Essay II
In relationships people believe that arguments and misunderstandings are okay. People believe that arguments will help the relationship and later lead to eternal happiness. Sometimes we are so accustomed to someone we believe violence is okay and will soon stop. These people choose to stay in these abusive relationships because of their attachment to their significant other. In the music video, “Love the Way You Lie” by Eminem featuring Rihanna, two individuals are in dysfunctional relationship. “Love the Way You Lie” shows the hardships of abusive relationships and how difficult it is for someone to leave the relationship because of the love, forgiveness, and abuse that is caught up within that relationship.
In every relationship people tend to go through struggles, these struggles often lead to arguments and abuse. In the music video “Love the Way You Lie” the lyrics and the video make thoughts and emotions appear of what it would be like to be in the position the couple in the video is in. In the music video Rihanna sings, “Just gonna stand there and hear me cry/ But that’s alright/ I love the way you lie” (0:15). She shows forgiveness by making up excuses for the way her partner is treating her. Love has the ability to blind people and they don’t see what they are being put through. This makes it difficult for one to leave an abusive relationship because the love she feels for her significant other overpowers the pain she feels. Eminem sings, “Who’s that dude? I don’t even know his name. I laid hands on her, I’ll never stoop so low again. I guess I don’t know my own strength”(Eminem 1:04).
People are so blinded by love that they soon begin to ignore the reality. In the beginning of the video the couple is laying in bed and the woman notices that her partner has another woman’s name and phone number written on his hand. In the video, we see how she fights him because of what he came home with. She begins to argue with him and he abuses her and pushes her away, but in the end they end up back together. She is accepting the abusive relationship and it’s getting out of control. He continues the cheating and abusing because she accepts what he is doing to her. These individuals are in love and let jealousy and anger stand in the way which is affecting their relationship. Even if one is being cheated on and being abused one doesn’t care. Love takes over and makes it difficult to leave one another.
Being in an abusive relationship is difficult to escape especially when problems between the two keep reoccurring and never have an ending. In the music video Eminem sings “Yesterday is over, it’s a different day/ Sound like a broken record playing over”(2:13). In their relationship they are constantly arguing and hitting each other. He tries to believe that today is a new day and that things will go differently. However, it’s a never-ending cycle in the relationship that repeats like a broken record. It is because of the love that they have for each other that this repeats. Eminem also sings, “Now I know we said things, did things that we didn’t mean. And we fall back into the same patterns, same routines”(Eminem 3:02). These “patterns” and “routines” make it difficult for this couple to leave each other because of the continuous cycle that occurs within an abusive relationship.
Rihanna sings, “Just gonna stand there and watch me burn well that’s alright because I love the way it hurts” (0:01). Being in the position she is in Rihanna is well aware of everything she is being put through. It is difficult for her to escape this relationship because of her unconditional love for him. People believe things will settle back into place and refuse to escape from the misery we are being put through. The chorus describes the love and hate relationship of the two and no matter what they are going through they will always come back to one another other. Rihanna portrays that she is okay with the physical and emotional pain only because of her loving and caring emotions she has for him. The dark atmosphere played in the video symbolizes the depression and abuse the actor is going through, it allows us to position ourselves in her shoes and give off a feel of sympathy towards the situation
It’s hard to describe what one is going through. No one really knows what it’s like to feel the pain someone else is feeling. Even if talking about feelings it’s still difficult to feel what they are feeling. Eminem sings, “I can’t tell you what it really is, I can only tell you what it feels like” (0:26). He actually means what he is saying and feeling. This causes the listener to feel more strongly towards the point he is making. You can’t really explain what one is going through without being in the situation yourself. However, you can explain the feelings and how bad the pain is. Eminem gets his point across when he says, “You don’t get another chance, life is no Nintendo game” (2:20). He tries to prove that these things in life are nothing to play with. People don’t get second chances at life as they would in a video game; life is not a game and you cannot just simply restart it whenever you’d like. In real life you don’t have do overs and extra lives. When coming across hardships in a relationship, one always tries their best to make up for whatever went wrong. Although, after trying so much there is a time when one grows sick and tired of this cycle and begin to give up.
In every relationship things always seem so perfect, you’d never imagine things to go down fall. “Got that warm fuzzy feeling/Yeah, them chills, used to get 'em/ Now you're getting fucking sick of looking at 'em”(1:50). In this quote we can see the beginning of an unhealthy relationship. In the beginning of a relationship, you are at a honey moon stage were everything seems to be perfect and the couple is madly in love, but with time people begin to grow tired of each other. In this specific situation, the protagonist rages and states the beginning of an abusive relationship. Eminem states, “You swore you never hit em…Now you’re in each other’s face spewing venom in your words when you spit’em”(1:55). He uses metaphors to show how words can be hurtful almost as if they are weapons. These words sting almost as if they are venom.
No matter how difficult things may get, one can never picture themselves without their significant other. Throughout the music video we see how the woman constantly plays with fire initiating the violent relationship the couple is going through. The woman playing with fire may represent that she is taking part in something dangerous that may have a negative outcome. Eminem sings, "If she ever tries to f@#$% leave again I'mma tie her to the bed and set the house on fire."(3:43). He wants her all to himself and refuses to let her leave him. He is jealous and afraid to ever see or picture his woman with anyone else. Although he is cheating his feelings for his woman still remain and won’t allow her to leave. He fears that she will probably go out and do the same. At the end of the video we see both Rihanna and Eminem standing in front of the burning house, which indicates the destruction of an abusive relationship and how harmful and unhealthy it can be. The fire seen throughout the music video can be a metaphor for the struggles and abuse of a domestic relationship. They are both crazy for one another and refuse to be leave each other.
In the music video, “I Love the Way You Lie” by Eminem featuring Rihanna we see the concept of violence and love advocated throughout the video. The story of a couple and how they come across hardships and how it’s not easy to overcome them. The powerful use of pathos, logos, and ethos help us receive a better understanding of Eminem’s and Rihanna’s lyrics in the song. It isn’t easy for a woman to just let go when they have been so attached to their partner. They rather cope with the physical and emotional pain than to leave the one they love. There relationship becomes abusive and tormenting to one another.