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Benchmark Assignment
Interpersonal Communication

You wouldn’t think it, but as individuals, communication is the most complex activity that we can perform. When you think about it, communication is really a skill that we acquire and develop over time. Some individuals over time become proficient in communication, while others may not fare so well we have to remember that interpersonal communication is a part of knowing our self, our perception of others, how we handles our emotions, and remembering that our gender and culture play a part of how we communicate.
Interpersonal communication is necessary in maintaining healthy interpersonal relationships with the individuals we communicate with, especially the ones we care about the most. The way we speak, act in conversations, and convey our messages to the people we surround ourselves with plays great deal on how who we are has a person. When you are using interpersonal communication you are using a dynamic form of communication in which you are exchanging messages and information that can influence thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and relationships between one another. We communicate in many different ways such as emails, telephone calls, text, or by letters and we have to remember how our tone might come across. For myself, I like to text a lot and I have to remember think about what type of message I am trying to convey. They are been times when I have sent a text just to have it misconstrued. So now I have revaluated myself ever now and then, I have revaluated in how I communicate when it comes to texting.
When we are born, we are born without a sense of our self, but as we grow we gradually develop a sense of our self. By exploring our self, we are seeking to describe what essential qualities make up our uniqueness and our essential being as an individual. Self is also defining what is most important to you as an individual, such as personal beliefs, one’s culture, how you view yourself, and how you view others that you choose to surround yourself with. After defining what is most important to our self, you have then gained self concept, self awareness, and self esteem. The most important thing to remember is that as individuals we are ever evolving, which means throughout our lifetime we will reevaluate our self and who we are.
There has been many times throughout my twenty seven years of life, that I have had to find my own self and reevaluate myself. I may have not known what I was doing when I was doing this, but I can now look back at my yester years and realize the change in myself. I am not the person I was at twenty one, eighteen, sixteen, I’m not even the person I was a year ago. I can recall that for many years I would tell my family and friends that I was not going to have children because being a parent wasn’t for me and I didn’t want another person depending on me. Course when I found out that I was pregnant with my daughter that all changed and I started reevaluating myself and what everything meant to me. Every year I have experienced something new that has added to the change of my personal self, how I view things, and how I perceive others.
When we first meet someone for the first time we start to develop an impression of this person which is perception of others. Our perception of others is based on the information that is given to us by this new acquaintance. The process of perception starts by listening to what information is given to us, selecting information that is surrounding us and focusing our attention on what we take out of the conversation and our environment, you begin to organize the information that you have chosen to focus your attention on, and then you begin to interpret the information in order to give personal meaning to what the person is conveying to you and what you are receiving out of the conversation.
“It is said that your perception of others reveals so much about your own personality.” (Dustin Woods, professor of psychology at Wake Forest University and lead author of the study in Science Daily.) This statement is very true. When we perceive people in a positive light it shows that we are more satisfied in our own lives and we can view others more positively. The same can be said about making negative perceptions about our peers. Our negative traits begin to show. There has been many times when I was at work, when I did have a job, and I would hear people just complaining about things. These people were habitual complainers, it seemed that’s all they ever did. I would think to myself, “Goodness, I’m sure if you stopped complaining, then things might change for you.” I do have to admit that I to have had my complaints about things, but you state your complaint and move on from it. If you dwelling on negative things can cause you to have negative emotions about yourself and others.
Emotions play a huge part in our interpersonal communication skills, from reflecting on our self, how we perceive others, and how we choose to use and show our them. Our emotions are tense reactions that help us operate on many different levels. Emotions have physical aspects as well as psychological aspects that help us with our thoughts, feelings, and actions. Emotions are so many different things to different people. They are feelings that many people experience in different ranges, psychological arousal that helps express or display somatic and autonomic responses which also helps us determine what actions you will take when dealing with emotions.
Has humans we are driven by our emotions and the events in our lives that have helped shape how we feel about things and we might act about them. There has been many times where I have been faced with situations where I was either anger, sad, or happy and I had to figure out what way I was going to act. I think back to the time when my daughter accidently broke a bottle of my finger nail polish on the bathroom floor. It looked like she purposely threw the bottle on the floor as hard as she could because it was everywhere! I knew it was an accident and I was actually surprised by myself because I was the more upset one and her father was the more calm and understanding one. This was the first, the gender roles were reversed in this situation.
A big component of interpersonal communication is gender and culture. From a very young age we are taught the differences between male’s and female’s and what is expected from each one. We are exposed to many different types of genders roles, especially in many different cultures. Gender roles can be defined by many different things such as our beliefs, behaviors, characteristics, and attitudes that many members of a society expect from either males and females. Different cultures impose expectations on men and women who live in their culture. Some cultures find completely expectable for the men to be the bread winner and make all the financial decision about the family, while the women takes care of the household duties and children. In some cultures this is ok vice versa. Another big thing is that in many cultures men are seen stern, unemotional, stable individuals while women are looked at being irrational, emotional, unstable individuals. At the same time though our Country has been revising how we view cross culture and gender roles.
Just like our self, we are ever revolving as individuals and seeing and in our cultures.
Communication involves having a sense of our personal self, a well rounded perception of others, and a sense of our emotions and how we may react to situations. Without these communication skills we can send mix signals and our relationships would be comprised. So learning about interpersonal communication, how we can become more proficient in it, and how we can apply it says a lot about a person.

Work Cited Page

"Cross-Cultural Gender Differences." Cross-Cultural Gender Differences. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 June 2012. <http://www-student.unl.edu/cis/soci101w04/online_course/unit2/lsn07-tp02.html>.
"Definition: Interpersonal Communication." Definition: Interpersonal Communication. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 June 2012. <http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Definition_Interpersonal_Communication.html>.
"Emotions – How To Understand, Identify and Release Your Emotions." Emotions – How To Understand, Identify and Release Your Emotions. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 June 2012. <http://www.mkprojects.com/fa_emotions.html>.
"Feeling Our Emotions: Scientific American." Feeling Our Emotions: Scientific American. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 June 2012. <http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=feeling-our-emotions>.
"Health." Gender Roles, Information about Gender Roles. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 June 2012. <http://www.faqs.org/health/topics/8/Gender-roles.html>.
<http://wps.ablongman.com/ab_devito_intrprsnl_10/9/2354/602806.cw/index.html%20parentloc
"Interpersonal Communication." Interpersonal Communication. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 June 2012. <http://www.lcc.gatech.edu/~herrington/gcp/Ethnology/interpersonal_ethn.htm>.
"Person Perception." About.com Psychology. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 June 2012. <http://psychology.about.com/od/socialpsychology/a/person-perception.htm>.
"Self." Wikipedia. Wikimedia Foundation, 22 June 2012. Web. 20 June 2012. <http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self>.
"The Self in Interpersonal Communication." The Self in Interpersonal Communication.
"ThinkQuest : 404." ThinkQuest. Oracle Foundation, n.d. Web. 20 June 2012. <http://library.thinkquest.org/26618/en-1.4.1=What%20are%20emotions.htm>.
"Your Perception Of Others Is Also Your Reflection." Tonic – Inspiring News Stories & Social Good. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 June 2012. <http://www.tonic.com/post/your-perception-of-others-is-also-your-reflection/>.
"What You Say About Others Says a Lot About You, Research Shows." ScienceDaily. ScienceDaily, 02 Aug. 2010. Web. 20 June 2012. <http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/08/100802165441.htm>.

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