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Love, commitment and pure relationship

In 1980, Sharon Thompson conducted an investigation about the attitudes values and sexual behavior of American teenagers. She discovered major differences between the way boys and girls discussed this topic. She found that the boys were not in a position to talk much about sex. The boys only talked about sex in a briefed manner that appears it only occurs at different intervals in time. What she discovered on girls was contrary to the boys. The girls seemed to understand this topic very well that they discussed lengthy on the topic with very little contribution from the interviewer. Sharon concluded that girls are more addicted to love and romance than boys.

Thompson concluded that romance gears sexuality in a way that sexual activities are seen as a way an ultimate relationship. However, this affects mostly the girls because girls breaking their virginity is considered as a loss while boy’s first sexual experience is considered as again. Boys tend to force sexual activities while girls prefer to take it slow. Virginity in girls is seen as something given up. Thompsons concluded that sexual diversity exist along the persistence of romance thoughts although it is not easy at times. This was discovered from the lesbians interview where they found it irresistible than the heterosexuals.

Thompson discovered that girls she spoke to did not have to fight to attain sexual freedom. These freedoms exist it is upon the girl to make the right choices out of it. This rendered the girls as the main experiments in the quest for romance topic. This was a problem in the nineteenth century where girls saw sex as the only way to persuade women to stick to them. Girls are prone to fantasies of motherhood and hopes for eternal love. They find themselves breaking the taboos by following emotional energy. This cause them to have unhappy love experience affair by the end of their teen life because of disappointments. These experiences make their minds prone to many ideas as they approach their late teen life. Most of them at this age have completely lost hope with relationship and looking forward to getting a job and have an independent life.

According to Thompson, women in the older days viewed getting out of home as the appropriate time to get married. When a woman thought of leaving his parents, she was thinking of finding an attachment. Between men and women who are anticipating for future relationships, a man considers himself individually but a woman thinks of them both. In the past, all women anticipated for marriages. Even if a woman is single now, they still anticipate for marriage.

Romantic love has been mostly about women. Most men seem to be untouched but this story, but they too fall in love according to the past records. Men have too been influenced with the ideas of romantic love but in a different way from women. It has been clearly understood that women long for a perfect relationship while men mostly look from status among their friends. Material rewards and rituals of male solidarity emphasize this. (Joanna pg59)

Romantic love and confluent love takes various forms. Romantic love depends on projective identification where partners are attracted and then bound. This creates a feeling of wholeness. It is also strengthened by the difference in masculinity and femininity. Projective identification is about relationship whose continuation depends on intimacy. The other love is confluent love that is contingent love. Divorcing is on the high rise today where this is an effect of the occurrence of confluent love rather than its cause. Romantic love is mostly sexual love that involves sexual satisfaction that is a key element to whether the relationship will be sustained or dissolved. Confluent love is based on a society where everyone has a chance to have sexual accomplishment; it is presumes the disappearance of the schism among respectable women and those who lie in the traditional social life. (Deborah pg 36)

Work cited

Chambers, Deborah. A Sociology of Family Life: Change and Diversity in Intimate Relations. Cambridge: Polity Press, 2012. Print.

Reed, Joanna M. A Closer Look at Unmarried Parenthood: Relationships, Meanings, Trajectories and Gender. , 2008. Internet resource.