Coming back home after a long and exhausting day at school, the one thing I desire is peace and quiet. I lay there, still in my bed. The only movement is in my wrists from the swift flicking of pages of the book ‘Twenties Girl’ written by Sophie Kinsella. The amity is so divine, so serene, so heavenly and tranquil. If anything could be as close to heaven, this would be it…. BRING! BRING! BRING! BRING! Suddenly the dream I considered reality, was viciously awoken by the sound of the ear-splitting entry phone. OH GOD! What I was dreading the most has finally arrived at my doorstep!
I know you are thinking “Who’s at the door? A crazy old women? A mental asylum patient? A serial killer?!” But no. None of those. Unfortunately, it’s worse!
My infuriating little cousin.
I guess dear listeners, that by now you’ve figured what my topic is. Yes. Annoying children.
You may think that I am a stone hearted, droning, inconsiderate teenager rambling on about annoying children. But the fact of the matter is that if there is one thing that I absolutely cannot tolerate, it is my peace being destructed by these aggravating, bothersome, petty children, and especially then, when there is a multitude of them.
It’s been about three weeks now, since these rebellious guests attacked the harmony from within my peaceful home, which has thankfully, now been restored after the departure of these insolent beings. I was in my room, trying to concentrate on reading my book in peace and it felt impossible at this stage, due to the continuous screaming persistently going on in the background. Suddenly, I see from the corner of my eye, a little girl, busting my bedroom door open (as if it were her own), rampaging into my room and sliding my wardrobe open. I just stared. I stared in shock, in horror, in disbelief. Infuriated, I edged towards her. My eyes looked as if they were going to pop out of my eye socket any minute! And… she ran away. Which sane being would look through another person’s belongings? Have you ever heard of the word privacy? Manners? This is the reason why I loathe children. They have no respect for others. They don’t understand what privacy and personal space means. And what more can you do to make them understand the importance of it? I doubt that their IQ of zero will allow them to sync any information through to their pea-sized brains.
But what’s more is that children from this unbelievably, uncouth generation are getting too big for their boots. They deserve a scare. To make them understand that it’s NOT ok to be disrespectful and impertinent. But what more can you possibly do? Shouting and telling them off is definitely not the solution. Believe me. Been there. Done that. The only outcome of that would be of them either crying buckets of tears – making it an even bigger deal than what it initially was, or throwing a pointless tantrum – wasting valuable time that no one has for these ungrateful creatures. So why take the risk of even trying to explain to them?

I remember about three years ago, I was travelling on a plane to Bangladesh. This form of transport is considered to be full of concord and serenity. However, this experience entirely changed the meaning of travel. Can you imagine a relaxing, calm environment? Everyone laid back in their own seats, everyone minding their own business, some people just gazing into the remarkable view outside, some just sitting there reading a magazine, some letting their souls escape into the world of music…. UNTIL!!!! The strident wailing of a baby pierces everyone’s ears. Every single passenger on that aeroplane turned their head in unison to look in the direction that this dreadful, echoing noise was coming from. The deafening vibration continued as another baby screamed, emulating the previous one, almost as if roaring like a tiger, in synchronisation, hungry for its prey. The horrendous feeling of your ear drums being physically ripped apart from within the internal system. This is as far as excruciating pain gets. The finest, affordable form of transport? Yep. Airlines, you sure got that right. Children should be prohibited from setting foot on an aeroplane! But unfortunately they’re not. Can life seriously get any worse?
Someone once told me that one should never use that expression. Because it always does get worse! Of course there’s more to these depraved, ferocious creatures! These monstrous beings are despicably evil in every situation you can possibly think of! And who’s responsible? Parents of course! By providing unnecessary amounts of nurture and fulfilling their every wish before it is even desired by the child! Parents have no sense of discipline. What has happened to the sanity of parenthood?!
On Monday, I was on the typical red London bus, making my way home from school. Cautiously, I walked down the aisle and once I found a suitable place, I held onto the pole like an ordinary person would. As the bus started, I looked into the distance with desperation in getting home as it was raining cats and dogs! Abruptly, my gaze lowered to the seat in front of me. There was a child, about four years old, picking his nose! I was disgusted by the sight but my eyes wouldn’t move from the scene, no matter how forcefully I tried. I continued to watch him flicking the gooey pieces all over the bus and then….after he finished playing with the revolting, repellent, repulsive thing, he wiped his fingers on the seat! Why are these children so unhygienic?! Do they not acquire knowledge on this subject? Are they blind eyed to such concepts? Yes they are children. Yes they do not understand such things. But at least the parents could TRY to make them understand. INTRODUCE THEM TO THE INCREDIBLE INVENTION OF TISSUES! Now there’s a solution.
Children are indecorous, ill-mannered and disobedient. They completely lack in showing respect for others. They need to be taught or even trained about certain aspects of life! Any rational person would get infuriated by these miniature monsters. Those who do not are simply insane. How can you put up with a child for even five minutes?! Some idiotic parents would say their child deserves to live their childhood. Of course they do! But not like this. All I want is tranquillity and even that is taken away from me?! Is that too much to ask for in this fanatical world of extremist kids? What other upcoming surprises does the future hold for us? What other ways are these minions planning to intrigue us with? Children. Narcissistic, obnoxious, little brats. The lot of them.