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Greek Mythology

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Submitted By maryhojo
Words 639
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Minutes Supplement!
Math Pickup Lines!
I don’t like my current girlfriend.
Mind if I do a you-substitution?

Archimedes cried out “eureka” and ran around naked and filled with joy when he discovered that the volume of a solid can be determined by how much it displaces. Spend more time with me and you will do the same.

Here is a proof by seduction.
Being a mathematician is tough work. Is there any chance that you can provide me with an easier kind of job?

Euclid said that two parallel planes don’t touch. Let’s go back to my room and study some non-Euclidean geometry. Why don’t you be the numerator and
I be the denominator and both of us reduce to simplest form?

I don’t care what Godel’s
Incompleteness Theorem says, because I know that you complete me. There are many proofs of my theorem, but you are far and away the most elegant.

Let me show you that the function of my love for you is one to one and on to. I have a solution to Fermat’s
Theorem written on the inside of my pants. Want a hot Euler body massage?

Shall I iterate using Newton’s method to find your 0?

In game theory I study situations in which both players can win. You want to be a part of one?

You have one compact set.

You give me a positive derivative
(Also: my vector field has a positive divergence when I am around you).
Ever wonder what L’Hopital’s rule has to say about limits in the form of me over you?
If you don’t want to go all the way, you can still partially derive me.
My vector has a large magnitude, care to normalize it?
I see that you have two nice maxima, mind if I solve for the minimum?

You are one well-defined function.
I like the area bounded by your two curves. Can I plug my solution into your equation? Let my ability to perform ε-δ proofs of a limit show you that E.D. doesn’t limit my ability to perform.
Here is an elementary proof of the
First Fundamental Theorem of Love.
I know much about geometry,
I know much trigonometry,
I know much about algebra,
I know what a slide rule is for,
So I know that 1 and 1 is 2,
And if this 1 could be with you,
What a wonderful world this would be. How can I know so many hundreds of digits of pi and not the digits of your phone number?

Why can’t love be a one to one function? Then our relationship could be injective.
Why don’t we use some Fourier analysis on our relationship and reduce to a series of simple periodic functions. Now that the demonstration using
Fermat’s Little Theorem is over, here is a demonstration using my little man.
The law of contrapositives says that we should use a condom.
I would really like to bisect your angle. Are you the square root of 2?
Because I feel irrational when I am around you.
How about we turn our binary operation into a group?

Want to see if my linear solution solves for the zero of your system of equations? I can figure out the square root of any number in less than 10 seconds.
What? You don’t believe me? Well, then, let’s try it with your phone number. Are you a vector-valued function?
Because I would really like to see how much you flux when I curl you.
Mathnet had Agent Monday. Do you want to be my agent saturday night? Meeting you is like a switch to polar coordinates: complex and imaginary things are given a magnitude and a direction. Huygens’ favorite curves were cycloids, but my favorite curves are yours. Nice calculator. Wanna iterate?

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