Empathy Exercise

Gina Krazer

PSY/220

December 13, 2011

Mary Jeanell Buck

Snap judgments have a negative effect of hindering one’s ability to foster empathy. Often, such judgments can prove to be incorrect about a person, if the time is taken out to get to know him/her. According to Bolt (2004, p. 51), “People are not always what they seem at first glance. This is not to say that negative judgments are always erroneous or that people never contribute to their own failure, merely that life situations are unique and shape people’s actions more than we know.” Almost every individual is guilty of making these snap judgments, including myself. However, I can only think of one person that I presently have negative feelings toward. I am not in the position to say that I know this person well either. She is a coworker of mine and one certain situation influenced my judgments about her. If I found that I was wrong, I would change my opinion and work to change the basic relationship that she and I hold.

The circumstances that created this snap judgment occurred during the time I was training her to be a server. On the second day of her training, I had about three tables in a row not leave any tips. Since this does not normally happen, I had suspected that she may have taken the tips, because she was cleaning all of my tables. I had my general manager check the cameras and, as I suspected, she had taken the tips. I confronted her about it and she immediately apologized and said she stuck them in her pocket and forgot to give them to me. I have a hard time believing she was telling the truth because I never forget to give a coworker their money from a table, and I often clean tables that are not mine. My general manager obviously believed she was telling the truth but I and other coworkers had strong doubts. If I were to find that I was wrong, I would first apologize to her. Then, I would think back on that day and try to put myself in her shoes. Using empathy would improve my opinion about her and that day. I do recall her being quite nervous about the new position.

I would attempt to improve this basic relationship because I prefer to get along with everyone. After apologizing to her and considering the situation, I would forgive her and try to see similarities between us to build a better relationship. Getting to know her through conversation and her life situations could help me understand how she could be so forgetful. Additionally, finding traits that are common between us would help me foster a connection. In turn, this would provide a more comfortable working environment and maybe even begin a friendship. Making snap judgments does not influence positive character; rather, being critical, compassionate, and empathetic fosters clarity and positive attributes in life.

Reference Page

Bolt, M. (2004). Pursuing human strengths: A positive psychology guide. New York, NY:

Worth Publishers.