DREAMS, YOUTH, PASSION Dreams, youth, and passion are three essential elements in life. Unrealized dreams are just illusions. You got to carry them out, make them come true. Two years ago, our life mentor in school asked our class, “How well do you know yourself from your interests to your capabilities and your dreams?” I was staring blankly at her. I really didn’t know what to answer. She randomly called for students to share their answers. I can’t even imagine if I was called on that day. How much do I know myself? How deep do I even know about me? Basically, I’m the youngest and the only daughter to an architect husband and an accountant wife. I have an older brother. I’m seventeen years old, a college sophomore taking up BFA Advertising Arts. Apart from these things, what else do I know? I’ve always thought that I was way too different from all the other girls of my age. I lack femininity and I don’t wear makeup and stylish clothes like them. Let’s just say that I have my own style. Beyond fashion and style, there’s something that really sets me apart from them- dependence. Most ladies are dependent on guys. They are constantly searching for gentlemen who would actually take care of them. I am way too far to being like that. Considering the fact that I grew up in an environment dominated by females, I think I’ve become more independent than the others. On the bright side, I can run errands around just like what men can do. On the other hand, I tend to scare men away. Sometimes, I think I make them feel unneeded because I don’t ask for their help. I didn’t care about these things in high school because I really had to be independent. There were no boys in school so we had no other choice but to do everything on our own. Imagine eleven years of this lifestyle. I think it’s understandable that I have developed this mentality. Aside from developing my sense of individualism, I also honed my spiritual living. Up until now, I am attending a Catholic school. Being in this kind of environment was a big help in uplifting my spiritual aspects. Ora et Labora was my motivational motto since I was young. For me, a creative balance of prayer and work is the key to absolute success. Prayer without work is nothing and at the same time, work without God is nothing. People always regarded me as a girl with such strong personality. My family once called me “brave little girl”. My friends would always run to me for comfort because they knew I could contain their emotional state. Again, the question would pop; how well do I know myself? Just like the other teenagers, I face problems. Whether it’s about family, school or relationships, I have problems, as well. I tend to get emotionally unstable, too, it’s just that, I don’t want others to see. Maybe I like to act cool and strong. When I’m hurt, I write about it. I keep a diary and usually scribble my emotions out. On extreme cases, I run to the chapel for some private and intimate time with God. I have been played by fate. I have experienced joy, happiness, excitement, euphoria. I have been hurt, taken for granted, and rejected. Just like the other girls, I tend to have mood swings. I am actually emotional and I admit that. More often than not, on random cases, I just want to break down and cry my heart out. Our life mentor would always tell me “You have the right to your own tears.” I believe that. From all the things I’ve been through, for all the smiles I smiled, all the frowns I frowned, the laughter and the tears, they all made me stronger. As the song goes, “We’re not broken, just bent.” Eventually, we’ll find a way out of the dark. As for my passions and dreams, I believe that I inherited my father’s artistic genes. I was an outcast when I was young. I was always left out in a corner with pen and paper. I was always drawing. Seeing my mom go to the office and deal with a mountain load of paperwork with lots of digits did not leave an impact to me at all but seeing my dad draw made me want to the same. As I was growing older, my teachers and classmates were starting to appreciate my writing. It was very overwhelming to hear their compliments and remarks so I decided to practice and develop my writing skills as well. Furthermore, it was in performing that I really fall deep in love with. I loved drawing, yes. I loved writing, yes. But my feeling when I was on-stage was different. It just started in 4th grade and I acted for a mini play in school. I enjoyed it and since then, I became active and volunteered myself for other roles. This continued until high school. I temporarily left the arts in senior high school to concentrate on academics and college examinations. Nevertheless, in God’s grace, I was able to pass my college entrance tests and finally got into where I am now, the University of Santo Tomas- College of Fine Arts and Design. When I was younger, I always told my mom I wanted to take up fine arts when I go to college. She always opposed my dream and it took me a decade to convince her. Like a child, we weave dreams and now that we’ve grown up, we learned to acknowledge reality. Dreams, youth and passion are indeed three essential elements in life. Youth will eventually fly away and will never come back. We can't help to accept that we are not as good as the others but it doesn't mean that we can't be better. It is natural to compare yourself to other people. It is not bad as long as you use to improve yourself, maximize your potentials, and reach your goal. I am part of the youth, the hot-blooded youth. As long as it’s here with me, I will cease the moment to live my life as young people should. Sooner or later, my youth would be gone. Before I knew it, it has already evaporated through the air. Unrealized dreams are just illusions. You got to carry them out and make them come true. At this point in time, I’m on my way to fulfilling my dreams, slowly defeating the illusion. These dreams are founded on my passion and nurtured by my youth. Soon, I’ll be turning 18. I won’t be as young anymore. Nevertheless, age is just a number. However, I have to act accordingly. This journey would be concluded from all the authentic souvenirs I will gain- the memories, lessons, end experiences. As long as I’m young, I’ll be passionate on my dreams. This, I guess, is who I really am. I am a rebel. I rebel against time and societal discriminations. I am an insurgent to the conformities of society, someone who has her own way of achieving things, and someone who takes her critics beautifully. I believe God has a reason why he made me unique, why He gave me such distinct personality, and why He gave me such a strong willpower. Who knows, maybe I can change the world, or at least change someone else’s life. The future will always be uncertain. As for my plans, I only have one- be who God wants me to be. That’s my ultimate plan.