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Different Perspectives on War - Diary

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Submitted By mariakyvsgaard
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Different Perspectives on War - Diary
Day 1
I was deployed to Iraq two days ago. The unit arrived yesterday, and we are now all settling in. On the way, we were all talking about, how we'll be back home in no time, everyone knew right from the beginning, that the peacekeeping units couldn't keep those Iraqis in place, but now that the peacemakers have arrived this should be over in a few months.

Day 15
So, today we were patrolling among the locals, it seems like people really know, that we are the ones to decide how this is going down, the civilians look at us when we walk by in our uniforms, with guns on our backs and such. A kid pointed at the G.I. Joe in my backpack the other day, I had almost forgotten about it. Sheila gave it to me the day I left, and told me I could have it, her mother and I smiled at each other and I picked her up, and kissed her on the forehead as she said "You're my G.I. Joe, Daddy." and I decided to keep it on the outside of my backpack, so I'd always remember this.

Day 40
I'm starting to get a bit worried... Yesterday I heard that some troops in another region had been contacted by the federal government of Iraq, because of some murders of Iraqi civilians. They were told that the Iraqis suspected an American unit of being the murders of these civilians.
We were also told that the American government is trying to cover up this story.
No one knows, if it's true, no one knows if we're even supposed to know this and if we can tell anyone.
Day 65
The situation over here is getting worse. Locals have started opening fire at us, rocks are thrown at our tanks whenever we are patrolling and helicopters can't be flown in at the base, because the pilots are worried, that they're going to be shot down.
We are all trying to maintain composure, but it's quite easy to tell, that everyone is watching their back all the time. I don't really know, how much sleep any of us are getting anymore, the thought of sleeping makes my stomach drop, because being unaware of what's going on makes us all feel uncomfortable.

Day 90
This is getting harder and harder for every day, John was killed by a roadside bomb 3 days ago, he never should've gone out there in that tin can of a tank!
Everything seemed to be going just fine, he told me he was just doing a final patrol for the day, and then we were going to go grab a beer afterwards. I don't really know what to do with myself right now, no one's talking about it, it's almost like it never happened?
I don't know what is going on.

Day 120
John's death has changed everything. Everyone is really paranoid and distant, things haven't really been the same lately, no one knows how to handle this, and it doesn't seem like anyone is going to tell us how to, so instead everyone just carries on, like nothing happened, this feels horrible. I don't know if I'll be able to cope with this, for the rest of my deployment time - which might not be as short as I originally thought it'd be…
Day 140
We didn't do any patrolling today. No one really wants to go out anymore. We live off can food and crackers, because no one wants to go buy food.
Last night, was the last patrol we'll be doing for this week, it was also quite different from the other ones, as it was really quick, and no one said anything, we just drove around the streets, and no one really looked out.
When we got back home, I took off my backpack, took Sheila's G.I. Joe off the outside of my backpack, and stuffed it inside it and closed the bag.

Day 165
I'm alone at the base camp with a single bullet in my handgun.
Sheila and Molly, I love you with all my heart, but the things I've seen can never be unseen and I'll never be able to live with these things.
This war won't change anything we're killing people to show people, that killing people is wrong.
I can't save the world.
I'm no G.I. Joe.

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