| Changing Our Lives Essay | By: Jorell Austin | |
Dr. Kristina Nelson
English 090 - Writing Fundamentals
March 18, 2013

Dr. Kristina Nelson
English 090 Writing Fundamentals
January 13, 2013

Dr. Kristina Nelson
English 090 Writing Fundamentals
January 13, 2013

Changing Our Lives Essay

In 2012 I made an important decision. I decided to go back to school to earn my degree. For the first time (in a long time) I decided to put myself first and to care for myself the way I have cared for so many other people over the years. My quest to earn a degree actually started long before 2013. Like most people I grew up in a traditional middle class family with two hard working and wonderful parents. My parents (like most parents) wanted me to do better and accomplish more than they did. Both of my parents came from blue collar working households without much money and no formal education. My father joined the Navy at 15 in an effort to escape racism and inequality in Natchez, MS. He never completed high school, but he was street savvy beyond his years.

My mother was the daughter of a maid and a ship laborer. In 1966, she completed high school and enrolled at the local junior college. She completed her junior year of college but was forced to drop out when my grandmother suffered a stroke that left her paralyzed and unable to work. Although my mother never complained, she never seemed to get over the disappointment of not earning her college degree. Despite the hurdles of life my mother found a way to move forward and continue on after my grandmother’s illness. In 1975 she met and married my dad and had two wonderful daughters. She and my dad both secured great jobs (she was a supervisor at the one of the city hall offices and my dad worked for a local distribution company after retiring from the Navy). Even as life moved forward my mother never lost her love of education and learning. She made sure my sister and I were enrolled in private school so that we could receive the best education possible. She also discussed and proof read every assignment….at times I felt I had two teachers, one at school and one at home. To her credit, her emphasis on education paid off. I graduated in the top 10% of my class and was accepted to one the best colleges in the state of Texas. My sister didn’t do too badly either. She was named on the list of “Who’s Who of High School Students” in 2000 and was accepted to prestigious college out of state.

In 1993 I enrolled and attended college in Texas and never looked back until the spring of 1994. I had just come home for spring break (as many college kids do) and my mother complained of a knot on the inside of armpit. Living in Texas it gets rather hot and you tend to sweat quite a bit. To help with the perspiration people tend to apply an excessive amount of underarm deodorant. When this happens it causes a slight irritation in the underarm area which can lead to redness, swelling, and bumps. My mother initially thought she was suffering from this affliction. Days passed and the knot did not go away. I was preparing to head back to school the following week and my mother decided to make an appointment with her doctor to see if she could get some medical treatment for the knot under her arm.

I packed my bags, said my goodbyes, and headed back to school and my mother headed to her appointment. Three days later I would get the phone call that would change my life forever. My mother called me to notify me that she had been diagnosed with Stage-III Carcinoma of the breast (i.e. breast cancer). My mother said what every sick person tells someone when they don’t want you to worry “I’ll be fine.” The truth of matter was she wasn’t fine she was very sick. We talked some more on the phone she told me she was planning to seek treatment and there was no need for me to come home after all my father was there with her and they would manage. With a heavy heart I honored my mother’s request and stayed in school for the remainder of the Spring semester. When the semester was over I came home ready to help and ready to do whatever I needed to do for my mother. When I arrived home my mother was beginning her third month of treatment. I walked through the door in an instant the woman I knew was no longer there. I knew when I saw her I would not be going back to school in the fall.

My mother was sick and she needed me and I needed to be there for her the way she had been there for me all of my life. It’s funny how life repeats itself, I was same age she was all those years ago when she decided to quit college to take care of her mother. Despite her illness, 1994 actually turned out to be a great year. We celebrated all of our family birthdays and holidays one last time with my mother. She passed away on February 27, 1995. Once she passed away life as I knew it would change forever. After her death, I suddenly inherited a 10 year-old sister, a father who was grief stricken and lost, and all of the things my mother did and was. Needless to say college was no longer in my immediate future.

So after 18 years of raising a sister, helping and taking care of a father (who would be also diagnosed with cancer), and working my way to the top (without a college degree) here I am. For some of my classmates the decision to go back to school may have been an enormous decision. For me it was just my way of moving forward despite the hurdles of life and finally finishing what I started.