...In Raymond Carver’s “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” there was one theme that was consistent throughout the whole story. It is that not one of the four characters of the story could explain what love is. Each character in the story each had their own ideas to what they wanted love to be but not what it actually was. Whether it was suicidal love, abusive love, or just physical love, each person in the story held fast to what they believed love to be, even if they could not explain why. One of the main characters, Mel, attempts time and again to identify the meaning of love, but he never forms any clear conclusion. Each time he is about to say something important he gets sidetrack or forgets for a little while what he was about to say. For example, he tells a story about an old couple who almost die in a car crash, but half way through he gets distracted. When he finally gets to the conclusion of the story—the old man miserable because he could not see his wife—confuses the others. When he tells everyone that he will explain what exactly love is, he instead strays into a jumbled reflection about how it is bizarre that he and the others have been in love repeatedly. His efforts to illuminate the nature of love tapers off into a bitter lecture against his ex-wife. He spends a lot of his time saying what love is not and not saying what it actual is.In the story Mel says “There was a time when I thought I loved my first wife more than life itself. But now I hate her guts...
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...The word “father” appears commonly on first-grade spelling quizzes due to its simplicity of spelling; however, it holds startlingly many different meanings under its simple spelling. Most young-aged daughters characterize a father as the protector of their family who they can always rely on, a role model whom she gets inspiration from, and a counselor who provides wise guidance for her life. The Bible commands fathers to “Train up a child in the way he should go” and to “bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” Also, a British Poet George Herbert once said, “One father is more than a hundred schoolmasters.” Absence of father, in other words, means insufficient guidance, security, and love in a young child’s life. Grievously, 36.7% of children around the world are fatherless children. Factors like divorce, disease, accident, and work act as causes of absence of a father, which affects children in areas of self-esteem, relationship, education, and crime. One of the best-known causes for absence of a father is divorce. The divorce rate of societies these days is drastically increasing and is reaching a height that was never reached before. The three countries with the top divorce rate are Belarus, United States, and Sweden; and they record divorce rates of 52.9%, 54.8%, and 54.9% respectively. There are multifarious reasons why a couple decides on a divorce. The most significant cause of the divorce is lack of communication between spouses. Failure to communicate...
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...I walk a fine line (while composing this imperfect declaration of love) between a fruitless attempt at expressing my boundless gratitude and deep affection, while also maintaining the image of that delightfully eloquent man with whom you have come to expect nothing but literary flawlessness. While cynical the beginning of this letter may be, I remain resolute in producing a masterpiece of expression to all but the author's eyes. Furthermore I shall attempt to continually outdo myself by consequently showing you that these pages of insufficient ramblings are not the climax of my proclamations of love to you; but another step and attempt at expressing my true feelings. I certainly hope that you do not take my tone of difficulty in writing this...
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...Social Psychology Tutorial – Practice MCQs LECTURE 1-Me, Myself, and I 1) When we compare ourselves to others who are more capable, we are engaged in a(n) _______. A) Downward social comparison B) Lateral social attribution C) Downward attribution D) Upward social comparison E) Upward attribution 2) Henry feels helpless at his job, feels that he cannot control his workday, and feels that he is useless, worthless and inept. These characteristics would probably mean that Henry has _______. A) Low self-esteem B) High locus of control C) High self-insight D) Low locus of control E) Negative possible selves 3) When we think of ourselves as members of specific social groups, we are thinking of our ________. A) sexual self-schema B) social-personal self C) personal self D) cultural self identity E) social identity 4) In meeting a new roommate, David stresses his studious qualities, an aspect of himself he wishes others to agree with, while being willing to underplay other potentially important aspects of himself. David is practicing a ________ approach in presenting himself to others. A) self-verification B) ingratiation C) self-enhancement D) self-denial E) neurotic LECTURE 2-Everyone is a Psychologist 1) Imagine that you see a friend arguing with a sales clerk in a store. You have never seen your friend argue with anyone in public before. Therefore, you think that the clerk did something to cause the argument. The theory that most directly explains...
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...views and attitudes toward a subject of the story. By sharing these views, it helps someone distinguish or open up to new ways of thinking and feeling. To demonstrate, the theme in Raymond Carver's short story "What We Talk When We Talk About Love" portrays multiple themes, which are love, language and communication, marriage, drugs and alcohol, and violence. Although themes are not directly presented, you can derive an idea or the evidence of what the theme may be from the characters, actions, and settings that formulate the story. For example, based on the what the characters of What We Talk About When We Talk About Love are trying to define as love, you can formulate that one of the themes are the elusive nature of love. For instance, Mel says, " I was going to tell you something. I mean, I was going to prove a point. You see, this happened a few months ago, but it's still going on right now, and it ought to make us feel ashamed when we talk about love like we know what we're talking about when we talk about love" (p. 729). He is saying that even though they speak on the meaning of love like they really know what it is, he is pretty sure none of the couples actually know what they are trying to say. He tries to precisely define love by telling a story about an elderly couple that almost died in a car accident. The ending result of his story ended up being that the old man was depressed because he was wrapped in...
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...of those things and some hunky men too. That’s fantasy though. My ideal life would contain things I think most people would say are reasonable. I’d like for the people I love to be healthy and happy, myself included. I want those same people to have what they need, be it support, food or medical care. I want them to get the same treatment if their name is Smith or Bush. I want a job that won’t send me into a nervous break down and the chance to follow my interests. I don’t think that is too much to ask. I’ve managed to find my partner in life. He’s not perfect, but I believe he is perfect for me. We fight, as couples do. We love and we laugh. When things get hard, we hold on to each other for dear life. We have had some struggles that could prove to be catastrophic to a marriage. Problems, that you can easily see, how they would tear you apart. I am so blessed, that instead of ending our lives together, we grew closer. It’s a miracle. Of that, I have no doubt. We stood together when we spent day after day in doctor’s offices, failure after failure. We held hands while medications took me on emotional roller coaster rides. He stood and took my craziness when I couldn’t control it. He loved me while I was falling apart physically and emotionally. Who does that? Someone who loves you, that’s who. It’s not only been he and I who have suffered lately. We’ve had deaths that I hate to say, I believe, could have been prevented with proper medical care. ...
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...whether or not they can be happy. Society dictated that the Bennet's marriage was contractually imperative for both of them. Mrs. Bennet wanted to be secure and accepted a proposal that she thought would be acceptable. Mr. Bennet wanted a wife to take care of his needs and give him children, preferably a son. Both were tolerable to the other in the beginning and entered into the marriage with freewill. Early in the novel we learn the Bennet's marriage is portrayed as ill-fitted. They appear to be two opposites in humor, character, tact and priorities. In Chapter 1 we read: Mr. Bennet was so odd a mixture of quick parts, sarcastic humour, reserve, and caprice, that the experience of three-and-twenty years had been insufficient to make his wife understand his character. Her mind was less difficult to develop. She was a woman of mean understanding, little information, and uncertain temper. When she was discontented, she fancied herself nervous. The business of her life was to get her daughters married; its solace was visiting and news. (7) Through this passage, we learn that even after twenty-three years of marriage, the Mrs. Bennet does not understand her husband,...
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...A flock of sheep wanders as the all-seeing shepherd meanders nearby. He watches them closely as they consume their daily vittles provided by nature, making sure not even one sheep goes astray, or that any predator comes to disrupt the supposed bliss. The shepherd's love for his flock is that of presumed perfection. He maintains the assumption that as long as he guards the flock and provides ample grazing land, the flock will provide him with copious amounts of wool: that their relationship will be all right. Unfortunately, this simply may not be true; his flock can produce the wool or it may suffer from an unexpected disease or any other ailment and their presumed relationship will fail. As Christopher Marlowe so elegantly presented in “The...
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...Romance and continued intimacy is not about the quality or frequency of sex. It is purely keeping the mystery, fun, closeness and emotional connection. When the romance fades so does the closeness, laughter and togetherness. When I refer to romance I am speaking only about the creative ways each of you bring excitement, surprise, uniqueness and adventure and yes - love into the relationship. Two - There is no effective conflict resolution process. Disagreement and conflict are a normal part of every relationship no matter how close, strong or long lasting. Conflict when not dealt with in a respectful and understanding way will lead to withdrawal, editing of communication and generally failing to maintain openness and a safe emotional environment. Three - There is a lack of acceptance for their partner. From the human perspective no one is perfect. We all have flaws, opinions, prejudices, beliefs and values that are unique. When two people come together in a relationship it is normal that from time to time your partner will do or say things that drive you nuts. The inability to unconditionally accept your...
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...members, for their selfless support，thoughtfulness and encouragement． Abstract Jane Austen was one of the distinguished realistic novelists in the nineteenth- century-English literature．Pride and Prejudice is a world wide popular novel published in 1813．Austen set the story in the first decade of the nineteenth century．At that time，marriage was the only way for women to gain social status and recognition. The author of the present thesis will analyze the five marriage patterns from the perspective of sociohistorical literary criticism to explore the important role that money and love plays in marriage. It can be seen clearly that Austen fully expresses her original views on marriage：property, social status and love are three indispensable elements in a marriage．It is wrong to marry for money，but it is unwise to marry without money. Austen’s views on marriage emphasize love and economic...
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...discuss Giovanni's incestuous love for his sister, Annabella. * ------------------------------------------------- The friar, formerly Giovanni's teacher when he studied at the university of Bologna, warns him of the seriousness of his sin, but Giovanni claims his passion remains beyond his control. * ------------------------------------------------- The Friar believes that Giovanni, a good student of logic, uses logic to prove something sinful to be virtuous. * ------------------------------------------------- The friar warns him that others who used logic ‘‘to prove / There was no God ... / Discover'd ... the nearest way to hell.’’ * ------------------------------------------------- When Giovanni begs for his advice, the Friar urges him to fast and pray, which Giovanni agrees to try, though it fails to rid him of his incestuous love. * ------------------------------------------------- He believes himself fated to love his sister and to pursue her love. ------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------------------------- Commentary: * ------------------------------------------------- Attempting to justify incest theoretically. * ------------------------------------------------- Incest is seen as an expression of Giovanni’s intellectual pride. * ------------------------------------------------- Giovanni is guilty of idolatry by placing his love for Annabella above his love for God. * ------------------------------------------------- ...
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...Marriage As Sacrament In a sacramental marriage, God's love becomes present to the spouses in their total union. When the Catholic Church teaches that marriage between two baptized persons is a sacrament, it is saying that the couple’s relationship expresses in a unique way the unbreakable bond of love between Christ and his people. Like the other six sacraments of the Church, marriage is a sign or symbol which reveals the Lord Jesus and through which his divine life and love are communicated. All seven sacraments were instituted by Christ and were entrusted to the Church to be celebrated in faith within and for the community of believers. The rituals and prayers by which a sacrament is celebrated serve to express visibly what God is doing invisibly. In a sacramental marriage, God’s love becomes present to the spouses in their total union and also flows through them to their family and community. By their permanent, faithful and exclusive giving to each other, symbolized in sexual intercourse, the couple reveals something of God’s unconditional love. The sacrament of Christian marriage involves their entire life as they journey together through the ups and downs of marriage and become more able to give to and receive from each other. Their life becomes sacramental to the extent that the couple cooperates with God’s action in their life and sees themselves as living “in Christ” and Christ living and acting in their relationship, attitudes and actions. Catholic teaching holds...
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...英文荟萃网 http://www.ywhc.net 友情提供 The Lily of the Valley by Honore de Balzac Translated by Katharine Prescott Wormeley DEDICATION To Monsieur J. B. Nacquart, Member of the Royal Academy of Medicine. Dear Doctor--Here is one of the most carefully hewn stones in the second course of the foundation of a literary edifice which I have slowly and laboriously constructed. I wish to inscribe your name upon it, as much to thank the man whose science once saved me as to honor the friend of my daily life. De Balzac. THE LILY OF THE VALLEY ENVOI Felix de Vandenesse to Madame la Comtesse Natalie de Manerville: whom we ignore their I yield to your wishes. It is the privilege of the women love more than they love us to make the men who love them the ordinary rules of common-sense. To smooth the frown upon brow, to soften the pout upon their lips, what obstacles we miraculously overcome! We shed our blood, we risk our future! exact the history of my past life; here it is. But remember in obeying you I crush under foot a reluctance Why are you jealous of the sudden reveries midst of our happiness? Why show the when silence grasps me? Could you of my character without inquiring You this, Natalie; hitherto unconquerable. which overtake me in the pretty anger of a petted woman not play upon the contradictions into the causes of them? Are there secrets in your heart which seek absolution through a knowledge of mine? Ah! Natalie,...
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... 3 3 0 1 0 2 0 0 0 0 2 2 2 x 2 3 3 x 0 x G D Em C As the winter winds litter London with lonely hearts G D Em C Oh the warmth in your eyes swept me into your arms G D Em C Was it love or fear of the cold that led us through the night? G D Em C For every kiss your beauty trumped my doubt C G And my head told my heart C G D "Let love grow" C G But my heart told my head C G D "This time no this time no" G D Em C We'll be washed and buried one day my girl G D Em C And the time we were given will be left for the world...
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...maintain a healthy relationship for many years. By taking an Interpersonal Relationship course, it has given me the necessary tools to become more aware of relationships and communication with others. Throughout this letter there will be several topics that will prove vital to the success of your future marriage. The principles of Interpersonal communication will help develop strategies for your life, improve empathetic listening, and the importance of managing interpersonal conflicts will serve as a guide to a long and healthy marriage. As a couple, you have made the choice to settle down with the man/woman of your dreams. You have decided that you are going to be married and by seeking advice, you are making the first step to maintaining the love and respect you are so passionate about in your relationship. The first step is: To know the principles and misconceptions in Interpersonal Communications “Interpersonal communication is a social process, and we usually engage in interpersonal communication for one of three purposes: to meet personal needs; to learn about ourselves, other people, and the world; and to build and maintain relationships” (Sole, 2011). There are five essential aspects of Interpersonal communication that will prepare you for a...
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