Outline
Quality I see stand out is being strong; to endure a lot of life’s moment with a smile

1. To be a mother is a job in itself. A. To endure child birth B. To be a single mother when your husband is deployed C. To function on a daily basis while holding on to doubt, pain. To be strong for family.

2. Greatest or worst experience in world-military spouse a. Changing of locations, deployments, orders at the drop of a dime b. Long nights, lonely days c. Wondering what will be or happen and what if?? d. Mom and dad.

3. Army veteran A. hundred degrees at day and night, sometimes real cold at nigh B. separation from family, newborn child C. long nights, even longer days, goodbyes

My Rock, My Wife
By Robert Dukes

Robert Dukes
Ms. Cadora
English Comp 1301
January 20, 2011

Not one person in this world is the same. They may possess similar qualities but will carry themselves in their own unique manner. Defining women would be the most arduous task for anyone in this world and for men it's next to impossible. Sometimes, women themselves don't know how creative and unpredictable they can be! Their brilliance makes life easy, their smiles are a harbinger of joy and they are blessed with the power to create life! My wife Melissa has many qualities that make her who she is. She’s loving, compassionate, resilient and hardheaded. The one that stands out to me the most at any given point is the strength she possesses and how she remains strong like an oak tree in an hurricane force wind. She is a mother, a wife and a veteran of the United States Armed Forces. My wife is not a millionaire, superstar or famous celebrity, but she is an extraordinary woman who like so many others has to endure the hardships of being married to a Soldier. Melissa is a mother first and foremost. The one who gives with her whole heart; is there for you rain or shine, knows a little hug goes a long way and juggles a hundred things at once. She has endured the pain that comes with childbirth; the pain that God inflicted on women for the sins of Adam and Eve. She brought three beautiful daughters and a son into this world, thus carrying a stressful second job to an already fast paced life. Raising children comes with its own share of frustrations, from the needy new born baby that requires regular care to the sullen teenager. A mother's job is anything but easy. A famous saying states that "God could not be everywhere and so he invented mothers". In this time of war brought upon our country though; she becomes a single parent on many occasions. Multiple deployments to Afghanistan and Iraq, countless training exercises around the continental United States and long days at the office here at home to prepare for all of the above all contribute to this. She has to be the one to explain to the children where daddy went and why, while fighting her own emotions. She has to cook, clean, help with the homework and change a diaper all at the same time; all knowing it will not end till I step off that plane. She has to remain mentally strong for months and even a year at a time, while I’m in a war torn country, always wondering about the unknown. She smiles through the pain because she knows, even though she's breaking inside, the children are still watching. I experienced all these emotions for a brief stint while she was deployed to Iraq. She has experienced this for five years in a row and all I can say is it is amazing. Melissa also is a military spouse because I serve in the nations Armed Forces. Being a military spouse comes with a lot positive outcomes. You develop a sense of pride especially in this time of war. The perks of being stationed overseas and traveling Europe can also be intriguing. It takes a lot of strength and willingness to deal with the negative outcomes that come with it though. To have to up and leave a house, friends and job to follow me because I came down on orders seems unfair. She has to be the one to console the kids and explain the reasons why they have to change schools and make new friends. She has to watch as I get on an aircraft and fly into a country she sees on television every day in the news. She has to live with that feeling if that was the last time I would be seen alive. She has to have the qualities of both mother and father during deployments, be a perfect host to 4 or 40, handle emergencies without an instruction manual, cope with flu and moves all around the world. While feeling joy, sadness, pain, loneliness and pride; she has to move on with life. Many people may say well she chose this life and she just needs to deal with it, well their right. To live in her shoes though one day is not an easy task but it has to be done. To live in her shoes for a year takes a quality that many people take for granted or may not understand fully, she bears it with great strides and her head held high. My wife is also a veteran. She served in the United States Army and did one rotation to the war torn country of Iraq. A mothers bond to her children is forever. She carried them for nine months and she raised them while I was gone. My wife gave birth to our daughter Noah on July 11, 2004. She was scheduled to deploy six weeks later and she did. I have left my kids on numerous occasions but for my wife to have to leave her new born baby and miss out on her first nine months had to be an excruciating feeling. She managed to get through the teary-eyed farewell at green ramp, all the pictures she received and short phone calls on that long deployment. When she came home for rest and recuperation after spending many months alone in a faraway place, I could tell it had taken a toll on her I all ways. After her fifteen days was up, she was able to relive it all over again and go back to finish her tour. Thousands of Soldiers have deployed and at least half of them have children, so some may say it was her job and duty. It still takes a lot of heart and will and strength to actually execute this process. Deployments serve as a catalyst for health and behavior change of both mothers and their children — and the longer the deployment, the greater the effect. Just another thing my wife has to go through. The word strong can be defined in many ways. Having strength or power greater than average or expected, solid: of good quality and condition and not easily defeated; formidable to name a few. Words cannot express how lucky I am to be married to this woman. To see firsthand what she has to endure on a daily basis when I’m home is mind-boggling. To wonder what she has to endure when I’m overseas is unexplainable in my opinion. Her lifestyle is a chaotic one, especially these days. She cries herself to sleep when I leave and after a phone call when I can call. She cries when one of our kids takes a first step or laughs for the first time because I’m not around to share the joy with her. She has endured over thirty six months of pregnancy, all natural child births and 2 with no pain medication. She has sat in a foreign land while her children were growing up and making memories without her. My wife is amazing. She can put a smile on her face, act like everything is fine, when really the world is on her shoulders and her life is slipping through the cracks of her fingers. I commend her for all she is and all she has bared. She has her weaknesses and she does feel pain, but this one quality of many has driven our family since the beginning.