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The Ability to Understand and Use Non Verbal Communication

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“The Ability to understand and use non-verbal communication is a powerful tool that will help you in your personal and professional life.”

The importance of non-verbal communication cannot be underestimated. It is thought that up to 93% of communication is non-verbal with only 7% being verbal. Body language is thought to make up 55% of non-verbal communication and the tone of voice makes up 38% of non-verbal communication according to the book “Silent Messages” (Mehrabian, 1971), although not everyone agrees with this. According to Phillip Yaffe, author of “The 7% Rule: Fact, Fiction or Misunderstanding”, body language and tone of voice are “ancillary activities” that convey only emphasis or emotion. In his paper Mr. Yaffe makes the argument that the content of the speech is most important and that tone and gestures are “auxiliary, not primary”. For the purpose of this essay though we are going to examine non-verbal communication and how we are perceived by these actions.
Let us first look at Kinesics which is the study of body movements and gestures. In the course of a conversation with an individual if that person is making eye contact with us and is smiling how do we feel? For me, I feel that the person is attentive and engaged in what I have to say. They are listening. Where as if that person is looking around and has a scowl on their face my feelings are that they are not listening to me and would frankly rather be somewhere else. If the person is in front of me and standing sideways I can’t help but feel they are just waiting to walk away. A lot of movement may convey nervousness or anxiety i.e. fidgeting with something in your hands or pulling at your hair. If a person slouches when they stand or sit what message does that give? To me it looks like defeat or disinterest.
Our emotions can be expressed by non-verbal communication, take for

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