Jennifer Flake
Mrs. Kathy Marks
English 10
9 February 2010
Narrow is the Gate “If I could only make it through middle school…” I thought to myself as I tossed my book bag onto the couch. The overload of school, boys, and drama made me wonder how I made it from day to day. My sixth grade year had been a catastrophe so far. At lease once a day, I thought about where my parents were. My grandmother showed love for me in place of them. Although there were many people in my life who loved me, the thought of my parents still nagged at the back of my mind. “What could I have done wrong to be left by the people who brought me into this world? Was it my looks or my personality?” These thoughts were always sitting in the back of my conscience. Sometimes, I would lie in bed at night, unable to sleep, and I would feel this overwhelming sense of rejection. On most days, I felt as if the gates of my life were closing rapidly in my face. Growing up, my grandmother was always my role model, but I never imagined I would be living with her. My parents decided to live in sin rather than work towards the gates of Heaven. They were driven by rebellion and deceit every day, and the responsibility of taking care of their only child just wasn’t a priority to either one of them. As I tossed and turned in bed, I wondered what the talk of the lunch table would be the next day. I always seemed to be the center of attention in a negative way. I was often referred to as the “new girl” or the “loner with the blonde hair.” Being the new girl was something I often pondered anxiously when I lived in Texas. The workload at my new school was so much more than I had anticipated. In addition, jealousy was an issue I fought every day. Most of the girls at school were the stereotypical cheerleaders who vainly applied mascara while walking down the hallways. As I slowly slipped into unconsciousness, I uttered to myself, “A pessimistic personality is not going to take me anywhere.” Many things changed between my sixth grade year and my senior year. My grades kept improving and I overcame the intimidation of the snobs that fluttered around the school. Every day seemed to pass by more rapidly with the idea of graduation. High school was a time of my life that I did not want to leave. I soon realized I only had a few months left to enjoy the friends I had finally made. I always wondered who would take care of my grandmother when I went away to college. College was a time to teach you responsibility into the real world. I felt as if I had always lived inside a bubble with my grandmother. I was not sure how I would take moving on to the new chapter of my life. The white envelope was sealed tight when Principal Mrs. Johnson handed it to me. The note described the plan in which graduation would run. The valedictorian would speak first and following would be the presentation of the diplomas. In a matter of months, I would not be returning to the institution of preppy, sports loving people. A new gate of my life would soon be unlocked. Graduation day was a day filled with smiles, tears, and an overabundance of hugs. Parents and grandparents filled the auditorium to every inch and corner of the building. Many emotions were floating through the air that day. Graduation day was an exciting point in one’s life to congratulate all one had accomplished. One of my favorite songs played while the entire senior class walked in a single file line out of the auditorium. Me and my grandmother stood outside and watched a student embrace her mom and dad for a few minutes. “If only my parents could have come to see me graduate…” I thought to myself. Deep down inside I knew they thought about me as much as I thought about them. I took one last look at the school as we gradually pulled away. “Now, I have learned that opening your gates could lead to better opportunities.” I mentioned to my grandmother as she grinned at me. A gate is sometimes used to describe a passageway in a fence or something that opens and closes. My gate was used as symbolism for opportunities in life. Whether it is negative or positive, the gate of your life has to be opened and closed. If you are too focused on your gate closing, you may miss the opportunities life would bring you when it was open.