...Hernandez 1 Clarisa Hernandez ENC1102 Professor Clark May 19, 2014 infidelity in a relationship For the most part many couples complain that the reason why their relationship came to an end was because of infidelity issues. In a society such as ours, where the divorce rate is sky high, infidelity plays a major role and of great concern to all those who are presently married, or those who are someday hoping to be. Emotional and sexual infidelity is the two most studied forms of infidelity. Infidelity is a sexual and/or emotional act engaged in by one person within a committed relationship. Reasons for me choosing this topic, was because i wanted to learn why would someone in a commited relationship who qoute on qoute "Love" their partner damage them emotionally. The thought of another person breaking up the “two halves that make a whole” is not even an issue. Think again, this world is not a great place, and often enough the most important person in ones life finds some reason to be unfaithful. Infidelity is a kind of thing that could leave a scar for all eternity. My question is "If you're so called happy" than why are you being unfaithful ?. Cheating seems like it is almost a guaranteed topic of discussion at least once a day. Whether you’re hearing a struggle of someone close to you, hearing about it on the television, or even telling your own personal experience, we hear about it way too often. As a young adult i honestly fear of adultry, i wouldnt want the man that...
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...Out of Control Infidelity. Reasons for cheating, Ways in Which People Cheat, or Is it really that out of control or just actually being discussed more? Amanda A Northrup Schiller International University Abstract Cheating seems like it is almost a guaranteed topic of discussion at least once a day. Whether you’re hearing a struggle of someone close to you, hearing about it on the television, or even telling your own personal experience, we hear about it way too often. Cheating can be done in the palm of your hand, just on your cell phone alone. We are surrounded in a social media thriving world which allows you to chat with anyone via email, games, apps, text, and even websites designed for the cheating spouse. The reasons people cheat are plentiful; anywhere from intimacy issues, to boredom. But is it really this out of control, or is it that it’s just talked about now rather than staying behind closed doors? Out of Control Infidelity. Reasons for cheating, Ways in Which People Cheat, or Is it really that out of control or just actually being discussed more? When I bought my first “smartphone” I was told to,” Be careful, that phone literally puts the world in the palm of your hands.” It is true for so many reasons and can be an amazing, helpful, piece of technology for the average person. It can also be a gateway for any person regardless of race, sex, or religion. A pathway, if you will, to begin on the road of infidelity. Cell phones don’t only call people or...
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...Infidelity and divorce Infidelity is is referenced as marital disloyalty, unfaithfulness, a breach of trust or a disloyal act and it is also called adultery. The word is as strong as the act and the feelings that come along with it. Society as a whole look down at it, but by speaking with different people on the subject I have found that the man sees this acts sometimes acceptable as long as it is being perpetrated by another man. Woman on the other had find this to be distasteful and sometimes refused to even talk about this subject especially with a man asking the questions. This practice you can see changes as the subjects get younger. While the older more established woman frown at this, the younger woman seem to not have an emotional attachment to the hate of this act. Many of these younger woman find that it is acceptable for the woman to be the infidel one and the reasoning behind that is that for many years it has been acceptable by men to see other men commit this act and they have allowed it. The sense from these young woman of equality reaches even this level. I was able to talk and interview a couple of different couples of different generations and get their perspective on infidelity and how it ruins relationships and marriages. I first decided to talk to the men and basically as why men cheat, this had many different reactions depending on the way that the man was brought up and what part of society this gentleman came from. The one area that was...
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...Reconstructing a relationship after infidelity Infidelity is certainly one of the most destructive things that can happen in a relationship and can cause severe emotional pain. It can lead to the end of a relationship quicker than most other problems. Financial problems, health issues and other disagreements can strain a marital relationship but such problems may not cause as much heartache and desolation as infidelity (Fife & Weeks, 2008). This is because unfaithfulness undermines the foundation of a relationship. Nevertheless, an affair does not necessarily have to mean the end of a relationship. Given time to heal and with a common goal to rebuild the relationship, it is possible for a couple to emerge from infidelity with a relationship that is stronger and more sincere than before. It is difficult to determine exactly how many couples have had affairs, but one study found 37% of men and 20% of women admitted to being unfaithful (Rutherford, 2008). Men tend to have affairs for sexual reasons while women stray more for emotional reasons. In other words, men may be seeking sexual gratification in an affair while women may be seeing emotional gratification of the need to feel special. Does the discovery of an affair mean the marriage is over or irreparably damaged? Not necessarily. Fifty percent of marriages stay together following the discovery of an affair. Two thirds do not divorce if the couple seeks counseling (Rutherford, 2008). Living with the after effects of...
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...How Children Are Impacted By Marital Infidelity Abstract This research will show how a parent’s infidelity can impact their children’s perspective of marriage, love and intimate relationships. The study was conducted in April 2014 and explored the impact of a parent’s infidelity on adults through a review of literature and critical analysis of the information in an ethnographic, qualitative manner. Table of Contents TITLE …………………………………………………………………..…1 ABSTRACT ……………………………………………………….….…..2 Introduction ……………………………………….………………………4 Research on infidelity …...………………………………………..……….5 Social media as a source to increase cheating………………….………….6 Adult children of parental infidelity…………………………………….....6 Results of children with cheating parents …………………………………7 Assumptions and Limitations ………………………………………….…..9 Conclusion…………………………………………………………………11 Work cited …………………………………………………………………12 Infidelity A business owner has been married to his wife for only 25 years. This couple has 3 children. The couple appears to be happily married, and they have a nice home. A late Friday night after he leaves his company he decides to go to a bar with his cousin and leaves the wife to take care of his and his cousins kids. At the bar the man and his cousin go to the bar to order a beverage. Not after ordering his drink, a woman goes up to him. She asks the men if she can join them. The three of them seem to enjoy...
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...Review of studies on infidelity Bahareh Zare1+ 1 Islamic Azad University, Marvdasht branch, marvdasht, shiraz, iran. Abstract. This paper reviews empirical studies over the past decades from all over the world in order to assess what researchers have done about infidelity issue and identify gaps in the literature where further research is needed. These studies are categorized into eight groups: 1) Different types of infidelity 2) Gender difference in infidelity 3) Education level and infidelity 4) Genetic effect on infidelity 5) Personality and infidelity 6) Reasons of infidelity 7) Consequences of infidelity 8) Infidelity and treatments. The existing body of knowledge relating to these groups of studies will be summarized in this paper. Key words: Infidelity, Personality, Gender, Education Level, Genetic Effect. 1. Introduction Nowadays, infidelity is a most important reason of divorces. Based on research reports, 90% of all divorces involve infidelity. The most consistent data on infidelity drives from the General Social Survey which sponsored by the National Science Foundation to track the opinions of Americans about social behaviors since 1972. The survey data shows that in any given year, about 10% of married couples (12% men and 7% of women) have engaged in sex outside their marriage. But detailed analysis of the data from 1991 to 2006 shows surprising shifts. University of Washington researchers have found that the rate of lifetime infidelity for men over 60 increased...
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...Adultery is an age-old social problem. History records have multiple accounts where kingdoms fell; leaders stumbled, careers ended, and children suffered as adultery was committed. Consider the issues caused by infidelity in the workplace, courts, and nation. There are different types of infidelity. The definition of adultery includes sexual infidelity intimate exchange with no romantic involvement, and sexual and romantic relationship. Adultery is a pronounced problem in today’s society. It’s spreading faster than many people could imagine and by some almost uncontrollable. OMG….I can’t wait to watch SCANDAL tonight. Sound familiar? This show has broken down barriers but also has created an interesting dialogue concerning one of the most tumultuous plots on television. The primary leads to the show, The married President of the United States and a single Washington hotshot fixer are in the erotic love affair that has millions glued every Thursday on ABC. Married!!! Affair! SUPPORTIVE AUDIENCE??? How is this possible? Yes, this is television, but “the other woman” is usually considered a home wrecker. The cheating husband is a scoundrel. Why is this the exception? There now seem to be progressions of “just how wrong is it?”? The forbidden love between Olivia and Fitz, and millions of viewers that cheer them on at the expense of the First Lady. It’s the “cheering on” that intrigues me. It has created a long-standing debate on fidelity and how we as a society have become desensitized...
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...people happy. People do not always live up to their exceptions or morals. People make mistakes some small like a white lie, but some huge like adultery. Betrayal is not always adultery. Betrayal can be abandonment or falling out of love suddenly. We should not be sorry for our feelings but for our actions caused by our feelings. If someone is losing feelings they should tell their partner as soon as possible so both people can begin to heal and there are no lies. Steinbock mentions a situation about a man whose wife was paralyzed and cannot participate in sexual activities. After years of staying faithfully by his wife’s side, the man commits adultery but continues to love his wife and stay by her side. So there can be infidelity without sex and sex without infidelity. Steinbock concludes that marriage is sacred and we should honor fidelity within our marriage if we truly love our partner. After examining Steinbock’s thoughts on trust and deception, open marriages, and fidelity as an ideal I can conclude that I have a new insight on adultery. Adultery involves deception and violating trust. Open marriages do not have deception but are not as romantic. Therefore traditional marriages should be respected and fidelity should remain pure between partners. ...
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...WHERE IS THE LOVE? LACK OF COMMUNICATION CAN LEAD TO RELATIONSHIP TRAUMA Effective communication shapes a relationship. Effective communication enables a relationship to survive and thrive. Without communication, a relationship has a very slim chance of surviving. However, communication is more than just spoken words. Effective and true communication spans far beyond the spoken words. Most relationships fail because there is a lack of effective communication. To hear and to have your voice heard without hurting one another is what effective communication should be. When communication breaks down in a relationship no one feels acknowledged. Lack of communication can quickly escalate and can lead to arguments, loneliness, inappropriate relationships, and dissolution of the relationship. I am not listening to you! Your stupid and you do not listen to me! These are some of the milder things that are said during an argument. The issue at hand could have been very easily solved if communication was involved and each person involved listened to one another rather than talking at one another. Soon the tension builds, and the debate is becoming more heated. Finally, the unsettled issues and lack of communicating leads to more tension and harsh words. During an argument, each person is yelling and blaming each other. Most times during a disagreement or argument, you say things that you will later regret. If you do not know how to communicate effectively, the arguing eventually...
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...TTW: Gender Stereotypes – Cheating Jen Garcia October 17, 2011 Human Relations In today’s society, men and women are still not viewed equally. There are still many stereotypes for men and women in the dating arena. One would think there are many stereotypes when it comes to cheating. It would be assumed that men cheat more than women. Are the stereotypes correct? Are they way off base? Let’s find out. Let’s talk about cheating. When it is said a couple is breaking up due to cheating, it is sometimes assumed the male of the relationship was the cheater. According to a stereotype, males are larger cheaters than women. (Elizabeth, 2010) The stereotype also says that women are less liking to cheat because once they are in a committed relationship, they focus on one person. However, women do cheat, just for different reasons. Men cheat because they look at it as a challenge. Women begin to cheat when they begin the need to feel more attractive. Cheating is a bad idea no matter what the reasoning. There is never a good outcome when cheating is done. Especially if the couple has children, the outcome gets very complicated. As I am doing more research online, I found some new statistics. According to a website, a recent study showed forty-five to fifty-five percent of married women engage in a relationship outside of their marriage. The study also showed that fifty to sixty percent of men engage in relationships outside of their marriage. (Alexander, 2010) This study proved...
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...Marriage and Divorce Marriage is no longer a dependable family tie. Today’s society looks at divorce lightly but there are cases where one should divorce and where one should omit divorce. Couples divorce for many reasons, some matters are solvable other are not. People now a days divorce for dissatisfaction in sexual life, lack of communication, or are having financial problems. These kinds of problems may be solved by going to a marriage council. There are much stronger reasons to why a spouse should divorce. One should divorce if there are emotional or physical abuse, marital infidelity, drug or alcohol addiction and, contradictory differences. As humans, we are not perfect. We make mistakes, and usually learn from them but there are other cases where humans cannot control their behavior. Some bad actions and behaviors are really difficult to change. It takes a lot of time, and strength to overcome. There are problems that one cannot solve. First problem that some couples face is emotional and physical abuse. Couples who are physically or emotionally abused should divorce right away. According to Cathy Meyer, a journal writer from about.com, if he or she hits, slaps, shove or punches their mate, their behavior will continue. The spouse will repeat his or her action. The person who is being abused should know that it is not their fault that no one deserves to be hit, slapped, shove, or punched no matter what the issue is. As a personal experience, I have been a victim...
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...children to be a success, is a good thing, it can become pressure to get that success at any cost. The accolade is more important than how you got there. This is also about students today being more externally motivated (degree gets you a job; a means to an end) rather than internally motivated (degree is knowledge and self-development). As with employee motivation theories, externally motivated students have little loyalty to the institution or the teachers and only surface interest in the academic knowledge itself. Normalisation of deception? Another important issue is the ‘normalising’ of cheating behaviour. Small acts of cheating are committed by our peers in every day life to get movies and music; in countless celebrity reports of infidelity and even committed by institutions and government representatives. Cheating therefore can in some contexts be justified as ‘necessary’, ‘unavoidable’ or perhaps ‘doing what it takes’. All these...
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...Society today is obsessed with celebrities. It seems like every time you turn on the television all you hear about is someone having an affair. When I hear about people like Tiger Woods, Jesse James, and John Edwards cheating on their wives, it leaves me wondering; why people would risk losing their families, their jobs, or their self-image for what seems to me as just sex. And it’s just not celebrities; it is people in all walks of life. I am going to put all judgment aside and really try to understand this behavior from a biological, psychological, and sociological aspect. Biological Aspect When we first meet someone our body undergoes many chemical changes. Our palms began to sweat, our hearts race, and an excitement fills our bodies. “Endorphins, biochemical compounds that are responsible for making us feel pleasure, are released into the body. This creates a thrilling and dizzying feeling almost like a high. As time goes by and the relationship continues, the biochemical environment in the brain slowly changes” (Cheating and Narcissism Support, 2010). Some people begin needing that high, like a drug, just to feel normal and will go to any lengths to get it, even if it cost them everything. This can create a sexual addiction. “Just like drug addiction, sex addicts have a compulsion towards fulfilling their sexual desires. Sex and the thought of sex tend to dominate the sex’s addicts thinking, making it difficult to work or engage in healthy personal relationships. Sex...
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...extremely disastrous. All of us feel the temptation to cheat at some point in life. And sometimes we even do. But then overcoming this temptation is the main idea and the lesson to learn. However, in some individuals the process seems amicable and the threshold for moral ways keeps falling down with every act of cheating. This leads to serious vicious cycle which ends nowhere. Once fell in the trap of unethical performance, individuals find it extremely hard to break the cycle. There are different levels and types of cheating. It may range from small school going children to adults in performance years of their lives. Similarly, the domains of cheating are also diverse, viz. academic cheating, cheating in sports and gambling, marital infidelity etc. Cheating can and does occur in all spheres of life. But here we would mainly consider the first option, the academic cheating. Academic cheating is adoption of immoral and unfair means to get higher marks or grades in the examinations. This sort of cheating is highly prevalent in schools and colleges. Cases of academic cheating have also been reported even in higher studies. This gives a big jolt to the principles of education. The main aim of any educational system is to develop self reliant and self dependent individuals. But cheating leaves no space for proper development of the individual and leaves a permanent scar on the personality of the individual...
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...Running Head: ADULTERY AND WHY IT MATTERS ENGL126-Sound Writing Skills Instructor: x Final Author May 09, 2011 The gimmick filled reality television and high-speed internet has spun us for a loop and left people so dizzy, they have forgotten which way is up. In an article from Time, Caitlin Flanagan explains why marriage matters and Olivia Stren from Flare discusses why women are optimistic about being given the opportunity to have an affair. As if it is now fashionable to cheat on your wife or husband, adultery has become a socially accepted “norm” as a result of changing demographics and its prevalent nature. This moral regression will leave our society scarred if left unchecked. Adultery cannot be dissected and understood without first understanding the institution of marriage and what it stands for. Let us forgo the typical, contract idea, “in sickness and in health” and the whole “love” thing and settle with the belief, for this argument, that marriages are the beginning of a new generation. Marriage is intended to raise the children, to protect, and instill in that new generation the teachings we want them to take into the future to make our world the best it can be (Flanagan, 2009). With that said, what is marriage as it stands today? If children are watching the moral fabric of society, one of the oldest traditions in the history of our people, melt away and be replaced with selfishness and depression? We are creating the ultimate “Me-Generation” who...
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