Free Essay

Mr Laptop

In:

Submitted By iqmax
Words 381
Pages 2
It all started when our cliche, protagonistic figure, Bill Brasky, woke up in a haunted thicket. It was the second time it had happened. Feeling exceedingly exasperated, Bill Brasky poked a potato, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). A few unfulfilled decades later, he realized that his beloved iPad was missing! Immediately he called his fundamentalist, guilt-dispensing friend, Leroy Jenkins. Bill Brasky had known Leroy Jenkins for (plus or minus) half a million years, the majority of which were flamboyant ones. Leroy Jenkins was unique. She was plucky though sometimes a little... oafish. Bill Brasky called her anyway, for the situation was urgent.

Leroy Jenkins picked up to a very ecstatic Bill Brasky. Leroy Jenkins calmly assured him that most spotted wolf hamsters yawn before mating, yet man-eating capybaras usually charismatically belch *after* mating. She had no idea what that meant; she was only concerned with distracting Bill Brasky. Why was Leroy Jenkins trying to distract Bill Brasky? Because she had snuck out from Bill Brasky's with the iPad only two days prior. It was a enchanting little iPad... how could she resist?

It didn't take long before Bill Brasky got back to the subject at hand: his iPad. Leroy Jenkins sneezed. Relunctantly, Leroy Jenkins invited him over, assuring him they'd find the iPad. Bill Brasky grabbed his hippopotamus and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Leroy Jenkins realized that she was in trouble. She had to find a place to hide the iPad and she had to do it fearlessly. She figured that if Bill Brasky took the nappy, busted-out hatchback, she had take at least eight minutes before Bill Brasky would get there. But if he took the Segway? Then Leroy Jenkins would be exceedingly screwed.

Before she could come up with any reasonable ideas, Leroy Jenkins was interrupted by two stupid marmots that were lured by her iPad. Leroy Jenkins cringed; 'Not again', she thought. Feeling frustrated, she aptly reached for her potato and aggressively groped every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent--the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the swamp, squealing with discontent. She exhaled with relief. That's when she heard the Segway rolling up. It was Bill Brasky.

Similar Documents

Premium Essay

Computers

...Computers in Our World Our world is constantly evolving. The only thing in life that is constant is change, and Computers are no different. Even though computers have only existed in the last seventy years, many believe computers have changed the world more than any other technological advance. Over the past seventy years, computers have made a quick evolution into our world with several major advancements. Just as with all things, however, there was a beginning to the computer generation. Computers were invented to solve “complex mathematical problems using calculators within a computer(De la Bedoyere,1). Computers now can do anything within a large box. A desktop computer has many external parts joined together. A computer consist of a mother board,the motherboard controls and processes what is typed and clicked and programs running. The middle of the motherboard consist of all the work being processed. Including work and data which is sent through the motherboard to the Central Processor unit (CPU). The computer has to hold memory also to save things within computers. The Ram is a major component in saving information but only works when the computer, is running. The reason a Ram is used is to save and store information,so that when it is being worked on it wont be erased. A Computer also has external and internal drives that can read information. When the computer came out for personal use, it made it better for communication possibilities(ceruzzi,6,7) 1939 was an imperative...

Words: 1404 - Pages: 6

Premium Essay

Paradigm Shift

...Edgar Garcia Mr. Shah December 19, 2014 Research Paper 1: Paradigm Shift One of the many useful technological advances is the use of everyday computers, where it is by notebook, laptop, desktop, etc. The technology in computers upgrades in recent years have been remarkable because now some can detach from the keyboard and only be a touch-screen tablet, others can use multiple applications at once, and for the most part they can all be easily accessible to most. In ITT, there is use of computers all day every day in the classrooms, mega labs, student lounge, and even by the faculty and students when they go home to finish up assignments or grade papers. In twenty years from now all technology will advance exponentially, but one of the most important being the computer because almost everybody that have access to it use it on a daily basis. The computer would see many upgrades that will impact us such as voice commands like the ones used in smart phones, but more advanced and in more languages and able to identify any person through there accent and determine what language he or she is speaking. The computer can be hooked up to all appliances in ones house, so they can say a command out loud and the computer AI will assist in the command given to it. This can be useful for many such as the elderly, if they have an accident in their house they can use the AI to call for assistance. If a break in occurred the AI can immediately contact the authorities to assist the victims...

Words: 369 - Pages: 2

Premium Essay

Proposal Paper

... To: Mr. Evel Bigglesworth, CFO, Virtucon Investments 200 Main St, Houston, TX 77002 From: Lead IT Systems Operations Analyst, Virtucon Investments Subject: Progress Report for Virtucon Investments, Sales Department Laptop computer upgrade Purpose This is a progress report for the for the proposed laptop upgrade with the purchase of fifty laptop computers. This is due to the fact of Virtucon Investments restructuring its Sales Departments information technology needs. To date, my team has compiled a list of laptop models that best suit our company; and from those, one will be selected which we recommend for purchase. Summary On November 2nd, 2015 Mr. Bigglesworth CFO of Virtucon Investments, notified my IT department within Virtucon that he was exploring the possibility of restructuring its Sales Departments information technology with the purchase of fifty laptop computers. We came to the conclusion; because of the aging technology, and its effect on our clientele, it is important our Sales Department immediately have their computer workstations upgraded. As of November 23rd, 2015 we were slightly behind schedule due to certain laptop models not being in stock for proper testing. This will not hinder my department to provide a final analysis report to Mr. Bigglesworth on or before December 3, 2015. We have continued to work diligently to obtain all the proper laptop data in order to come to a final laptop computer...

Words: 1056 - Pages: 5

Premium Essay

Ndas

...(Q1) NDAS starts their long journey since 1985. Currently state of NDA office automation, system integration and networking differs from one department to another while some departments work manually. The payroll department currently carries out its own data processing using a mini computer. Due to expansion of the business and complexity of the billing process these processes are automated throughout Florida offices. The marketing and sales department which is headed by Bob Jones runs as a Local Area Network limited the sales and marketing division itself. This connects every personal computer of each account representative. When we come to Accounts receivable division which is headed by Jane Van Dyke, a powerful microcomputer server provides database for both customer billing and bad debts. The accounts payable division that is led by john Lawson functions with its own vender data base stored on an old minicomputer server. This data base holds billing details such as billings of ODI to NDAS and also this division is responsible for the payroll process. A LAN can be established as well since employees here also got PC’s on their desk similar to accounts receivable division. Peter Browne, the maintenance supervisor of the fleet maintenance division refuses to automate his division’s record keeping processes and satisfied with the usual way. Therefore this division has no computer capability. Fleet maintenance division has another part which is ‘Dispatch’. This section...

Words: 2218 - Pages: 9

Premium Essay

Change Management Steps

...cultural differences. BenQ and the motives for the acquisition BenQ was established in 2001 as Acer’s separate brand armed to operate in the electronics industry. Later in 2006, Acer disposed its remaining BenQ shares. Before the acquisition, BenQ had few trials in the mobile phone product markets, however, its cash cows in wider the electronic markets were desktop computers, laptop computers, monitors and LCD projectors. As a Taiwanese manufacturer operating in a low cost labor market, BenQ was also known as a contract manufacturer for major phone OEMs such as Nokia and Motorola. Being a contract manufacturer, BenQ was facing the low profit margins characterizing such stage in the mobile phones value chain. Furthermore, if BenQ was to grow on its own as mobile phone brand, it had to achieve considerable scale in the R&D and the sales channels, a survival characteristic in such industry dominated by few. With the successful example of Lenovo acquiring IBM hardware unit and the aspiration of diversifying forwardly and becoming a global brand, BenQ acquired Siemens mobile unit in Oct 2005. BenQ chairman Mr. Lee expressed how this deal fits BenQ aspirations...

Words: 709 - Pages: 3

Premium Essay

Cis 106 Assignment 2

...All-In-One PC # 1 Media IP: 192.168.1.79 Lenovo All-In-One PC # 1 Media IP: 192.168.1.79 Laptop #1 Lenovo G50 Notebook IP: 192.168.1.73 Laptop #1 Lenovo G50 Notebook IP: 192.168.1.73 Laptop # 2 Lenovo G50 Notebook IP: 192.168.1.75 Laptop # 2 Lenovo G50 Notebook IP: 192.168.1.75 Samsung Blue-Ray Player Samsung Blue-Ray Player Ethernet Switch Ethernet Switch Wireless Broadband Router Wireless Broadband Router AT&T Home Internet AT&T Home Internet Laptop # 1 Laptop # 2 Acct # 1 Mr. Battle Acct # 1 Joshua Admin Rights, Admin Rights Acct# 2 Ms. Battle Acct # 4 Jaylen Basic User Rights Basic User Rights My Home Network My home network consists of the basic 4 computers and network devices that are need to create a small home network. The hardware that I purchase all came for the same vendor. I have purchased many computer devices from Tiger Direct Store and have always been very pleased with the quality. Below summarizes the hardware that I purchased to setup my home network. 1. Laptop: I chose to purchase the 2 Lenovo G50 Notebook. This laptop is ideal for use at home. G50 Notebook has a 15’’ display with Intel HD Graphics controller. It comes with 4GB of DDR3L 1600 PC3-12800 memory and i7 2GHz Dual Core Intel processor with Windows 7 Home O.S. I can use this laptop as anywhere and anyplace in my home and will always be attached to the network as long...

Words: 1186 - Pages: 5

Free Essay

Nt1310 Physical Networking

...NT1310, Physical Networking Activity 1 – Data on Fixed Line vs. Cellular Device Nick Conforti Mr. Hafet 09/15/2014 There are two main types of broadband connection, a fixed line or its mobile alternative. Both have their strengths and potential weaknesses so you need to consider what suits your needs before you sign up on a lengthy contract. Fixed line broadband is what most people have at home. It's a fast internet connection delivered by telephone wire (ADSL) or fiber optic cable. As the latter is now capable of speeds in excess of 100Mb, an increasing number of British homes have "superfast". Mobile broadband uses the same technology as mobile phones to give you internet access wherever you go with your laptop, netbook, tablet or iPad. It's slower and usually comes with a relatively low download limit, but allows you greater flexibility away from home. The Pros of having a mobile broadband is that you can take your broadband wherever you go - A mobile broadband connection is exactly that, which means that you can access your emails, check the sports results or watch YouTube videos no matter where you are, provided you have 3G receptions. Stop paying for line rental - Millions of people continue to pay for line rental on a home phone landline that they rarely use, just so that they can get broadband at home, with mobile broadband, there's no need to pay line rental - potentially saving you over $100 a year. The Cons of have a mobile broadband is Low download...

Words: 592 - Pages: 3

Premium Essay

Search for Miss Ssg (Script)

...members and the spirited PTA Officers. J & M: ladies and gentlemen, good evening! Welcome to the search for MISS SSG 2011-2012 and the induction ceremony of Tugdan National High School. M: as we commence this momentous event, may I request everybody to rise for a soul warming doxology to be lead by selected students. J: please remain standing for the Philippine National Anthem to be conducted by Mrs. Rachel Fesalbon. M: the world is proud of having its great leaders. From ancient times up to present, good leaders foster the rest of the world to stand firm, to dream big and to take the highest flight man could ever take.. good leaders prepare people to survive the realities of life !ladies and gentlemen, let us hear from our loving Madam Melicia Galicia for her opening remarks. : and at this moment, may I call on Mr. Christian Solidum to introduce the board of judges for tonight’s affair. J: thank you sir! And now let us all welcome our candidates in their production number. J: now, we have the induction ceremony of the newly elected SSG Officers who will be presented by Mr. Randy A. Musa, SSG Adviser and to be inducted by Hon. Herman Galicia, ABC President.. may I request all the officers to come on stage. M: folks, let us be entertained as the selected students set on stage in their modern dance presentation. : thank you guys!! J: ladies and gentlemen, a big round of applause to the candidates in their fashionista...

Words: 790 - Pages: 4

Free Essay

Turn of the Screw

...home after the previous governess died. Douglas begins to read from the written record, and the story shifts to the governess’s point of view as she narrates her strange experience. The governess begins her story with her first day at Bly, the country home, where she meets Flora and a maid named Mrs. Grose. The governess is nervous but feels relieved by Flora’s beauty and charm. The next day she receives a letter from her employer, which contains a letter from Miles’s headmaster saying that Miles cannot return to school. The letter does not specify what Miles has done to deserve expulsion, and, alarmed, the governess questions Mrs. Grose about it. Mrs. Grose admits that Miles has on occasion been bad, but only in the ways boys ought to be. The governess is reassured as she drives to meet Miles. One evening, as the governess strolls around the grounds, she sees a strange man in a tower of the house and exchanges an intense stare with him. She says nothing to Mrs. Grose. Later, she catches the same man glaring into the dining-room window, and she rushes outside to investigate. The man is gone, and the governess looks into the window from outside. Her image in the window frightens Mrs. Grose, who has just walked into the room....

Words: 1066 - Pages: 5

Free Essay

The Star

...character? To what extent is her final protest justified? How do the other characters portray themselves by their attitudes toward the ritual? Mrs. Tess Hutchinson stands out right from the start: she arrives at the lottery late. She explains to Mr. Summers that she was doing her dishes and forgot what day it was. The town treats her lateness lightly, but several people comment on it, “in voices just loud enough to be heard across the crowd, ‘Here comes your Missus, Hutchinson,’ and ‘ Bill, she made it after all.’” (Jackson 501). It is ironic that she is the one who wins the lottery, and is fated to be stoned. So Tess Hutchinson has already been noticed by people as one who is not entirely part of the group. Before the drawing she is friendly with the other women, pretending to be pleased to be present. The very moment that she sees is her family that draws the black dot, though, her egotism is evident. “You didn’t give him time enough to take any paper he wanted. I saw you. It wasn’t fair!” (Jackson 504). She continues to scream about the unfairness of the ritual up until her stoning. Mrs. Hutchinson knew the lottery was wrong, but she never did anything about it. She pretends as much as she could to enjoy it, when she truly hated it all along. Maybe Jackson is suggesting that the more hypocritical one is, the more of a target they are. Mrs. Hutchinson was clearly the target of her fears. I think sometimes we have no problem remarking on people’s adultery until it is ourselves that...

Words: 548 - Pages: 3

Free Essay

Mr Ahmed

...May I beg that you will write at once to the mother of this unfortunate woman--to Mrs. Catherick--to ask for her testimony in support of the explanation which I have just offered to you?" I saw Miss Halcombe change colour, and look a little uneasy. Sir Percival's suggestion, politely as it was expressed, appeared to her, as it appeared to me, to point very delicately at the hesitation which her manner had betrayed a moment or two since. I hope, Sir Percival, you don't do me the injustice to suppose that I distrust you," she said quickly. "Certainly not, Miss Halcombe. I make my proposal purely as an act of attention to YOU. Will you excuse my obstinacy if I still venture to press it?" He walked to the writing-table as he spoke, drew a chair to it, and opened the paper case. "Let me beg you to write the note," he said, "as a favour to ME. It need not occupy you more than a few minutes. You have only to ask Mrs. Catherick two questions. First, if her daughter was placed in the Asylum with her knowledge and approval. Secondly, if the share I took in the matter was such as to merit the expression of her gratitude towards myself? Mr. Gilmore's mind is at ease on this unpleasant subject, and your mind is at ease—pray set my mind at ease also by writing the note." "You oblige me to grant your request, Sir Percival, when I would much rather refuse it." With those words Miss Halcombe rose from her place and went to the writing-table. Sir Percival thanked her, handed her a...

Words: 572 - Pages: 3

Premium Essay

The Virgin

...He went to where Miss Mijares sat, a tall, big man, walking with an economy of movement, graceful and light, a man who knew his body and used it well. He sat in the low chair worn decrepit by countless other interviewers and laid all ten fingerprints carefully on the edge of her desk. She pushed a sheet towards him, rolling a pencil along with it. While he read the question and wrote down his answers, she glanced at her watch and saw that it was ten. "I shall be coming back quickly," she said, speaking distinctly in the dialect (you were never sure about these people on their first visit, if they could speak English, or even write at all, the poor were always proud and to use the dialect with them was an act of charity), "you will wait for me." As she walked to the cafeteria, Miss Mijares thought how she could easily have said, Please wait for me, or will you wait for me? But years of working for the placement section had dulled the edges of her instinct for courtesy. She spoke now peremtorily, with an abruptness she knew annoyed the people about her. When she talked with the jobless across her desk, asking them the damning questions that completed their humiliation, watching pale tongues run over dry lips, dirt crusted handkerchiefs flutter in trembling hands, she was filled with an impatience she could not understand. Sign here, she had said thousands of times, pushing the familiar form across, her finger held to a line, feeling the impatience grow at sight of the man...

Words: 2581 - Pages: 11

Free Essay

Ssadas

...Contact Information for Teaching Staff at Thomas Knyvett College If you email a member of staff please allow 48 hours for a response. If it is an urgent matter please contact a member of the SLT or your son/daughter’s House Leader. Senior Leadership Team Mrs Miss Mr Mr Mr Miss Mrs Mrs Mrs Miss Miss Mr Mrs Mrs Ms Mr Mrs Mrs Mrs Miss Miss Miss Miss Mrs Mr Miss Mrs Miss Miss Mr Ms Ms Mrs Mrs Miss Mrs Mrs Miss Mr Mrs Mr Mrs Mrs Miss Miss Miss Ms Miss Miss Miss Mrs Janise Farrah Andrew Sheldon Chris Freya Claire Valerie Inma Seema Allison Adam Sian Kapila Theresa David Aimi Correen Jackie Emma Tanya Joann Alison Rachel Nick Abigail Wendy Lauren Isobel Andy Megan Mazie Carolyn Priscilla Preetpal Gurinder Sian Emily Steven Christine David Susan Vanessa Hayley Jean Azmari Linda Laura Nicole Hayley Tanya Marillat Thantrey Ward Snashall Bellamy Oliver Parsons O’Keeffe Alvarez Balrai Bates Belbin Bolsh Chalisgaonkar Chambers Chapman Curtis Danks Dillaway Edge Ellis Epps Fairclough Foley Fowler Frith Grantham Jankowski John Knott Lister Lloyd-Smith Manwaring Naicker Nashad Oberai Reeve Razzell Ratsakatika Reilly Retsinas Rowntree Russell Sculpher Semadeni Shikder Strachan Thomas Vernon Warren Zaheer JMa FTh AWa SSn CBe FOL CPa VOk IAL SBa ABa ABe SBo KCh TCh DCh ACs CDa JDi EEd TEl JEp AFa RFo NFo AFr WGr LJa IJo AKn MLi MSm CMa PNa PNd GOi SRv ERa DRa CRe SRe SRe VRu HSc JSe ASh LSt LTh NVe HWa TZa Head of School Deputy Head Assistant Head Assistant Head Cross Phase Assistant Head Partnership...

Words: 591 - Pages: 3

Premium Essay

Missed Appt

...Article 86 of the Uniform Code Of Military Justice. This Article covers Point and Place of Duty. That means from PT formation to COB that is where you will be. What a lot of Soldiers do not understand that includes appointments made by them or someone else. We have appointment times, SP times, formation times and many other start times that dictate we will be there. If a Convoy has an SP time of fifteen hundred hours and the Soldiers decide to show up late because they did not feel like getting ready on time people could die. If they rolled out on time, they may have avoided the ambush or avoided the Vbid that hit them in the bottleneck. It sounds extreme but time management plays a critical role in the Army. When you make an appointment that spot has been reserved for you. That means if you have been given the last slot someone else is going to have to wait for another one to open up. This could be one day or one month. And because you missed it someone else is still going to have to wait when they could have had that spot and been there. If you are going to miss the appointment or cannot make it due to mission they do allow us to cancel the appointment with in twenty four hours. The Army allows us to make appointments for whatever we need. Be it for a medical appointment, house goods, CIF, Smoking Sensation or whatever we need these recourses are available to us. But when Soldiers start missing appointments theses systems start to become inefficient. What a lot of Soldiers do...

Words: 354 - Pages: 2

Free Essay

The Virgin

...THE VIRGIN by Kerima Polotan Tuvera 1) He went to where Miss Mijares sat, a tall, big man, walking with an economy of movement, graceful and light, a man who knew his body and used it well. He sat in the low chair worn decrepit by countless other interviewers and laid all ten fingerprints carefully on the edge of her desk. She pushed a sheet towards him, rolling a pencil along with it. While he read the question and wrote down his answers, she glanced at her watch and saw that it was ten. "I shall be coming back quickly," she said, speaking distinctly in the dialect (you were never sure about these people on their first visit, if they could speak English, or even write at all, the poor were always proud and to use the dialect with them was an act of charity), "you will wait for me." As she walked to the cafeteria, Miss Mijares thought how she could easily have said, Please wait for me, or will you wait for me? But years of working for the placement section had dulled the edges of her instinct for courtesy. She spoke now peremtorily, with an abruptness she knew annoyed the people about her. When she talked with the jobless across her desk, asking them the damning questions that completed their humiliation, watching pale tongues run over dry lips, dirt crusted handkerchiefs flutter in trembling hands, she was filled with an impatience she could not understand. Sign here, she had said thousands of times, pushing the familiar form across, her finger held to a line, feeling...

Words: 2588 - Pages: 11