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Indian Camp "Own" Version

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Indian Camp
Ernst Hemingway
My father pulled back the blanket from the Indian's head. His hand came away wet. I looked towards him, and saw his face expression had changed. He mounted on the edge of the lower bunk with the lamp in one hand and looked in. The Indian laid with his face towards the wall. His throat had been cut from ear to ear. The blood had flowed down into a pool where his body sagged the bunk. His head rested on his left arm. The open razor lay, edge up, in the blankets. I bent slightly forwards against the doorway of the shanty. I could see the Indians head hanging from the neck. I looked away horrified. My father looked back towards me, and maintained his eyes. His eyes asked me if I was okay, but then suddenly he said: "Take Nick out of the shanty, George” I looked at him and said that there was no need of that. I stood in the door of the kitchen, and had the whole time a good view of the upper bunk when my father, who had a lamp in one hand, tipped the Indian's head back. He looked around in the shanty, and saw the Indians faces. They were all looking at him. Their faces showed their grief for the dead Indian. The women sat beside of the dead Indian and cried, but the men stood up and showed their respect for the Indian. I looked around in the shanty and watched what was going on around me. I could feel my heart starting to beat faster. I wiped sweat away from my forehead. My eyes began to get wet, and I began to breathe faster. I tried to look over to my dad, to catch his look. He looked confused around in the shanty, but when his eyes ran over me, he caught my look. He understood the expression in my eyes. He could see I was uncomfortable. My father went over to the dead Indians wife. He laid his hand on her shoulder, and tried to comfort her, but she just sat with her baby in her arms, and cried in her lap. After he made sure that the woman was okay, he ran over to me, and hugged me tightly, and he kept holding me. It was just beginning to be daylight when my father and me walked along the logging road back towards the lake. We walked in silence for a long time before my dad got stammered out: "I'm terribly sorry I brought you along; Nickie," he said silently. All his post-operative exhilaration was gone. "It was an awful mess to put you through." I didn’t say anything. I avoided answering. I didn’t blame him for taking me with him. He did what he thought was best. He looked at me with a wondering look, that I didn’t answer his question, but I changed the topic, and asked him about the lady instead. "Do ladies always have such a hard time having babies?" "No, that was very, very exceptional." My father said "Why did he kill himself, Daddy?" "I don't know, Nick. He couldn't stand things, I guess." His head went down, and he took a deep breath, before continuing. I could feel his thoughts were some place else, after I asked. I continued asking: "Do many men kill themselves, Daddy?" "Not very many, Nick." I don’t know if he just said that to calm me down. "Do many women?" "Hardly ever." He said convincingly. "Don't they ever?" "Oh, yes. They do sometimes… But…” He didn’t finish his sentence when he saw my face. I looked terrified at him, and he looked back and said, “That was not the way mom died, son. Your mom…” And then he stopped. He turned his head away from me. I could see the tears rolling down his cheek. I really wanted to ask him more about my mom, but I could see his pain, in his face every time he tried to make a sentence to give me answers. I waited in a short time, before I got stammered "Daddy?" "Yes." He said quietly. "Where did Uncle George go?" "He'll turn up all right." But I didn’t believe that. He didn’t seemed “all right” when he walked away with the two Indians. I doubted whether I was going to see him again. He had been away for a long time, and the two Indians were not returned either. "Is dying hard, Daddy?" "No, I think it's pretty easy, Nick. It all depends." I hadn’t thought or asked about death before this day, but after he said that death was easy, I felt a peace descend upon me. A peace I had never felt before. I was suddenly not afraid to die. We were seated in the boat. I sat in the stern, and my father was rowing. The sun was coming up over the hills. I looked against the sun, and felt its warmth in my face. The warmth spread in my body. It was one of the most delighted moments. A bass jumped, making a circle in the water. I trailed my hand in the water. It felt warm in the sharp chill of the morning. I gazed over the lake. It was so peaceful. The water was completely still and clear. I looked at my father and I could see he enjoyed this silent moment as much as I did. He looked at me and smiled. I felt safe. In the early morning on the lake sitting in the stern of the boat with my father rowing; I felt quite sure that I would never die, and then my eyes closed.

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