One of my closest friends from high school is the most unique person I have met in my 18 years of life. My friend Andrew, who I have been a good friend with since the sixth grade has many different beliefs and values in his life. Compared to mine at least. When it comes to family, college, and a career there are a lot of things that we have different ideas and beliefs on. I knew he would be a great subject to sit down with and discuss these specific topics. Not only does Andrew have a lot of his own beliefs, but also he isn’t afraid to let others know about to them. We both have a similar personality, but are extremely different in other aspects.
As individuals Andrew and I are very similar. Our personalities relate to one another extremely well. Andrew and I communicate with each other in our own way. An outsider looking in couldn’t even understand a conversation between the two of us at times. Anyone who knows either of us knows that if you’re hanging out with the two us you’re in for a day filled with laughs and acts of randomness. I have known Andrew for eight years now and I can confidently say he is one of a kind. He is a completely unpredictable person and I think that’s why I am so close with him. When thinking of the similarities between Andrew and myself, I think the fact that we enjoy each other’s company so much makes us as close as we are. We are two individuals, although we relate on many things, we aren’t the same person and have different views and thoughts on many subjects.
When I got together with Andrew recently and began discussing family, the first topic of my Analytical Paper, Andrew replied, “I don’t have a family”. Now - 1 - before he gets the poor and abused label, this is the type of thing Andrew says on a daily basis. He’s not the type of kid to sit down and have a serious conversation with you right away. If you want to hear what he has to say, it takes a little bit of dragging it out of him sometimes. However other times you can’t get him to be quiet. The fact was that I already knew about his views on family. “Responsibility, connection, commitment” Andrew hasn’t shown these qualities for eight years. When it comes to his family life, I’m embarrassed at times. If I ever talked to my mother or father the way Andrew does I might end up getting a backhand to the face. Looking back at our childhood together it only makes sense. He has never been committed to anything a day in his life. My parents had me playing hockey and little league since I was five years old. I grew up with commitments and being apart of a team. Andrew never knew what it was like to be apart of something like that. Andrew actually shows a lot of respect to older people, which is very surprising because he has no respect for his parents what so ever. Somewhere down the road in life Andrew and family separated. I’m not sure when it happened, but it most certainly did, I don’t know maybe that’s what he means when he says things like “I don’t have a family”.
I am a freshman at the University of Rhode Island. My sister goes to school in Worcester, Massachusetts and my brother graduated from URI last spring. It was expected of me as the youngest child of my family, to go to college. I worked throughout high school all around the idea of me attending college. Andrew dropped out of high school in his junior year and got his G.E.D. When asked about going to - 2 - college and whether or not it was supported or encouraged in his family, I knew right away this was a touchy subject. “It’s definitely supported” he spoke about earlier in the year when he was thinking about attending the New England Institute of Technology or the Community College of Rhode Island. Andrew was a little uncomfortable with this part of the conversation, scratching his head and making many nervous hand gestures. I could tell that he regrets every second of dropping out of high school. He began talking about how much he would love it if he were at U.R.I. with me. Whether or not college was expected or encouraged was kind of irrelevant. If you expect your son to go to college and encourage him to work hard enough to get to college, how can you allow them to dropout of high school? The fault can be put on Andrew without a doubt, he dropped out of school, not his parents. In my house, however dropping out of high school was not even an option. I couldn’t drop out of school because I knew who I would be letting down and who it effected. Sometimes I think Andrew needs people to let down and effect beside just himself. This is a major difference between Andrew and I, and the cultural background each of us grew up in. In my family it is expected, supported, and encouraged to go to college from day one. Some people may think that going to college isn’t everything in life, but in my culture, in my family it is everything.
If there is one thing that Andrew is certain about in his life it’s a career. For as long as I’ve known him I’ve known that Andrew wants to become a firefighter. So when our conversation came across career, it was a question that both of us already - 3 - knew the answer too. Whether or not a career is expected from his family or not, it is expected out of himself. As previously stated Andrew’s family isn’t the definition of the American dream, but he’s 18 years old. “I expect myself to have a career, doesn’t matter if my parents expect it or not”. Andrew has realized his parents and him don’t have the greatest relationship and takes a lot of initiative to get things done himself. Looking at Andrew’s background, if he achieves this goal of his, and he becomes a firefighter, I consider that him making the best of his situation. Talking about his goal with him it’s easy to see how much this means to him. The excitement in his voice and how knowledgeable he is on the subject, he knows what he wants and is determined to get it done. I felt proud of him in a sense when we were talking about this subject.
When it comes to things like security, money, satisfaction, and contribution I know that it is entirely about his satisfaction. Andrew always has and always will be about his own satisfaction, and you can see it when you sit down and talk to him. When I asked Andrew why he wanted to become a firefighter he didn’t give the usual I want to save people from emergencies type deal. It was more on the lines of him getting the best paycheck he can without a college degree. No matter what the situation is or what the subject is, it always has to benefit himself. The problem however, is Andrew doesn’t want to work for anything he wants it all to be spoon fed to him. Sometimes and I am proud of him trying to become a firefighter and another part of me is angry with him for putting his life to waste sometimes. I think - 4 -
Andrew and I are such good friends to date because of our different views on things. He brings a different side out of me that no one else can and I put a little reality back into his life. Some things he does I can completely understand, but other times I have no idea.
The entire conversation I held with Andrew was very interesting. I have had millions of crazy conversations with him in the past, but now that I was talking to him for a certain purpose, trying to get an analytical paper out of it, I witnessed many things. I’ve never watched Andrew so intently, I mean for eight years I have been talking with this person and I learned so many things about him in fifteen minutes. Never have I seen how much of a nervous person he is. For the whole conversation, every time a somewhat serious topic was brought up Andrew’s head went straight down and began playing with his hands. Andrew and I can talk about anything, but the topics I asked about were bothering him. It was almost as if he was ashamed of himself when it came to these subjects because I know for a fact there’s no way he was nervous about talking to me. Andrew and I have different point of views on most of these subjects.
I would never argue with Andrew about any of these topics. All of them are of your own personal construct. I was raised by my parents to believe in certain things and want to achieve certain goals. Andrew and many other children aren’t raised to want the same things as me. I would never put Andrew at fault for his beliefs, that’s the beauty of being an individual. It relies a lot on what you were brought up to believe and want, but

- 5 - in the end it’s all on you. Your biggest influence in your life I believe is your family, for my life it is anyway. Others like Andrew are not as fortunate as I am to have as much a supportive family that wants me to succeed. If there were one thing that really puts this into perspective for me at the end of our discussion, it would have to be that Andrew “doesn’t have a family”. Without my family I really don’t have a clue where I would be today. It makes you appreciate what you’ve had for your whole life that other kids have never experienced. Family, culture, and yourself all play roles in a person’s identity. I’m extremely happy to say that I am very proud of my family, culture, and myself. As well as the identity I have developed of myself today.

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