Application of Psychology to Modern Life
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Application of Psychology to Modern Life
Self-reflection entails evaluating oneself to analyze the past experiences in their lifetime that might have either a negative or positive influence. Self-reflection helps to come up with techniques of coping with similar situations later in life. Self-reflection also involves picking a personal experience, and evaluating the challenges as per the situation and naming ways in which one was able to overcome the challenges or perhaps failed to address them. This essay involves a self-reflection in one of my most stressful lifetime situation and how I managed to cope up with it.
The Stressful Situation Back in high school, my dream was to excel academically so that I could pursue a Business Management degree by getting a scholarship to study at Oxford University. Bearing that in mind, I had to work hard to attain a grade that will enable me to get the scholarship. The reason as to why I always wanted to get the sponsorship is because I was pretty sure that my parents would not afford to pay school fees in any university. I worked extremely hard in my studies, spending sleepless nights, forming discussion groups and sacrificing my social life so that I could have more time to concentrate on my studies. After leaving high school, I was pretty sure that I had done my best to achieve the grade that I always wanted. After the results had been released, I was so shocked to see that I had not attained a grade that would allow me to get the scholarship. It suddenly dawned on me that my life had come to a stop and that my dreams were shattered. I knew that my parents would not afford college school fees due to their low income and the dependence of many family members for basic needs and education. I had dreams of starting my company, live in the best city, a luxurious house and car as well as marry a beautiful woman. I knew that all that could not be achieved without education. I started imagining myself doing casual jobs such as working as a message or a waiter. I did not believe it because I had done the best I could to achieve a good grade. I kept asking God why it all happened to me bearing in mind that I was prayerful. All my close friends had performed well. I was ashamed to face my parents because I had assured them that I was going to excel academically. Everyone in my neighborhood knew that I was a bright student and that I would do well in my studies. There is no way I could convince them that I had failed. I spent sleepless nights trying to think about what I could do to reverse the situation or make my life better. First, I did the best I could to avoid my friends, relatives, and neighbors due to the embarrassment that I had. By doing so, I spent a lot of time in solitude trying to think about my life. The only person I felt confident speaking to was my mother. I explained my situation to her and told her about my dream. She was so understanding and supportive. I made a decision to go back to school and resit for my high school final exams. She agreed to obtain a loan and pay for my school fees. I was so exhilarated by the move, and my stress was finally over because I got another chance to prove myself and achieve my goals. Different strategies can be used to contain the stress and obtain a solution. The problem-focused strategy involves the use of active ways to directly face the situation that caused the stress (Park, 2010). Concentrating on the problem is the main idea of this strategy. Examples of ways of confronted with a stressful situation are analyzing the entire incidence, working harder, applying what was already learnt in life or talking to a person who has an impact on the situation. The emotionally focused strategy involves handling feelings of stress rather than tackling the problem. Focusing on emotions requires magic thinking, brooding, denying, blaming, or seeking social support (Weiten et al., 2012). Not all strategies are effective at solving problems are helping avoid or release stress. There are a couple of efficient strategies that can be used to handle stress. Behavioral, modifications include meditation, not giving attention to the stressor, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, punishment, positive and negative reinforcement and Emotional Freedom Technique. Important decision-making skills that can be applied during stress include determining the best alternative, putting the decision into action, gathering information, evaluating choices and their consequences, and identifying the purposes for decisions made (Baron and Brown, 2012). Barriers to problem solving include inexperience, being negative, feeling inadequate, low self-confidence and lack of persistence (T.J & Nezu, 2010).
Coping strategies
The following are coping strategies that can help handle stressing situations: being positive, making the decision not to overreact to the stressors but deal with them, and taking an objective view of the stressor (Weiten et al., 2012). Others include communicating with people, accepting the situation, obtaining social support, dealing effectively with mistakes, developing control and discipline, and practicing for a long life of resilience.
Being positive is one strategy that can be used to cope up with stress. People should take every obstacle that they encounter as a learning experience. Being optimistic enables a person to become motivated to continue working hard (Weiten et al., 2012). Being positive may be achieved by using appropriate language, focusing on the present, accepting things when they are not right, accepting that nobody is perfect, interacting with positive people, keep learning, contributing to different activities and being grateful for things that are done by other people. Obtaining social support is one way of remaining positive during stressful situations. Friends and relatives can give informational support, tangible support, emotional support, and companionship support. Emotional support involves showing love and trust, the offering of empathy, affection, encouragement and intimacy. Tangible support involves providing financial support, services or material goods (Weiten et al., 2012). Informational support involves providing guidance, advice, and suggestions. Companionship support gives people a sense of social belonging. Koslowsky, et al. (2013) asserts that communicating with people enables individuals to understand themselves and learn about the existing opportunities in their surrounding. Some of the ways of communicating effectively include creating the right environment, speaking at the right time, facilitating an open conversation, removing distractions, organizing and clarifying ideas, staying on topic and being clear. Other ways include thanking the listeners, setting the listener at ease, being articulate, and being attentive to others.
Strategies Applied
Some of the strategies I used to handle the stress include problem-focused strategies. I first started by analyzing the situation to understand what could be done differently to achieve different results. I also resolved to go back to school to put more effort into my studies. Talking to my mother helped me feel confident about my abilities. There are also a couple of emotion-focused strategies that I used. I first started by accepting my situation, imagining about my dream and my life as a student for the final time and seeking social support from parents and teachers. Being positive helped me have the confidence to go back to school. Taking an objective view of why I failed in my exams also helped me understand what I could do to improve myself. Developing self-discipline and taking control of my actions and emotions also helped me make sound decisions. Some of the behavioral modifications I used include positive reinforcement. I started thinking of ways that I could use to get myself out of the situation. One of the ways that I punished myself for failing was by avoiding watching movies, playing football and spending time with my friends. My social life became terrible due to the amount of time I spent concentrating on books. I also meditated a lot to form strategies that I could use to improve my grades. I also underwent Cognitive Behavioral therapy to ensure that I made sound decisions. I also decided not to give attention to people who had not supported my decision to go back to school. Spending time with positive friends enabled me to tap the best from them. I was able to learn their effective study methods and forming discussion groups. Learning communication skills helped me understand how to express myself to other people. It also helped me learn how to answer questions.
References
Baron, J., & Brown, R. V. (Eds.). (2012). Teaching decision making to adolescents. Routledge. D’Zurilla, T.
J., &Nezu, A. M. (2010). Problem-solving therapy. Handbook of cognitive-behavioral therapies, 3, 199-225.
Koslowsky, M., Kluger, A. N., & Reich, M. (2013). Commuting stress: Causes, effects, and methods of coping. Springer Science & Business Media.
Park, C. L. (2010). Making sense of the meaning literature: an integrative review of meaning making, its effects on adjustment to stressful life events. Psychological Bulletin, 136(2), 257.
Weiten, W., Dunn, D., & Hammer, E. (2012). Psychology applied to modern life. Belmont, CA: Wadsworth/Cengage Learning.