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Wanting

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Submitted By SerJ4375
Words 412
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Have you ever found something you desperately wanted? You were tired of just looking at it, you wanted to have it. You thought it was the most amazing thing you found & you know you would never find something like it ever again. You kept thinking you would get it someday; was within reach. You kept dreaming of it; thought it would help you if you got it. You dreamed of taking it with you to places. It would make you forget about your problems & your worst days. All of a sudden, it's gone... Because of YOU. You made it disappear because of what you did, say, or both. You got too close to it. You kept denying that you wanted it, but hoped that you would get it. You were too scared to try & get it because you didn't want to face the cold truth of you not getting it. You were scared to ask for it. You avoided telling the truth when it was about to be gone. You thought your problems & emotions would break it, & so it did. You just rambled about other stuff to pass by the real answer. You can't find any kind of replacement to fill that void you always wake up to. Replace this "it" with someone you admire the most; that "special someone." Every day, you hope it will come back, but you die little by little each day. If it ever come back, you hope to start talking. One day, I hope you & I can talk again. One day, I hope we can hang out. One day... just one day, I hope to talk to you. However, asking for one day is asking a lot. I just hope God will hold on to you for me until we can talk. I hope you take care of yourself. I hope you are well. I hope... Will I ever get you back or should I just walk, lower my head, & give up? But, what happens if I see you around? It will break my broken heart more. I'll still feel terrible to speak to you; too much emotion. I still like you very much. I wouldn't know what to do. I'm just walking in circles right now; kind of lost. I wish you would be able to understand this. For now, it's whatever... Only time will tell. I guess I need to come to grips of the real life & try to understand all of this.

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