dito na para bang kinuha sa kanya ang pagkakataong huminga manlang

pagsakay ko sa jeep, may nakita akong babae, kakaiba siya, tila bumagal ang mundo.

heto na naman po tayo

masikip, mainit, maalingasaw

pinagtitinginan siya ng mga ibang pasahero

tumatawa, tinuturo siya

pero hindi niya alintana yon

malayo ang tingin, malalim ang iniisip

heto na naman po tayo

tumabi ako sa kanya, di dahil maganda siya

wala na kasi akong maupuan

nagdikit ang mga braso namin

"Miss? Okay ka lang? Namamaga mata mo.."

nagulat siya

pinunasan ang mga luha sa mga mata

"Oo, okay lang ako."

BOOM

tila kinain ako ng inuupuan ko

daig ko pa nag time travel sa bilis ng pangyayari

pagdilat ko

hindi na ko nakaupo sa jeep na sinasakyan ko kanina lang

"Sandali lang naman, Jomar! hayaan mo naman ako mag-explain!

sambit ng isang babae sa likod ko

biruin mo siya yung katabi ko sa jeep eh

bakit na naman siya umiiyak?

"hmmm ate? hindi po Jomar pangalan ko?"

sagot ko sa kanya, pero nilagpasan niya ko

kakaiba din tong kakayahan na meron ako no?

muka kong shungang nagsasalita dito

"Ayoko na Anna. Pagod na ko."

sagot naman ng lalaki sa kanya

pagod? san galing kuya?

"please lang Jomar.. buntis ako.. sayo toh!"

patuloy na pag-iyak ni Anna

ganda ng name niya

"Ano?! hindi sakin yan Anna! umayos ka nga! Aalis na ko!"

gulat na sabi naman ni Jomar

"Please Jomar!"

kumapit sa kanya yung babae

pero tinulak niya ito

gusto ko sanang makielam

pero wala akong magawa

ito yung pangit dito eh

para kang multong dadaanan lang nila

nakatayo ka lang, para makita

makakita ng mga bagay na hindi naman dapat

pero sabi ko nga, blessing to

pain-in-the-ass blessing

naiwan si Anna sa kalsada habang nag-drive palayo yung lalaki

umiiyak pa rin siya

ikaw ba naman iwan nung mahal mo diba?

tapos buntis ka pa?

naglakad siya

kaya sinundan ko

pumunta siya dun sa isang tulay

tatalon na sana siya

pero may pumigil sa kanyang lalaki

hindi ako ah? kung may chance lang pipigilan ko talaga toh noh

"Wait, wag kang tatalon please!"

"Hayaan mo na ko."

"Hindi! Tara iuuwi kita sa inyo!"

"Sabi nang hayaan mo ko eh"

tinulak ni Anna yung lalaki

sakto namang dumating yung mga pulis

dinala si Anna sa presinto

dun sa Women's Desk para kausapin

mababait tao dito, inalagaan nila si Anna kahit sandali lang

hanggang sa hinayaan na nila itong maka-uwi ng manumbalik sa tamang huwisyo

sumakay siya ng jeep

uy ito na yung scene kung saan kami magkikita

tumingin siya sakin

sabay ngumiti

nakikita niya ko?

BOOM

balik present na ata ako

katabi ko na ulit siya

nakatingin

"Oo, okay lang ako."

"Ito panyo. Alam mo miss, may nabasa akong libro, sabi dun, mahal ka ng pamilya mo, pati ng Diyos, pati yang baby na nasa sinapupunan mo.."

"huh? p-pano mo nalaman?!"

"Isipin mo, kung sino man yung mga kasama mo ngayon or kakilala na alam mong mahal ka, sigurado yan yung sagot kung bakit ka iniwan ng mga tao dati, siguro sila yung dahilan at sila ang binigay para sila ang magbigay ng importansya ngayon, kaya siguro nawala yung dati para mahanap natin at magkaroon tayo ng atensyon sa iba, maaring iba ng mukha o ng pangalan, katulad niyang baby mo, kailangan niya ng nanay, kailangan ka niya. People come and go ika nga. Natututo tayo sa mga pagkakamali natin at ng ibang tao. Alam mo dapat kung kailan lalaban. Kung kailan kakapit. Never mong isara ang puso mo sa susunod na taong darating. Ingatan mo lang ang sarili mo. At higit sa lahat? Huwag padalos dalos sa desisyon."

natahimik siya

sino bang hindi

hindi mo naman kilala yung tao tapos bibigyan mo ng advice?

ngumiti lang siya sakin

hinawakan niya yung tiyan niya

"Alam mo tama ka.."

ngumiti lang ako bilang tugon sa sinabi niya

tumingin ako sa bintana

Punyemas

lagpas na ko sa bababaan ko

nagpaalam na ko sa kanya at dali daling bumaba ng jeep

tapos sakay ulit ng isa pa

"Manong bayad po. Guadalupe"

punyemas talaga oh

hindi ko madalas gamitin tong kakayahan na meron ako

iba kasi yung balik sakin

parang sakin napupunta yung problema nila

isa pa tong kakasakay lang sa jeep

inapakan ako ng malala

pero napatid siya kaya quits na

bumagal na naman yung mundo, yung bawat galaw ng tao

heto na naman po tayo

"Ay kuya, sorry po. okay lang kayo?"

sumagot siya, pero kalkulado ang mga galaw

tinatago ang mga mata, sa cap na suot niya

"Ah eh. o-oo okay lang ako.."

BOOM

hindi ko na naman alam kung nasan ako

utang na loob

nasusuka na ko, promise

"Tay! Wag po!!"

maliit na barungbarong

may pinapalo pa atang bata sa loob

"Ikaw! Hindi ka na nag-tanda! Diba sinabi ko sayong mag-trabaho ka? puro ka aral!"

"Tay gusto ko pong matuto!"

"Wala akong pake! Utang na loob naman, Joseph!"

sagot ng tatay sa kanyang anak, kasabay nito ang paglagok ng alak

"Dun ka nga sa nanay mo! Mga wala kayong kwenta! Mga pabigat! Lutuan niyo ko ng ulam, BILIS!"

sinipa ng lalaki ang batang patuloy sa pag-iyak

kasabay nito ang paghampas ng lalaki sa bata gamit ang boteng hawak nito

malalim ang naging sugat sa kamay ni Joseph

marka ng bawat pasakit na ibinigay ng tatay niya

tumambad kay Joseph ang isang bubog sa lapag

kinuha niya ito

at walang tigil na pinagsa-saksak ang tatay niya

sa leeg, sa dibdib

hanggang sa mawalan ito ng buhay

bumalik sa huwisyo ang batang musmos

at piniling umalis, tumakbo, nagpakalayo-layo

sa munting barungbarong na kinalakihan niya

bumigat yung dibdib ko

ito ang unang beses na makakita ako ng ganito

kita ko yung sakit, galit sa mga mata nung bata

sana manlang may nagawa ako

BOOM

bumalik ako sa realidad ng malungkot

sino yung batang iyon?

"HOLDAP TO!"

sigaw ng lalaking, umapak sakin kanina

kung minamalas ka namang talaga oh

may hawak siyang baril sa kanang kamay niya

may peklat

yung peklat

siya yung bata O_O

nagpanic ang mga tao

maingay

magulo

pero nanatili akong nakatingin sa kanya

Bakit?

yun yung tanong sa isip ko

ng makuha na niya ang dapat niyang kunin

dali dali siyang bumaba ng jeep

hinabol ko siya

hindi dahil nasa kanya yung pamasahe ko pauwi

gusto ko siyang tulungan

ang bilis niyang tumakbo

kagaya nung pag-takbo niya nung bata pa siya

Dead End

wala na siyang tatakbuhan

humarap siya sakin, at tinutok ang baril sa ulo ko

"Tumabi ka diyan! Ipuputok ko to sa ulo mo!"

nakatayo lang ako

hindi ko din naman alam gagawin ko

nilagay niya ang mga daliri sa gatilyo

"Tumabi ka sabi eh!"

buong lakas na sigaw niya

"Oo! Nagkamali ka. Oo, naka-patay ka! Oo, nasayo yung pamasahe ko pauwi, pati na rin yung mga gamit nung iba sa jeep kanina. Pero ikaw ba talaga toh? Joseph?"

"Pano mo nalaman yung pangalan ko, Ha? Sino ka?!"

naiinis na siya

konti na lang eh magkakalat na yung utak ko dito sa maliit na kalsada

"Hindi na mahalaga kung paano at sino ako, ikaw ba talaga toh? Ha, Jospeh? Nasaan na yung batang gustong gusto mag-aral? matuto? yung batang tatakas para lang makapasok? yung batang may pangarap para sa kanya, at sa nanay niya? Ang buhay hindi yan tungkol sa pagkabigo at pagdurusa, tungkol yan sa mga pagkakataong bumabawi ka, bumangon ulit. Hindi ka huhusgahan ng matalinong tao sa pagkakamali mo, mabuti kang tao, Let Go. huwag kang mabuhay sa nakaraan, tsaka ang problema, hindi yan tinatalikuran, hinaharap yan! Hindi tayo perpekto, alam ng Diyos yun, wag ka lang makakalimot sa taas, tutulungan ka niya."

natahimik siya

hindi alam ang gagawin

"sumuko ka na sa mga pulis, itama mo yung mga bagay na mali, you deserve more, you deserve a life. kaya please tama na. isipin mo nalang nanay mo."

lumapit ako at kinuha ang baril sa kamay niya

umiyak siya sa harap ko

sakto naman ang dating ng mga kagawad at kinuha nila si Billy

dinala nila sa Barangay

naibalik ang mga gamit

hindi naman nag-sampa ng kaso yung kasama namin sa jeep kanina

wala naman daw nasaktan

isang buong araw mamamalagi si Bily sa likod ng malamig na rehas

pagtapos ipapagamot siya ng isang Volunteer worker

kita na kasi sa kanya yung pagiging Traumatized at Depression

pagkatapos non?

hindi ko na alam

sa buhay kailangan natin mag-desisyon

sana tama na yung piliin niyang daanan ngayon

"Oy pag okay ka na, hanapin mo ko ah? Inuman tayo ganon!"

natawa siya

"Sige sige, Salamat ah."

tumulo na naman ang mga luha sa mga mata

at tuluyan na siyang nilayo sa Front Desk, dadalhin na daw siya dun sa kwarto niya

Ugh

Hindi na ko papasok, masyadong naging mahaba ang araw na ito

Pano ba ko uuwi -___-"

habang lutang ako kakahanap ng daan eh may nabungo ako

patay natapon yung ulam na dala niya

nagkalat yun sa harap ng barangay hall yung adobong bagong luto

tanga ko

"Ay! Sorry miss. Nako, Sorry talaga, hindi kasi ako tumitingin sa daan. Nasaktan ka ba?"

sambit ko habang pinupulot yung baunan sa lapag

baka pulis tatay nito lagot ako

"Nako. sorry talaga, babayaran ko na lang yan."

pero kanina pa siya walang sagot

nakatingin lang siya sakin

"Papalitan ko na lang yan, okay lang ba?"

tumango lang siya

at dali dali naman akong bumili ng sinigang sa kalapit na Karinderia

inabot ko to sa kanya

pero tahimik pa rin talaga siya

"Okay ka lang ba?"

pagtatanong ko

hinawakan ko siya sa balikat

"Okay lang ako.."

pero as usual

nag-expect ako ng kwento sa likod ng mga ngiti niya

kota na rin kasi ako ngayong araw

nanghihina na rin ako

pero

WALA

BLANK

nakaka-pagtaka

first time in a while

pero siya naman tong sobrang dilat yung mga mata

parang may naalala?

parang may bright idea?

ah basta ganon

"Jana! Dala mo ba yung ulam ko, anak?"

lagot kagawad pala tatay nito

"Anong pangalan mo?"

Ayon! First time in 15846516874 years, nagsalita ka rin!

"Jose. Jan tawag sakin ng mommy ko."

ngumiti lang siya

pagtapos nun eh iniwan niya ko dito sa labas

aantayin ko na lang siya

papaturo ako pauwi

pero

bakit kaya wala akong nakita sa kanya..

-Flashback-

20 years ago. May mga kapatid ako, actually panganay ako, 2 younger sisters tapos isang baby brother, maganda business noon nila mama, kaya medyo maganda bahay namin, nasa middle siya ng maraming halaman at puno, masarap yung pamumuhay

One afternoon, umalis sila mama, naiwan kami sa bahay, tapos merong mga lalaki na pumasok, hindi ko sila kilala, kaya bilang panganay kailangan ko protektahan yung mga kapatid ko, nagsimula silang magtanong kung nasan yung mga mahahalagang ari-arian namin, pera, titulo ng business o ng lupa, at kung ano-ano pa, pero wala akong naisagot, hindi ko naman kasi talaga alam.

Nainis sila, pinagsisira nila yung mga gamit namin, hanggang nagsalita yung leader nila

"ah wala? baka gusto mong maghanap? ay sige ganito na lang, hahanapin mo yung pinapahanap namin, kapalit ng buhay ng mga kapatid mo, 10 minutes each?"

I don't want to remember anything

Hinalughog ko yung bahay namin, sa attic, sa basement, sa sala, kung saan saan, mahanap lang yung bagay na magpapaalis sa kanila pero huli na ko, 30 minutes, may bala na sa ulo yung mga kapatid ko. Ako na lang natira.

The irony, palagi kong sinasabi sa kanila na kumapit lang sa Diyos, pero I don't believe in one myself. I never did, after nung .... past. Ganon naman siya eh, wala siya kung kelan kailangan mo siya.

dapat ginalingan ko yung paghahanap ko

sana may nagawa ako

pero wala

wala

Pagtapos nun hindi na nahanap yung mga pumasok sa bahay namin, takot na rin yung nanay at tatay ko kaya pinili naming mangibang bansa, pero bago daw kami makarating sa Airport, naaksidente daw yung sinasakyan namin, yun yung kwento sakin, wala na rin kasi akong maalala, nabura na, o pilit ko lang talagang kinalumutan yung lahat.

-End of Flashback-

Inabot na ko ng dilim dito sa labas ng barangay

Hindi ko talaga alam pauwi

hanggang sa may lumapit sakin

"kanina ka pa ba diyan?" tanong niya

"ah, oo hmm papaturo sana ako pauwi? Alam mo ba sakayan papuntang Fairview dito?"

"Hindi mo ba ako naaalala?"

"Huh? Ah eh. Ikaw yung babaeng nabunggo ko diba?" ngumiti lang siya

ganda ng mga mata niya

"Hindi yon! Jana? Yung kababata mo? Sabay tayong naglalaro non!"

wala talaga akong maalala

"Ay sorry ah? Wala talaga eh" pinakita ko yung peklat sa ulo ko "Naaksidente ako nung bata pa ko?"

"Alam ko.." mahinang sagot niya

"Huh? panong alam mo?"

"Nakita ko.."

"Panong naki-"

ngumiti na naman siya

"Nakita ko.. Kung pano mo nakikita yung kung anong meron sa nakaraan ng bawat nakakasalubong mo?"

Woah

NO WAY!

"ah eh."

I was frozen

hindi ko alam kung anong sasabihin ko

"You're one heck of a disaster, Jan." tumawa siya

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