In the first revision I would have made a note to change the conclusion. I don’t think that the conclusion that was presented at the end of this paper was a good ending to it. I think I would have at least added a little more support to the conclusion to help end it with a bang. When I read this piece of writing I thought that the author could have used more support in his writing. I think I would have to add a little more support as to what made the movie darker than the previous Batman movies, so if the audience hadn’t seen any of those movies, they could hopefully see what I was talking about. I also think that there needs to be a little bit more about how the actors and actresses showed off their acting abilities. Andy kind of leaves it open and leaves the audience wondering what is different about this movie and what makes it so much better than the others in the past. He doesn’t give a lot of detail that I think should have been used to keep the audience drawn in and to help them see why this movie was so great. I also think that I would fix any miss spelling and punctuation errors in this first revision. Now that I have read it once and made some changes, I think here is where I would want to have a peer read my work.

Looking over the changes requested in the Appendix D I would have made the misspelling changes and the simple grammar errors without a second though. Making the changes that included double spacing, including a header, and fixing the conclusion are things that I would have hopefully had corrected with my first revision. There were a few notes of feedback that included replacing pronoun with specific words, to help the reader understand better and I thought that made sense. I was a little confused when I reread the paper with that thought running in my mind. There was also a feedback note that pointed out there was an error with APA