Group Assignment
Critical Review of a Proposal

Assessment of Role of Micro and Small Enterprises on Economic Empowerment of Women: A survey of Women Operated Urban Agriculture Enterprises in Wukro Woreda, Tigray

Group Members 1. Bersabeh Elias 2. Dagmawit Meried 3. Kalkidan Amdie 4. Kalkidan Wubie 5. Maria Alemu

June 21/2014
Addis Ababa
Content

Introduction ? i. Title page * The title page did not have a page number (which is correct) * The purpose of the research was clearly specified as : A Research Proposal Submitted in Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for the Master of Arts Degree in Development Studies * Name of the researcher is stated: * Advisor and co-advisors are mentioned * Place, Month and year (December 2011) is also mentioned ii. Acronyms
Abbreviation should have come before/at the beginning of the proposal next to title page. (The abbreviations are in alphabetic order, which is correct)
The following abbreviations are used in the proposal but not found in the list of abbreviations
FAO – Food and Agriculture Organization
FDRE – Federal Democratic Republic of Ethiopia
HIV/AIDS – Human Immunodeficiency Virus/ Acquired Immuno- Deficiency Syndrome
MFI – Micro Finance Institution
MSE –Small and Medium Sized Enterprises
NAP-GE – National Action Plan for Gender Equality
NGO – Non Governmental Organization
REWA – Revolutionary Ethiopian Women’s Association
UN – United Nation
UNDP – United Nations Development Program
UA – Urban agriculture is put as “UA (Urban Agriculture)” which is not necessary as the abbreviation is explained in the list of abbreviations
WAO – is used to describe both “Women Association Organization” and “Women’s Affairs Office” which is not appropriate
The following abbreviations are also not written properly in the proposal.

Table 1. Abbreviations not found in the list S/N | How it is written | How It should be written | Remark | | Abbreviation | Description | Abbreviation | Description | | 1 | UNFPA | United Nation Fund Program Association | UNFPA | United Nations Population Program | Not properly written in list of abbreviation | 2 | US | * | USD | United Stated Dollar | It is mentioned in chapter two but not in list of abbreviations |

iii. Content * Contents were misplaced (the content is misplaced), came at last (page 31), also has page number which is not in Romans number * It should come after abbreviations rather than putting at the end next to the references list iv. List of tables
Were misplaced and submitted in a separated page v. List of figures List of figure is misplaced and submitted in a separated page
All chapters were placed in separate pages.

Chapter One
Introduction
1.1 Background of the study
It is briefly written in deductive order as follows;

1.2 Statement of the Problem * Practical gaps is identified (only one gap) * Facts motivated the researcher is clearly stated specifically in paragraph 4.

1.3 Research questions
Each research question addresses the specific objectives of the proposed research.

Table 2. Research questions and specific objectives Research question | Specific objectives | * Does participation in urban agriculture enterprises increase the income of the women participants? | * To examine the enhancement of the income of the women participating in urban agriculture enterprises. | * Do women participants in the urban agriculture enterprise have available resources and skills to use them? | * To examine the availability of resources and skills for women participants of the enterprise. | * Does it enhance ownership over economic resources of women participants? | * To examine the enhancement of ownership over economic resources of the women participants. | * Does it improve the power of the women for decision making at the household level? | * To assess the women’s decision making power at house hold level. | * What are the constraints women MSE operators face in maintaining economic activities and advancing income level and how these limitations can be resolved? | * To assess the constraints women in advancing the economic activities and income level in the urban agriculture enterprises. | 1.4 Research Objectives
General Objectives
Specific objectives – All specific objectives are addressed by research questions as mentioned above. 1.5 Scope and limitation of the study
This chapter was explained in correct way.
Scope
Focuses on the role of the urban agriculture enterprise on promoting women’s economic empowerment in which women are highly represented. The study will only dwell on those women operated MSEs operating on urban agriculture.

Limitation * Since the study focuses only on the urban agriculture sector it cannot represent other sub sectors. * Methodological constraints that can affect the results of the research because of the absence of focus group discussion to support the survey methods that the researcher will employ. * Generalization of some facts and findings of the study may be limited to the specific woreda. 1.6 Significance of the study

Stated as below and it is fine. * To look as to whether women operated MSE’s has the role in empowering women economically, particularly to owners of urban agriculture enterprises. * Provide information, to parties like researches, students and academicians, on the contribution of women operated urban agriculture enterprises. * Serve as a guide for other studies, which may focus on similar topics and issues, related to micro and small business in general & urban agriculture sector enterprise in particular. * Important for policy makers like MSE development agencies * Women micro and small business owners to tackle their failures to be empowered more economically by suggesting some practical measures to be taken by these businesses in order to solve the number of problems faced.

Flow of the chapter
The following table shows flow of chapter one on the proposal with corrections made.
Table3. Chapter one flow and correction Flow of the proposal | Correct flow for a proposal – | Comment | Chapter 1 introduction | 1.1 Background of the study 1.2 Statement of the Problem 1.3 Research Questions 1.4 Objectives of the Study 1.5 Significance of the Study 1.6 Scope and Limitation of the Study 1.7 Organization of the Paper | 1.1 background of the study 1.2 statement of the problem 1.3 research questions 1.4 research objectives 1.5 scope and limitation of the study 1.6 significance of the study 1.7 definition of key terminologies | It would have been correct flow if 1.5 comes after 1.6 |

CHAPTER TWO
Review of Related Literature
2.1 Literature Review
Makdas’ Proposal does not have an introductory part of a literature review. Pertinent to this, the broad bodies of the literature that has relevance for the research are not covered. The following are some examples; * Global issue and trends related to the topic, regional or industrial facts are not in print or considered. Sub-Saharan African or east African countries experience specifically or vast explanation on urban agriculture topic could have been included as a separate sub topic. * Extraneous independent variables are not conceptually defined in the proposal and education could be one example. * Relationships among the variables/ Relationship between independent and dependent variables: in this proposal the independent variables could be socio-demographic factors, MSE’s and also other and/or extraneous variables. * Adequacy/quality: as the researcher did not include introduction of related literatures which affects the quality of the reviews.
Flow of the theory is well designed from the point of view of the general aspect of ensuring empowerment at broader perspective to Specific theories that can frame the empowerment of women in the existing economy, although the sub topics are not well structured. The review of related literature section do not need to divide in to a numbered separate subtopics rather it should present the sub topic in bold only. The following table suggests how it should be organized.
Table 4. Chapter two flow and correction S/N | Flow of the proposal | Correct flow for a proposal | | Review of Related Literature | Review of Related Literature | 1 | 2.1 Theoretical Framework | 2.1 Review of Literature | 2 | 2.2 Women Empowerment Aspects of Empowerment: | Women Empowerment Importance of Women Empowerment for Development Women Empowerment: Countries Experience Urban Agriculture Benefits of Urban Agriculture for Women for Women Economic Empowerment Constraints Faced by Women Urban Farmers Micro and Small Enterprises and Women Economic Empowerment Framework of Women Empowerment in Ethiopia MSE Development and Women Operators in Ethiopia | 3 | 2.3 Micro and Small Enterprises and Women Economic Empowerment | | 4 | 2.4 Benefits of Urban Agriculture for Women Economic Empowerment | | 5 | 2.5 Constraints Face by Women Urban Farmers | | 6 | 2.6 Countries Experience on Women Empowerment | | 7 | 2.7 Importance of Women Empowerment to Development | | 8 | 2.8 Framework of Women Empowerment in Ethiopia | | 9 | 2.9 MSE Development and Women Operators in Ethiopia | 2.2 Theoretical Framework |

In explaining countries experience on women empowerment a specific countries experience is not mentioned rather Africa in general is mentioned and this section needs to narrow down and show some nation’s experience and make some comparisons.
2.2 Theoretical Framework
The theoretical frame work of a study helps a researcher to focus on a specific objective of the research, situate research in a scholarly conversation and provide appropriate language. It also helps the researcher to identify the strength and weakness of the study area.
Theoretical framework describes the theory which explains why the research problem under the study exists. * On this proposal the theoretical Framework should have come at the end of the literature review in order to conclude and cluster literatures depicted under this chapter. * The researcher does not clearly define the independent and dependent variables within a theoretical/conceptual framework. The theoretical framework focuses mainly on the feminist theory of other literatures instead of defining the distinction, relationships and testability of these determining factors of independent and dependent variables.
Chapter Three
Research Methods and Data Collection
The researcher has started the section by Site selection & Description of the study area and has mentioned reasons why this particular wereda is selected for conducting the study. 3.1 Site Selection and Description of the Study Area

(Paragraph 2); Wukro is one of 9 wereda’s in the Eastern Tigray Region of Ethiopia situated 45kms far away from North of Mekelle town. The town is second largest in the Eastern part of Tigray and is known as the main city of the Kilte Awulaelo wereda. Wukro is the nearest town to Mekelle which gives it a conducive environment to investment and trade opportunities (Negasi 2010).
(Paragraph 4); The wereda is selected purposively for the reason that the interest of the researcher to work on the wereda is very high, since the wereda is well known by the researcher and in addition, the observations of the researcher about the women operated enterprises initiated the researcher to study on the area.
Paragraph three line 6 the statement “In the wereda there are about 1398 micro and small enterprises from which 582 are female and 816 are male.” Should be “In the wereda there are about 1398 micro and small enterprises from which 582 are female and 816 are male owned.” Or “In the wereda there are about 1398 micro and small enterprise operators from which 582 are female and 816 are male.”
The following section talks about the type of the study & what type of data sources the researcher used to meet the objective of the study.
3.2 Data Type and Source
This study is a survey study which uses both primary and secondary data sources to meet the objectives of the study. The required primary data’s for the study will be collected from the purposely selected women participants of the urban agriculture enterprises in the selected wereda as they can give clear and important information related to their condition. The study does also require some secondary data which are collected from the woreda’s micro and small enterprise office, woreda’s trade and industry office, women association organization offices in which the enterprises are found, policy documents and reports. * Upon describing the data type and source the researcher didn’t mention whether she used qualitative/ quantitative data type regarding it to the specific objectives of why the research is conducted. * The exact specific document to be used in the secondary data collection wasn’t specified Cleary. * In the research strategy & design section, the researcher has explained that she used both qualitative & quantitative strategies and why she preferred to do so.
3.3 Research Strategy and Design
A combination of both qualitative and quantitative approaches will be employed to conduct the research. Using both quantitative and qualitative approaches are useful to identify the strengths and weakness of each methodology and help to complement their divergent approaches (Weinreich 2006 cited in Abreham 2010). * The researcher has tried to summarize the sample frame of respondents by a simple table showing the type of occupation & number of respondents s/no | Type of occupation | Year of establishment | No of participants | Sample size of respondents | | | | | | 1 | Livestock production | 1994-2001 | 26 | 26 | 2 | Dairy production | 1992-2001 | 82 | 82 | 3 | Irrigation for crop production | 1995-2001 | 10 | 10 | | Total | | | 118 |
Table 5. Sample frame of respondents

Source: Wukro micro and small enterprise office * The researcher didn’t clearly show the specific target population and the characteristics of those chosen respondents. * The researcher didn’t differentiate census from survey, as they are different methods of research design. She had to decide and use one of the techniques instead she used the term Census Survey to describe her choice of design.
3.4 Target Population and Sampling
(Line 10) Therefore a census survey is going to be conducted, in other means a total of 118 women respondents are selected from the MSE of urban agriculture sector. * The researcher didn’t specify as to how she is going to conduct the census/survey Design, nor did she specify why she chose that method to conduct the study * The researcher has put the data collection methods chosen to conduct the study with the specification of as to why they were chosen
3.5 Data Collection and instruments
In section 3.3 Data collection Instruments;
The researcher explained data collection instruments to be used and attached questionnaire. The following is critics on this questionnaire * There should be code, data collector/enumerator name, place of data collection (Kebele at least) and date in each questionnaire * Question number 4 choice number 4 – Above what? * Question number 17 – there should be a “total/average section/cell” to write the total/average or the last row for reach column should be split in to two. * Question number 18- Operational definition should be provide for increased and decreased greatly, Question number 36 should be “For which of the following infrastructures you have access?” * For question number 48 there should be an option “other /specify_________” * Under interview question for officers of Agriculture, MSE and Kebele offices, question number 4 should have more than one option or the question should limit number of constraints and challenges to empower women through the enterprise development.

* Under sampling and key informant interview there are statements about homogenous group and it is not clear what “homogenous groups” are referred (and their size too?)

3.6 Data Collection Procedure
The researcher didn’t explain all components of this section how the data collection will be administered, like “when” and role of peoples involved.
3.7 Methods of Data Processing and Analysis Flow of the proposal | Correct flow for a proposal | Comment | 3.1 Site Selection and Description of the Study Area 3.2 Data Type and Source 3.3 Research Strategy and Design Sampling 3.4 Data Collection Instruments 3.5 Methods of Data Processing and Analysis | 3.1 site selection and description of the study area3.2 Data type and source3.3 research strategy and design3.4 Target population and sampling 3.5 data collection and instruments3.6 data collection procedures 3.7 data processing and analysis 3.8 time and budget schedule | The highlighted sub-parts of chapter 3 was not included in the proposal In addition;List of chapter three components are not well numbered as follows 3.2 Data Type and Source 3.1 Research Strategy and Design 3.2 Sampling 3.3 Data Collection Instruments 3.4 Methods of Data Processing and Analysis | After the collected data is checked carefully whether they are consistent or not, then statistical packages for social science (SPSS) software will be employed for the data entry to analyze the information gathered. The descriptive techniques will be adopted for analysis of data there fore the study will use descriptive statistical measures such as frequency, averages, percentage, figures and tables for the result presentation and summarization of the data collected through questionnaire. How ever the requests obtained through interview will be presented in a summarized form. * But While explaining the method of data processing & analysis, the researcher hasn’t clearly mentioned the data analysis tools planned to conduct the research
The section didn’t include time and budget schedule.
Flow of the chapter
The following table shows flow of chapter three on the proposal with corrections made.
Table 6. Chapter three flow and correction

General Critics 1. General Structure of the proposal
The proposal is divided in to four separate pieces while it should be organized in to one document. 2. Citation
In writing cites there is lack of consistency in locating the author’s name and date. In some paragraphs punctuations are not used between the source or the writers name and the year while it is well written in other paragraphs. * Citation of citation of citation is used which is not recommended “(Ratta & Naasr, 1996; Mougeot; 1999: 8 in Mohamed 2002)” * Page 22 paragraph 3 line 1 “He also…” should be “ibid.,p.”
The following table shows wrongly used citations with corrections based on Harvard system
Table 7. Chapter one citation problems with correction S/N | Chapter 1 and Paragraph | Wrongly referenced Cited | Correct referencing Cited | | Chapter 1.1 and Paragraph 1 | * (Bezabih 2007) * (Meron 2007) * (Emily et al. 2006) | * (Bezabih,2007) * (Meron, 2007) * Emily et al. (2006) | | Chapter 1.1 and Paragraph 2 | * Kabeer (2001) cited in Deepti (2006) * (Femida & Meenza 2004) | * Kabeer ,2001, cited in Deepti, 2006 * (Femida and Meenza, 2004) | | Chapter 1.1 paragraph 3 | * (Anjali 2007) * (Harper 1996 cited in Muleta 2008). | * (Anjali ,2007) * (Harper, 1996, cited in Muleta, 2008) | | Chapter 1.1 paragraph 4 | * (Mulugeta 2008) * (Haimanot 2007) * (Bezabih 2007) | * (Mulugeta , 2008) * (Haimanot, 2007) * (Bezabih, 2007) | | Chapter 1.1 paragraph 5 | * (Annika & Catharina 2009) | * (Annika and Catharina, 2009) | | Chapter 1.1 paragraph 6 | * (MOFED 2010) | * (MOFED, 2010) | | Chapter 1.2 paragraph 1 | * (Sarah 2003) | * (Sarah, 2003) | | Chapter 1.2 paragraph 2 | * United Nations (2001); report cited in Bezabih, 2007 * (National Committee for Traditional Practices Eradication (NCTPE), 2003 cited in Wabekbon development consultant Plc 2006) | * United Nations, 2001, cited in Bezabih, 2007 * (National Committee for Traditional Practices Eradication (NCTPE), 2003, cited in Wabekbon development consultant Plc, 2006) | | Chapter 1.2 paragraph 2 | * (Yeshiareg 2006) | * (Yeshiareg, 2006) |

Table 8. Chapter two citation problems with correction S/N | Wrongly written cites | How it should be | Where | Remark | 1 | (Beijing 1995) | (Beijing,1995) | Page 7 , Paragraph 1 | | 2 | (ibid 1995) | ibid, page number., | Page 7 , Paragraph 1 | | 3 | (Luk 2009) | (Luk,2009) | Page 7 , Paragraph 2 | | 5 | (Ibid, 1994) | Ibid, page number., | Page 8 , Paragraph 1 | | 6 | (Margaret et al. 2002) | Margaret et al.(2002) | Page 8 , Paragraph 2 | | 7 | (ibid, 2002) | ibid, page number., | Page 8 , Paragraph 3 | | 8 | (Wickramasinghe 2000 cited in Muleta 2008) | Wickramasinghe ,2000, cited in Muleta,2008 | Page 8 , Paragraph 4 | | 9 | Kabeer (2001) cited in Emily, Shirini and Chris (2006, p.3) | Kabeer, 2001, cited in Emily, Shirini and Chris, 2006 | Page 8 , Paragraph 4 | | 10 | Longwe 1991 cited in Joyce 2001 | Longwe, 1991, cited in Joyce, 2001 | Page 8 Paragraph 5 | | 11 | (Daman 2003) | (Daman,2003) | Page 9 Paragraph 1 | | 13 | (Bezabih 2007) | (Bezabih,2007) | Page 9 Paragraph 2 | | 15 | The United Nations Population Fund (UNPF) 2010 | The United Nations Population Fund (2010) | Page 9 Paragraph 5 | | 16 | (Rosalind 2001) | (Rosalind,2001) | Page 10 Paragraph 1 | | 18 | (Meron 2007) | (Meron,2007) | Page 10 Paragraph 3 | | 19 | Sophie & Lisette 2007 | Sophie and Lisette (2007) | Page 10 Paragraph 4 | | 20 | Gelb (2001) cited in Ozigbo & Ezeaku (2009) | Gelb,2001,cited in Ozigbo and Ezeaku,2009 | Page 11 Paragraph 3 | | 21 | (Ozigbo & Ezeaku 2009) | (Ozigbo and Ezeaku,2009) | Page 11 Paragraph 4 | | 23 | (ibid 2009) | Ibid, page number., | Page 11 Paragraph 4 | | 26 | (ibid 2009) | ibid, page number., | Page 12 Paragraph 2 | | 27 | (Yeshiareg 2007) | (Yeshiareg,2007) | Page 12 Paragraph 4 | | 28 | (FAO 2007) | (FAO,2007) | Page 13 Paragraph 3 | | 29 | Mougeot (2000) in FAO (2007) | Mougeot,2000, cited in FAO, 2007 | Page 13 Paragraph 4 | | 32 | (Alice 2001) | (Alice,2001) | Page 14 Paragraph 1 | | 33 | (Alice 2001) | (Alice,2001) | Page 14 Paragraph 2 | Could be” ibid, page number.,” | 34 | (Ozigbo & Ezeaku 2009) | (Ozigbo and Ezeaku,2009). | Page 14 Paragraph 2 | | 35 | (Ratta 1993 cited in Alice 2001) | Ratta, 1993,cited in Alice,2001 | Page 14 Paragraph 3 | | 36 | (Mohamed 2002) | (Mohamed,2002) | Page 15 Paragraph 1 | | 38 | (Alice 2001) | (Alice,2001) | Page 15 Paragraph 3 | | 41 | (Ibid 2011) | ibid, page number., | Page 16 Paragraph 1 | | 44 | (Alice 2001) | (Alice,2001) | Page 16 Paragraph 3 | | 45 | (Nivedita 2010) | (Nivedita,2010) | Page 16 Paragraph 3 | | 47 | (UN 1995) | (UN,1995) | Page 17 Paragraph 1 | | 48 | (Ozigbo & Ezeaku 2009) | (Ozigbo and Ezeaku,2009) | Page 17 Paragraph 1 | | 49 | (Ozigbo & Ezeaku 2009) | Ozigbo & Ezeaku (2009) | Page 17 Paragraph 2 | Could be” ibid, page number.,” | 50 | (Endalkachew 2008) | (Endalkachew,2008) | Page 17 Paragraph 3 | | 52 | (Ozigbo & Ezeaku 2009) | (Ozigbo and Ezeaku,2009) | Page 17 Paragraph 5 | | 53 | (Yeshiareg 2007) | (Yeshiareg,2007) | Page 18 Paragraph 1 | | 54 | (Ratta & Naasr, 1996; Mougeot; 1999: 8 in Mohamed 2002) | * | Page 18 Paragraph 2 | Citation of citation of citation is not allowed to use | 55 | (Kamla & Princy 2006) | (Kamla and Princy ,2006) | Page 18 Paragraph 4 | | 56 | Ibid (2006) | ibid, page number., | Page 18 Paragraph 4 | | 57 | (Ester 2008) | (Ester,2008) | Page 18 Paragraph 5 | | 58 | (UNFPA 2005) | (UNFPA,2005) | Page 19 Paragraph 1 | | 59 | (Kamla & Princy 2006) | (Kamla and Princy,2006) | Page 19 Paragraph 2 | | 60 | (ILO 2008) | (ILO,2008) | Page 19 Paragraph 3 | | 61 | Ranadive (2004) cited in Bezabih (2007) | Ranadive,2004, cited in Bezabih ,2007 | Page 19 Paragraph 4 | | 62 | (UNFPA 2010) | (UNFPA,2010) | Page 19 Paragraph 5 | | 63 | (Beijing 1995) | (Beijing,1995) | Page 20 Paragraph 1 | | 64 | (Ibid 1995) | ibid, page number., | Page 20 Paragraph 1 | | 69 | (MOFED 2010, p.18) | (MOFED,2010) | Page 21 Paragraph 2 | Page number is needed only for quotations | 72 | (Bureau of plan and finance 2003) | (Bureau of plan and finance,2003) | Page 22 Paragraph 2 | | 73 | (Benyam 2008) | (Benyam,2008) | Page 22 Paragraph 3 | | 74 | (Stevenson and St-Onage: 2005:11) | (Stevenson and St-Onage,2005) | Page 22 Paragraph 5 | | 75 | (Benyam 2008) | (Benyam,2008) | Page 23 Paragraph 2 | | 76 | (Endalkachew 2008) | (Endalkachew,2008) | Page 23 Paragraph 3 | |

Table 9. Chapter three citation problems with correction S/N | Paragraph | Wrongly referenced (Cited) | Correct referencing (Citing) | | One | (Aynalem 2008) | (Aynalem, 2008) | | Two | (Negasi 2010) | (Negasi, 2010) | | Three | (Wukro MSE office) | (Wukro, MSE, office) | | Six | (Weinreich 2006 cited in Abreham 2010) | (Weinreich, 2006, cited in Abreham, 2010) |

Referencing
In this proposal we have seen some referencing problems based on the Harvard referencing system and listed below under each chapter.
Table 10. Chapter one referencing problems with correction S/N | How it is referenced | How it should have been referenced | Remark | | Anne, S 2006, The Involvement of Women and Men in Micro & Small Enterprises (MSEs) in Nefas Silk Lafto Sub City, discussion paper & guideline to construct a gender-sensitive "Job Market", Addis Ababa, Nefas Silk Lafto sub city. | Anne, S (2006) The Involvement of Women and Men in Micro & Small Enterprises (MSEs) in Nefas Silk Lafto Sub City. Discussion paper & guideline to construct a gender-sensitive "Job Market". Addis Ababa: Nefas Silk Lafto sub city. | | | Bezabih, T 2007, Socio-economic impact of self help groups, Graduate school of social work, Addis Ababa University, Ethiopia. | Bezabih, T (2007) Socio-economic impact of self help groups. Graduate school of social work, Addis Ababa University, Ethiopia. | | | Emily, E, Shirini, H & Chris, H 2006, women’s empowerment an annotated bibliography, Institute of Development Studies, Brighton, UK. | Emily, E, Shirini, H & Chris, H (2006) women’s empowerment an annotated bibliography. Institute of Development Studies, Brighton, UK. | | | Femida, H & Meenaz, K 2004, Women’s empowerment in rural India, Paper presented as the ISTR conference, Toronto, Canada. | Femida, H & Meenaz, K (2004) Women’s empowerment in rural India. Paper presented as the ISTR conference, Toronto, Canada. | | | Muleta, S 2008, The implication of microfinance on empowering women and sustainable livelihood, Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. | Muleta, S (2008) The implication of microfinance on empowering women and sustainable livelihood. Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. | | | Meron, H 2007, The role of microfinance in empowering women, Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. | Meron, (H 2007) The role of microfinance in empowering women. Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. | | | MOFED 2010, Ethiopia 2010 MDG’s report, trends and prospects for meeting MDG’s by 2015, Federal democratic republic of Ethiopia, Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. | MOFED (2010) Ethiopia 2010 MDG’s report, trends and prospects for meeting MDG’s by 2015.Federal democratic republic of Ethiopia, Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. | | | Muleta, S 2008, The implication of microfinance on empowering women and sustainable livelihood, Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. | Muleta, S (2008) The implication of microfinance on empowering women and sustainable livelihood. Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. | | | Rahel, W & Issac, P 2010, Growth Determinants of Women-Operated Micro and Small Enterprises in Addis Ababa, Journal of Sustainable Development in Africa (Volume 12, No.6, 2010) ISSN: 1520-5509, Institute of regional and local development studies, Addis Ababa university, Ethiopia. | Rahel, W & Issac, P (2010) 'Growth Determinants of Women-Operated Micro and Small Enterprises in Addis Ababa'. Journal of Sustainable Development in Africa 12(6) | 2 authors but referenced in the body of the text as one author | | Benyam, A 2008, Financial and Operating Performance of Women operated Micro and Small Enterprises Organized Under WISE, School of graduate studies of Addis Ababa University Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. | Benyam, A (2008) Financial and Operating Performance of Women operated Micro and Small Enterprises Organized Under WISE. School of graduate studies of Addis Ababa University Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. | | | Eshetu, B & Zeleke, W 2008, Women Entrepreneurship in Micro, Small and Medium Enterprises: The Case of Ethiopia, journal of international women’s studies Vol. 10 #2. | Eshetu, B and Zeleke, W (2008) Women Entrepreneurship in Micro, Small and Medium Enterprises: The Case of Ethiopia. Journal of international women’s studies Vol. 10 #2. | | | Deepti, U 2006, women’s empowerment effect of participation in self help groups, Indian institute of management, Bangalore. | Deepti, U (2006) women’s empowerment effect of participation in self help groups. Indian institute of management, Bangalore. | | | Wabekbon development consultant plc 2006, Country gender profile, Ethiopia. | Wabekbon development consultant plc (2006) Country gender profile. Ethiopia. | | | Bezabih, T 2007, Socio-economic impact of self help groups, Graduate school of social work, Addis Ababa University, Ethiopia. | Bezabih, T (2007) Socio-economic impact of self help groups. Graduate school of social work, Addis Ababa University, Ethiopia. | | | Yeshiareg, D 2007, Women’s Economic Empowerment for Poverty Reduction and Economic Growth, draft | Yeshiareg, D (2007) Women’s Economic Empowerment for Poverty Reduction and Economic Growth. Draft………… | incomplete referencing |

Table 11. Chapter one referencing problems with correction

S/N | How it is written | How it should be written | 1 | Alice, J 2001, Gender and Urban Agriculture: Emerging Trends and Areas for Future Research, department of Geography – university of Guelph, Canada, CTA, Wageningen. | Alice, J (2001) Gender and Urban Agriculture: Emerging Trends and Areas for Future Research. Department of Geography: university of Guelph, Canada, CTA, Wageningen. | 2 | Beijing, 1995, Beijing declaration and platform for action fourth world conference on women. | Beijing (1995) declaration and platform for action fourth world conference on women. Beijing | 3 | Benyam, A 2008, Financial and Operating Performance of Women operated Micro and Small Enterprises Organized Under WISE, School of graduate studies of Addis Ababa University Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. | Benyam, A (2008) Financial and Operating Performance of Women operated Micro and Small Enterprises Organized Under WISE. Addis Ababa: School of graduate studies of Addis Ababa University. | 4 | Bezabih, T 2007, Socio-economic impact of self help groups, Graduate school of social work, Addis Ababa University, Ethiopia. | Bezabih, T (2007) Socio-economic impact of self help groups. Ethiopia: Graduate school of social work, Addis Ababa University. | 5 | Daman, P 2003, Rural women, food security and agricultural cooperatives, rural development and management Centre, New Delhi 110019, India. | Daman, P (2003) Rural women, food Security and agricultural cooperative. Rural development and management Centre: New Delhi 110019, India. | 6 | Ester, E 2008, Achieving gender equality in cooperatives for sustainable development, Nigeria cooperative women alliance Nivowa at the 8th ICA regional assembly, Abuja. | Ester, E (2008) Achieving gender equality in cooperatives for sustainable development. Abuja: Nigeria cooperative women alliance Nivowa. | 7 | Emily, E, Shirini, H & Chris, H 2006, women’s empowerment an annotated bibliography, Institute of Development Studies, Brighton, UK. | Emily, Shirini et al. (2006) Women’s empowerment an annotated bibliography. Brighton: Institute of Development Studies. | 8 | Endalkachew, M 2008, Underlying Causes of Micro and Small Business Failures in Addis Ketema Sub City, for the partial fulfillment of masters degree in Accounting and Finance, Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. | Endalkachew, M (2008) Underlying Causes of Micro and Small Business Failures in Addis Ketema Sub City: For the partial fulfillment of masters degree in Accounting and Finance. Addis Ababa. | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |
DAGI
Chapter three
NO
It is also seen that the following sources are used in the proposal but not found in the list of references. Correction is also made.
Table 12 not found references S/N | Wrongly written cites | How it should be | Where | Chapter 1 | | * | World Bank (2001) | Paragraph two | | (Haimanot 2007) | (Haimanot, 2007) | Paragraph four | | (Annika & Catharina 2009) | (Annika and Catharina, 2009) | Paragraph five | | (Anjali 2007) | (Anjali ,2007) | Paragraph three | Chapter 2 | 1 | (Buzzanell 1994) | (Buzzanell, 1994). | Page 8 , Paragraph 1 | 2 | (United Nations 2001) | (United Nations, 2001). | Page 9 Paragraph 2 | 3 | (Oxaal and Baden 1997) | (Oxaal and Baden,1997) | Page 9 Paragraph 4 | 4 | (Zafar 2002) | (Zafar,2002) | Page 10 Paragraph 2 | 6 | (Annika & Catharina 2009) | (Annika and Catharina,2009) | Page 11 Paragraph 4 | 7 | (Annika & Catharina 2009 p9. | Annika & Catharina (2009) | Page 12 Paragraph 1 | 8 | (Elsebeth et al 2009) | Elsebeth et al.( 2009). | Page 12 Paragraph 2 | 9 | (UNDP 1996: 168 in Mohamed 2002) | UNDP,1996,cited in Mohamed, 2002 | Page 13 Paragraph 5 | 10 | (Belay 2011) | (Belay,2011) | Page 14 Paragraph 1, Page 16 Paragraph 1, Page 16 Paragraph 2, Page 16 Paragraph 4 | 11 | (Peace 2002) | (Peace,2002) | Page 15 Paragraph 2 | 12 | (Nivedita 2010) | (Nivedita,2010) | Page 15 Paragraph 4, Page 16 Paragraph 3 | 13 | (Anjali 2007) | (Anjali,2007) | Page 17 Paragraph 4 | 14 | (Grown et al, 2005) | Grown et al. (2005) | Page 20 Paragraph 2 | 15 | (MOFED 2003) | (MOFED,2003) | Page 20 Paragraph 3, Page 22 Paragraph 1 | 16 | (World Bank 1998) | (World Bank,1998) | Page 21 Paragraph 1 | 17 | (MOWA) 2006) | (MOWA,2006) | Page 21 Paragraph 1 | 18 | (bureau of plan and finance 2003) | (bureau of plan and finance,2003) | Page 21 Paragraph 3, Page 22 Paragraph 2 | 19 | (Stevenson and St-Onage: 2005:11) | (Stevenson and St-Onage,2005) | Page 22 Paragraph 5 | Chapter 3 | | (Aynalem 2008) | (Aynalem, 2008) | paragraph One | | (Negasi 2010) | (Negasi, 2010) | paragraph Two | | (Wukro MSE office) | (Wukro, MSE, office) | paragraph Three | | (Weinreich 2006 cited in Abreham 2010) | (Weinreich, 2006, cited in Abreham, 2010) | paragraph Six |

Spelling and Punctuation
There are some spelling and punctuation errors also as listed below;
Page 7, paragraph 3 line 6 and Page 8, paragraph 2 line 2 – “…where as…” should be ‘‘whereas’’.
Page 8, paragraph 3 line 3 -“… them selves…” should be ‘’themselves’’ and in line 5 “…there fore…” should be ‘‘therefore’’.
Page 8 paragraph 3: no comma is needed in the first line of the paragraph. i.e.”Socialist feminists are concerned with, global women’s…” should be written as ”Socialist feminists are concerned with global women’s…”
Page 22 paragraph 1 line 3 -“… the house hold…” should be ‘‘… the household…’’
Page 22 paragraph 2 line 1 -“In Ethiopia MSE’s are…” should be ‘‘In Ethiopia, MSE’s are …’’
Page 26 Paragraph 2 line 3 - “…these..” should be “…this..”
Page 26 Paragraph 3 line 3 “…there fore” should be “…therefore…”
Grammatical presentation and terminology;
A statement on page 7 paragraph 3 line 4 “In line with this, the above two approaches are unable to ensure women’s empowerment…” is not correct grammatically because when we say ‘in line with this’ it represents the positive impacts of a given phenomenon however, the statement negates the results of a given phenomenon.
In the last statement of the theoretical framework section instead of saying”Both the liberal and multicultural feminist views indirectly neglect economic issues, therefore so long as this is the case the stand for this study will be towards socialist feminists view” it can be better expanded and explain our framework conclusion by saying ‘’As briefly mentioned above, the liberal and multicultural feminists view overlook the economic aspects of gender hierarchy which demonstrates women empowerment. Hence, since the basic objective of the study revolves around the economic empowerment of women we focus on the views of the Socialist feminists.’’
Paragraph flow
Under literature review chapter it would be more descriptive and appropriate if paragraph 4 and 5 are switched as Paragraph 5 mainly discusses the overall concepts of empowerment in general whereas paragraph 4 is more of specific and is about women economic empowerment.
Summary Critics * Logical flow and organization of contents: the proposal specifically the literature review section flow is appreciated with fairly appropriate breadth and depth except the fact that some major topics are not included. * We have noticed big inconsistency on citations. * Variety of resource: by and large researcher tried to her capacity to read and incorporate different literatures, enterprise structures, policies etc. and other related documentations which can support and frame the variables of defined research problem under the topic. Nevertheless, researcher only refers to very few resources in the theoretical framework of the literature review. Only four literatures are used to frame the wide range of variables. * References – Primary or secondary sources/references are used * Operational definitions of the independent and dependent variables – do they reflect the conceptual definitions: * Plagiarism - unquoted statement of a literature review on page 15 * Grammatical, spelling and punctuation errors are also noticed in this proposal