Dear Alice,
For the last year or so, I haven't been able to cry anymore. And when I do, absolutely no tears come out. My eyes just water up, but there are no tears. Is this normal? Should I be worried?
—Confused
Dear Confused,
Crying as an emotional response (rather than to clear out debris and moisten the eyes) is a uniquely human phenomenon. Some evolutionary biologists think this function developed as a distress call of sorts. Human beings can "fake" all other emotions, but crying is more likely to be reflective of genuine emotion. Tears often stimulate a nurturing response in others, which, for a creature as socially interdependent as people are, can be a key to survival. Tears are also necessary for the lubrication and nourishment of our eyes, and they protect our eyes from infection.
So what's going on when someone can't cry? There are a few possible explanations. You mentioned that your eyes water up, but there are no tears. It’s possible that your tears are evaporating too fast. Environmental conditions like smoke, wind, and dry climates can make tears evaporate more quickly than normal. When a person isn’t producing enough tears or has poor quality tears, he or she may be suffering from dry eye syndrome.
This condition, known as keratoconjunctivitis sicca, can be the result of many factors. Experiencing dry eyes is actually a natural part of the aging process and most people over 65 show signs of dry eye syndrome at some point. Women are more likely to develop dry eye syndrome because of hormonal changes from pregnancy, use of oral contraceptives, and menopause. For both men and women, research has shown that certain types of medications, such as antidepressants and antihistamines, can sometimes lead to dry eyes. In addition, people with certain health conditions, such as diabetes and rheumatoid arthritis, are often more prone to dry eyes. Other causes can include the use of contact lenses and certain refractive eye surgeries such as LASIK. All of the above factors can lead to reduced tear production, which can then lead to dry eyes.
Another potential cause of tearlessness is a condition known as Sjögren's syndrome. This is an autoimmune disease in which the body's white blood cells attack moisture-producing glands like tear ducts. What causes Sjögren's is unclear, but it occurs most commonly in women over 40 and onset is usually triggered by a major bacterial or viral infection. Symptoms can include dry and itchy eyes, dry mouth, dry skin, arthritis, and fatigue. While there is no cure for Sjögren's, it is manageable. If you notice any of the symptoms mentioned, you’ll probably want to consult a health professional as soon as possible. The syndrome can put you at risk for more serious conditions such as chronic yeast infections and liver problems.
Before visiting a health care provider, you might want to make a list of any symptoms in addition to lack of tears that you may be experiencing. You mentioned that not being able to cry is a recent change. Have you noticed other changes along with the decrease in tear production? Have your eyes felt dry in general? Have you experienced dry mouth in addition to tearlessness? Have you experienced a shift in your emotional state? These are all questions a health care provider might ask you when attempting to figure out what's going on. Making an appointment to address these concerns may be your best bet in this situation. If you’re a Columbia student, you can make an appointment at Medical Services (Morningside) or the Student Health Service (CUMC).
Best of luck unraveling the mystery of your tearless peepers!

How to Cry and Let It All Out * 344,000 views * Edited by Limestar and 57 others * Edited 5 days ago
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Three Parts:Feeling Comfortable With CryingLetting the Tears FlowUsing Tearjerkers to Help You Cry
How long has it been since you last had a good, hard cry? Crying actually makes you feel better right away, because it's your body's method of releasing stress. But if you've gone months or years without crying, it can be hard to remember how to start. Going to a quiet place, freeing yourself from distractions and letting yourself deeply feel emotions will put you in the right state of mind. See Step 1 and beyond to learn techniques that will help your tears flow freely.
Part 1 of 3: Feeling Comfortable With Crying 1. -------------------------------------------------

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Forget what you learned about crying. Were you taught that brave people don't cry? Many people who were raised to hold it all inside have a lot of trouble expressing emotions as adults. But crying is a necessary part of life that actually fosters good mental health. Crying can be an expression of sadness, pain, fear, joy, or just pure emotion, and it's a natural, healthy way to let those emotions run through our bodies. * Men tend to have more trouble letting it all out than women do, primarily because men are taught to keep their emotions to themselves. But crying is just as natural for men as it is for women, even if they do it less often. Girls and boys cry the same amount until they reach age 12.[1] When they become adults, men cry 7 times a year on average, while women cry 47 times a year.[2] * Crying is in no way a sign of weakness. It's an expression of emotion that has nothing to do with decision making. You can still take brave actions, even if you cry in anticipation. In fact, crying could help you process the emotions you're feeling and think more clearly about what's ahead. * Crying is not for babies, contrary to what you might have heard. Children are more likely to cry because they have not yet internalized the idea that there's something wrong with it. But the need to cry does not go away when you grow up.
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See the benefits of crying. Crying is a way that humans release emotional tension. It's a natural bodily function that happens as a result of emotions building up and needing to be let out.[3] Interestingly, humans are the only mammals that produce tears as a way to express emotion. Crying is actually a survival mechanism that helps us in the following ways: * It relieves stress and lowers blood pressure. Over time intense stress and high blood pressure can lead to severe medical problems, and crying helps to mitigate these issues. * It's a way to remove toxins that build up when you're upset. Certain chemicals build up in your system when you're stressed, and crying helps to expel them through tears - especially emotional tears, as opposed to tears formed as a result of irritation.[4] * It boosts your mood immediately afterward. This isn't just in people's heads - it's a scientific fact. When you cry, your level of manganese gets lower. The buildup of manganese leads to stress and anxiety, so crying is nature's way of easing emotional pain.[5] 2. -------------------------------------------------

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Figure out why you hold it all in. Now that you know all the good things that come about when you cry, think about what might be stopping your own tears from flowing. If it has been a long time since you've been able to cry, you may need to make a conscious effort to get to the point where you can release your emotions through tears. * Do you harbor negative thoughts about crying? If so, try to change your views and see that there's nothing wrong with crying - it's good for you. * Do you have trouble expressing feelings in general? Allowing yourself to cry will be a good start for you. Being able to process emotions in this way will help you be more emotional in general. * When you push your feelings down and keep yourself from crying, those feelings don't go away. You may feel either angry or numb. 3. -------------------------------------------------

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Give yourself permission. Letting yourself cry is a way to take better care of yourself. It's a way to honor your feelings instead of denying them and pushing them down. When you cry, you're allowing yourself to be you. Giving yourself this emotional freedom will have a positive effect on your mental health.[6] * If you're struggling to allow yourself to express emotion, imagine yourself as a child. Think about how you were free to be yourself then, crying when you felt sad that a fun day had to end, or when you fell off of your bike and scraped your knees. The events that make you cry as an adult will be different from those made you burst into tears as a child, but you can still try to recapture that sense of emotional freedom. * It might also help to think about how you treat others when they cry. Do you tell them to stop, to hold it in? When your best friend feels overcome and starts crying, you probably give her a hug and encourage her to let it all out. Treating yourself with the same kindness, rather than self-censuring, could help you feel comfortable enough to cry.
Part 2 of 3: Letting the Tears Flow 1. -------------------------------------------------

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Find a good place to cry. Most people who have trouble letting themselves cry prefer to experience their emotions alone, away from others. It can be easier to let yourself truly experience your feelings when you aren't worried about what someone else is thinking. There's certainly nothing wrong with crying in front of others, but you might find it more relaxing to be by yourself at first. * Your bedroom might be a good choice, if it's a private, quiet place. * If your house has a lot of other people in it, try driving somewhere private so you can cry in the car. * You can also cry in the shower - no one will hear you there. * Being outside might help you free up your mind to process emotions. Look for a private spot in the park or on the beach. 1. -------------------------------------------------

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Clear your head of distractions. Many people push their feelings aside and bury themselves in distractions to keep from crying. This technique is so effective that it can result in going months or years without crying. At the first sign of sadness, do you tend to turn on the TV and spend the evening laughing at your favorite show? Next time you start feeling down, resist that impulse and allow yourself to feel the emotion. It's the first step to having a good, hard cry. * There are many other types of distractions. You might stay late at work every night, spend all your time going out instead of being alone, or read articles online until you fall asleep. Think about what you tend to do when you're not in the mood to feel emotional, and make the decision to stop and focus on your emotions. 2. -------------------------------------------------

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Think deeply about what's making you sad. Instead of letting your thoughts skip away to something less important, focus on your mind on the main emotions swirling around in your head. Just let yourself think them through instead of trying to push them away. * If you're sad, think hard about the event that brought about these feelings. Think about how much you wish it hadn't happened, what your life was like before, what your life will be like from now on. Let yourself understand and feel the loss of what might have been. * No matter what strong emotion is causing you to want to cry, think it through and allow it to take a prominent spot in your brain. Observe how much it's stressing you out, and what a relief it would be if the problem would just go away. 3. -------------------------------------------------

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Let your emotions swell until you cry. Are you starting to feel your throat tighten a little? Don't swallow and force yourself to stop thinking about what's making you sad. Instead, let your emotions overcome you. Keep thinking about what you wish hadn't happened. When the tears start to flow, don't resist them. * Once you start really crying, it'll probably be hard to stop. Keep crying until you've "let it all out" - you'll know when you're done. * The average length of a bout of crying is 6 minutes.[7] 4. -------------------------------------------------

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Feel better. When you're finished crying, think about how you feel. If you're like most people, you'll find that your brain feels a bit freer of the emotion that was bogging you down. You might not feel joyful right away, but you probably feel calmer, less anxious and ready to take on your problems. Hold onto that feeling, and get into the habit of crying when you want to. It'll get easier with practice. * According to one study, 85% of women report feeling better after crying, while 73% of men do.[8] * If you don't feel good after crying, consider why. It can be hard to shake off years of being told that crying is weak, and so on. If you're embarrassed that you cried, try to remember that it's completely natural and healthy.
Part 3 of 3: Using Tearjerkers to Help You Cry 1. -------------------------------------------------

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Look at old pictures. This is a surefire way to get the tears flowing if you're sad about a particular person, your family, or how much life has changed. Go through an old photo album or pull up pictures online and allow yourself to gaze at each one for as long as you want. Remember the good times you had with the people in the pictures, or how much you loved a particular place. 2. -------------------------------------------------

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Watch a sad movie. It can be very cathartic to watch a movie with a plot so sad it makes you cry. Even if the actors are in a situation completely different from yours, watching them go through sad times and cry themselves might help turn on your tears. When you do start crying during a movie, let your thoughts turn to your situation, so you can process your feelings about your own life. If you need suggestions for a sad movie to watch, try these: * Steel Magnolias * Stella Dallas * Breaking the Waves * Blue Valentine * Rudy * The Green Mile * Schindler's List * Titanic * The Boy in the Striped Pajamas * My Girl 1. -------------------------------------------------

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Listen to emotional music. The right music can be the perfect way to help your emotions loom larger in your brain. One of the best ways to use music to help you cry is to pick an album or song you listened to at a different time in your life, or one that reminds you strongly of someone who is gone. If there's no particular song or artist who fits the bill, try one of these extremely sad songs: * "I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry" - Hank Williams * "Hurt" - Johnny Cash * "Tears in Heaven" - Eric Clapton * "On My Own" - Les Misérables * "Jolene'" - Dolly Parton * "I've Been Loving You Too Long" - Otis Redding 2. -------------------------------------------------

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Write down your feelings. Put a pen to paper and try to capture the essence of your feelings. You can start by writing down a description of the source of your emotions. Describe the ins and outs of your breakup, discuss the last few months of your father's illness, write about how you lost your job at the start of the recession. Then go deeper and write about how that event has changed your life, and what you're feeling as a result. Writing down memories is also a good way to bring yourself to the point of tears. 3. -------------------------------------------------

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Talk with a friend if you'd like. It can really help to talk to someone else about what made you sad, angry, or overwhelmed. Discuss your feelings until you have nothing left to talk about or cry about.
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* Take a bottle of water and plenty of tissues with you, as you probably will need both. * If you need to cry at school, go somewhere as private as possible, such as under the bleachers, in the locker room (unless there is going to be a gym class), or the auditorium (unless there will be classes). The bathroom is over-dramatic; people might label you as a drama queen or someone who is looking for attention. The best time to do it would be at lunch. But if you feel you really need to let it out during class, ask if you can go to the bathroom. However, this way, your friend probably can't come with you. * If you are feeling down, get someone who is closest to you, a friend or family member, and tell them what's wrong. Just let it all out. Crying is not a weakness! * Don't tell people to "go away" when you're crying, let your friend do the talking. * If you have the time, do something afterward to make you feel happy again. * Know that there will always be a other day and people will forget you were crying. * There's nothing wrong with crying. It doesn't mean you're weak. Tears are a sign of strength. Remember this, "We don't fall apart, we fall together." * Crying does not show weakness. Since you were born, it has been a sign you are alive. * There's no reason to be embarrassed about crying, we all do it. * Talk to people about your emotions instead of bottling them up! They'd be happy to help you out.
How to Cry On the Spot * 1,277,000 views * Edited by Mrs.Jordison and 247 others * Edited 5 days ago
Sometimes life calls for crying even if you don't feel like doing so. Perhaps you're acting in a play on the stage or trying to be on television and need to know the main acting stuff or perhaps your BFF has really annoyed you and you'd like to break down to his/her defenses by crying. Whatever the reason is for summoning the tears, crying on the spot is possible when you follow these quick tips.
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Put yourself into a more emotional state of mind. What we think makes us is something we're often told; in the case of getting emotional, this is definitely valid. Try to think of something that makes you really sad. For example, think back to the loss of a beloved family member, friend or a pet, breakup with girl/boyfriend, attending a funeral, losing something you treasured or how it felt when you missed out on something you'd worked really hard to achieve. This will begin to put you in the right frame of mind for tears. * If you can't think of anything, think of someone you care about getting hurt. Never look back on a sad occasion that happened in your life. This could emotionally break you and you'd become a mess. Instead, think of something that could happen in the future, pretend one of your family members died or was injured, or remember a sad scene from a movie.
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Irritate your eyes. A common method for starting tears is to cause your eyes discomfort. Of course, be careful as to how you go about doing this, and be aware that some of these methods can hurt a little (which will probably really make you cry): * Hold your eyelids open with your fingers, stay like this for 2 minutes. * Try to expose your eyes to the air as much as possible. Keep your eyes open as long as you can. Don't close them until tears form under your eyes. Keeping your eyes open will dry them out, making them sting. Don't close your eyes when they start to hurt or no tears will form. * Cutting an unwashed onion is very effective in provoking tears. This method is probably best for plays though––it's a little difficult to bluff crying around someone you want to convince you're crying when you produce an onion and both of you start getting all teary! * Place your eyes next to a fan - looking into the airflow can make you cry. * Let your eyes relax. Then close your eyes and rub your eyelids for about 25 seconds. Open them and stare at something until the tears start rolling. You might not get it the first time but it works. Rubbing can leave your eyes sore but if done gently, it can help redden the complexion around your eye area. * Lightly place your pointed finger up to your one of your pupils. This will cause that eye to become irritated, and it may lead to tears. Be careful not to poke your eye out. * Gently rub just a tiny spot of Tiger Balm, mentholated petroleum jelly, or hand sanitizer under your eyes. It may sting, but it's going to be very realistic. Do not overdo this one and DO NOT get any IN your eyes. * Never rub your eyes with something hot like chili, hot pepper powders, curry powder, etc. or you will do more than cry for real; this can not only hurt intensely but may also cause injury to your eye. 2. -------------------------------------------------

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Bring other parts of your body into action. Doing things with other parts of your body can help to bring on tears. Some examples include: * Try yawning repeatedly. This may help to make your eyes water (especially if you're feeling a little tired). * Sometimes you can cry by breathing into the back of your throat rather than down your windpipe, this is how yawning can make you cry as well. Or it might just make you yawn! * Try pinching yourself hard in some sensitive parts of your body like the space between your thumb and pointer finger or under your eye and tears will automatically begin to flow down. * Bite the inside of your lip. Think about something that really upsets you, and stare. * Try holding your nose very tightly so you can't breathe through it. Then try to breathe through your nose. Tears might come. 3. -------------------------------------------------

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Make a crying face. This usually involves closing your eyes and scrunching your face up a little––simply imagine yourself through the motions through remembering what your face feels like when you do actually cry. * Turn the corners of your lips down a little. * Try to force the inner corners of your eyebrows upwards. * Wrinkle up your chin like people do right before they start bawling. This may look fake, so be careful. 4. -------------------------------------------------

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Focus on your breathing. The breathing is part of what convinces people that you're upset. Start sobbing by making crying noises and take deep breaths as your do so. Breathe in constantly as if you are hyperventilating; you can add little hiccuping noises too. * If nobody can see you, run on the spot for several minutes to cause yourself to be out of breath. If you can do this, it'll help to create the blotchy complexion often associated with crying. 5. -------------------------------------------------

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Use typical body movements associated with crying. Once you have the eyes tearing, the crying face and the hyper breathing going, add in a typical crying body stance. Some suggestions include: * Cover your face with your hands and lower your head. * Look away, trying to pretend you're not crying––the double bluff! * Bite your lip, as if you're trying hard to stop the tears. Wobbling your bottom lip really adds to the effect. Just make sure you don't look like you're faking it. * Rest your head on a table or other item in front of you in a gesture of hopelessness or attempt to self-compose. 6. -------------------------------------------------

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Be convincing. Think very hard about being sad. Make bubbling noises, and ramble on about the thing that has supposedly caused you to feel upset. In general, get emotionally carried away. The trick is to convince yourself that you're actually crying, as well as everyone else. This is basically "mind over matter" and the more you act it out, the more your body will acquiesce to produce the effect you're after. * When speaking, constrict your vocal cords. Aim to stutter your words and add in long intakes of breath to add to the effect. 7. -------------------------------------------------
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Laugh! Just burying your face in your hands and laughing can work. It can sometimes be hard to tell if someone is laughing or crying if they do it correctly. While your face is in your hands, try to make your eyes a little red by rubbing them hard with your hands in a fist form, otherwise it'll be too obvious. And don't smile when you take your hands away! This works best on a stage, when people are not close enough to see tears or your face in close detail. * Sometimes you can tear up from laughing, so perhaps try thinking of something funny or get a fellow funny actor to crack jokes around you just prior to filming or acting that scene. Make sure you look sad when the tears start flowing, though! * Some people laugh as a nervous or upset response. You may have noticed this in other people. You can mimic this display of emotion if faking crying is very difficult for you. 8. -------------------------------------------------
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Fight the tears instead. If you're having trouble getting yourself to cry, sometimes it's better to not cry, but to act like you're fighting back the tears––sometimes people are touched more by this, especially if you're usually a "tougher" soul. This can also be more believable, because it comes across as being more vulnerable. 9. -------------------------------------------------
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Don't sweat the stage. If you're going to be in a serious production, don't worry about having to produce your own tears. TV and film actors have the benefit of working with an entire crew of technicians and artists. Although some movie stars utilize some of the professional techniques many actors options for an easier solution. A menthol tear stick and menthol tear producers are the tool of the tv drama, film, theater trade etc. The stick version requires a sparse application under the eyes. The "tear producer" works as a spray. Both produce immediate results. 10. -------------------------------------------------

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Don't prolong the crying session. Since you're faking this, it won't have authentic emotions to keep fueling your crying. If you do end up making real tears, don't expect to keep making even more tears because your eyes will get tired after a while and won't be able to produce as many tears, especially lacking the emotion that can cause us to cry for a long time when something truly upsetting does happen. Wind it up quickly to give your eyes a break.
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* Don't be too rough when you irritate your eyes. It can lead to sore eyes for more than 1 hour. * Think of something that has previously made you cry. * Try crying along to a movie where the actor is crying, for practice. * First, rub your eyes (with clean hands!) then, just stare. Do not blink. The longer you hold it, the easier it is for you to cry tears. * Think of something really sad and/or picture a bad time. * Do not overly irritate your eyes. You could damage them if you are not careful. * Keep your eyes open for as long as you can, until they start to sting. When you blink, tears should start coming! * keep your eyes open very wide and try not to blink. This will help create tears. However, When staring to get tears, don't stare to hard or obviously as if it were a staring contest because the person you're talking to may be a little weirded out. * Don't make it too dramatic or obvious because whoever you are trying to convince may be suspicious. Make it seem like you do not want to be crying in front of them; appear a little embarrassed. Maybe even apologize for crying! * Look at sad images of the past.
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Yeah i'm gonna go with anxiety triggered psychosomatic events manifesting as the physical symptoms you named.

All those people who can control parts of their brains with concentration are not just 'turning it on or off' they are doing something, or thinking something, or focusing on an emotion or thought that triggers the automatic reaction in their bodies. Its like an actor who cannot 'make' themselves cry, but they can think about sad things which in turn causes them to cry for a scene.

You said you spent years trying to make peoples heads explode, I'm assuming you've prolly been the brunt of some harassment. People who spent a lot of time under constant low lvl stress can develop a huge number of little 'issues'. Most of the time they are just things we learn from, but occasionally the stress is manifested in a more significant way. You seem to just be able to actually bring out that stress and therefor your reaction to it, at will.

My suggestion is to talk to someone who actually knows what the hell is up with you ( a paid professional ) instead of just experimenting with things that could ultimately be more damaging to you then you realize. If your stressed on such a regular basis that you can induce a panic attack with little effort..you really ought to work on lowering your stress level.

Make no mistake, that is exactly what you are doing, ask anyone who sufferes from panic attacks, they will tell you their biggest enemy is themselves, they can EASILY trigger an attack in themselves if they really want to...but then...who actually WANTS to do that?

---------- Post added 2012-10-05 at 08:49 AM ----------
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Originally Posted by fizzbob
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you're just releasing adrenaline and it has side effects. i can do that too but it literally has no benefit whatsoever. it's how i used to get ready to fight or play in ball games and i'll probably have a heart attack at 40 because of it
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NO, he isn;t and no, you did not.

Clearly you don't know what adrenaline is, or does, or you would realize how silly it is to suggest you can voluntarily release it out of simple excitement or to 'get pumped up'.

Straight adrenaline is so potent that a single drop of the pure stuff would blow your heart up. Its CRAAAAZY strong so it isn't as if your body can just pump itself full of it every time it wants with no consequence. Adrenaline gets used very very sparingly, for emergency situations only. To say you were able to release it all the time at will would be analogous to saying 'i used to huff a pound of cocaine every morning just to wake up', its just silly and not accurate.

Also, saying it had no effect is all the evidence you need to realize your statement is incorrect. People who are under the influence of adrenaline rushes can do AMAZING things. The body tends to release adrenaline and endorphins, the endorphins cover the pain of the outrageous physical exertion that required the adrenaline release to save your life. In other words, your body has a tiny stock of super man juice. Our bodies aren't really capable of being super man all the time, those types of herculean activities tend to damage the body. However the body also has pain killers that let you beat the hell out of yourself doing things ( like lifting cars off people ) that you shouldn't be doing because its worth the risk of damage.

Now..were you able to lift cars and such every time you got pumped up for a game?
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Last edited by Wiyld; 2012-10-05 at 12:51 PM.
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Originally Posted by Gillern
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"IM LOOKING AT A THING I DONT LIKE, I HAVE THE OPTION TO GO AWAY FROM IT BUT I WILL LOOK MORE AND COMPLAIN ABOUT THE THING I DONT LIKE BECAUSE I DONT LIKE IT, NO ONE IS FORCING ME TO SEARCH FOR THIS THING OR LOOK AT THIS THING OR REMAIN LOOKING AT THIS THING BUT I AM ANYWAY, ITS OFFENDS ME! ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME!!!"
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Troof
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2012-10-05, 03:31 PM#22
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The Riddler
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I'm tall, and thin, with a bright red head but strike me once and I'm black instead...
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I can voluntarily flex my scalp, wiggle my ears, and control my blood pressure.
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2012-10-05, 04:33 PM#23
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Masterpd85
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Epic!
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'MERICA!
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Originally Posted by Irisel
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I can only assume that I can voluntarily release adrenaline. The reason being is, when I do whatever it is I do to make my pupils grow larger, it also greatly increases my heart rate momentarily. It's like two mutant powers in one.

Anyone have an idea of what the hell is happening? All I can explain it as, is that feel of your stomach falling out of your ass when you're frightened or you hear bad news. I can turn that on and off, on a whim. I don't have to tense any muscles or move whatsoever; I can be perfectly still and do this.

Anyone else have this ability?
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It's because you alter the way you think. The way you think determines the way you feel. Though, from a health perspective I would not recommend doing this as it is designed for survival only. Releasing adrenaline or noradrenaline as much as you apparently say you do will damage your heart. You're causing stress when there is no need for it and you're releasing bursts of energy when you're not using it.

That energy comes int he form of hormones and fats and guess what happens when you don't burn them up? they sit in your blood and never get used up and become hard again.

One day you'll do this "trick" and you'll either stop your heart or give yourself a heart attack.
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2012-10-05, 04:41 PM#24
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Deadvolcanoes
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Is your name by any chance Wim Hof?