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Broken Smile

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Submitted By arshz24
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BROKEN SMILE

As I walk into the coffee shop’s doorway
Just like I would’ve done any other day
You looked up and looked away
And to cover my pain, I smiles and it hurt

I stared at the girl beside you
I thought to myself “Wasn’t I good enough”
My inner conscience said “He doesn’t want you”
I ignored it and when I smiled, it hurt

I went to him and asked “why did you leave me?”
He snickered and said “You are worth nothing; not even a little penny”
I tried to reply back but I failed
So once again I smiled and it hurt a lot

I woke up and felt darkness, not brightness
Put a fake smile on my face
And for the millionth time I smiled and it hurt
I cried when I remember you say “your smile makes my day”

It really pained me when you said “You are worth nothing”
Now your words are like knives in my back
Slowly becoming deeper and deeper
Hurting me more every time you spoke

A weight is falling down on me
Not letting me, not letting me think
I can’t stop trembling and shaking
Now I am sure I am breaking

Depression is here but this is the last time
I try to smile but it hurts
So I am done fighting this battle
The whole reason of being on this earth is to die

My reason for breathing is gone
I feel weak, so weak
I can’t smile, I can’t cry
Now I think “Am I really that worthless”

I am afraid to be alone
Because I know it will happen
I want one thing before
But I can’t have that thing, I can’t have him

I will never have him
So I shut everyone out
No one will be let in again
Never again

I hate you like I hate my life
Is what I think as tears pour
But love is what cuts like a knife
Love is death and death is you

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