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Teenage Gossip

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Posted on: Jul 9, 2009 [pic]
The Effects of Gossip on Teenage Girls

Teenage girls carry certain social labels including the image of the circle of girls sharing small scandals of each others lives.

Gossip may seem an innocent form of normal teenage life, from the outside the topics may seem inane or superficial. However, to the group participants, the conversations often center on areas of life in which the girls are heavily invested. Laurence Owen writes in “The Effects of Indirect Aggression on Teenage Girls” [School Psychology International, 2003] that activities such as group exclusion, derailing other girls and other forms of indirect bullying have consequences ranging from anxiety to deep spells of depression.

The Source of Gossip

In the course of developing friendships, many adolescent girls will belong to a number of social groups or cliques as they move through school. Transitioning from group to group may carry problems including other group members' envy or jealousy. This can result in an amazing amount of gossiping and other forms of indirect bullying.
Another source of gossiping can come in breaking the implied rules of the clique. Whether it be failing to attend a planned social function or failing to fall in line with the latest fashion, breaking the implied agreements of the friendship group can quickly place the offender in the unenviable position of being the target of false rumors.
Of course, some gossiping simply happens out of the interworking of group dynamics. Since there is an inherent drive in social groups to establish a hierarchy, some group members find themselves being attacked or excluded in attempts by other members to assert dominion over them and to bolster the bully in the eyes of the group.

Preventing the Damage of Gossip

The number one way of defending a teenage girl against the effects of gossiping is to bolster her self-esteem and self-confidence. Essential achievement of basic self-esteem enhancing skills is important in an adolescent girl's life. The stronger a girl's self-esteem, the less likely she is to stumble in the face of potential rumor making. Building self-esteem comes from a number of sources. These may include a stronger ability to problem solve, ability to receive and process compliments and an ability to handle social situations.
Parents can help girls face of gossip in a number of ways. • Identify the gossip and help the target of the rumor understand the falsehoods contained in it.

• Help the girl confront those spreading the rumors with the idea of resolving the behavior immediately.

• Encourage girls to have a wide range of interest and a wide range of friends.

• Spend time learning to understand the teenager's world and what meanings are attached to what actions.

• Help teenagers identify personal strengths and reinforce those strengths.

In the face of gossip, girls may need to learn to apply social skills which help resolve the underlying conflict or issue. If the issue is unrealistic or imagined, girls need to learn to say as much to those applying the bullying behavior. When possible, conflict resolution can be assisted by parents of both girls in a casual gathering to address the issue.
Gossiping can be devastating to teenagers. Gossiping, like most indirect forms of bullying, can result in anxiety and depression as well as lowering self-esteem and self-confidence. Parents can help by teaching girls problem resolving skills and by helping them find their strengths.
Cause and Effect of Teen Gossip
CAUSE- The cause of teen gossip could be many different things. Some reasons why people gossip are because, "putting others down makes us feel up, we feel popular when we're in on the office buzz, and it's accepted. Everybody does it." (Kee 5). In a majority of articles that is pretty much what all of them said. The major reason people do gossip is to make them feel good about themselves. "Still, gossip is our guilty pleasure." (Kee 4).
EFFECT- The result of teen gossip can result in many things. Studies were shown that talking kindly of others could raise your positive emotions by 3% and decrease negative emotions by 6%. It can also raise your self-esteem by 5% (Paul 1). Unfortunately, not all teen gossip is good gossip. Bad teen gossip could result in many ways.
Some of the possible out comes could be...
-loss of friendship
-bad reputation
-depression
-hurt feelings
-suicide
-and many other things.
How Bad Rumors Can Start
"Did you hear about Mallori?"
"No, what happened?"
"Well, I'm not suppose to tell anyone, but if you promise not to say anything, I'll tell you."
"Okay, I promise." I would say thats how about 90% of bad gossip starts. Accoring to dictionary.com, the definition of gossip is "idle talk or rumor, especially about the personal or private affairs to others." Teen gossiping is an emotional problem for many teens because it can lead to many other problems. "Not everyone does it. But almost everybody does it" (Kee 1). That quote is saying, the rumor that is being spread may not have actually happened, but everyone keeps gossiping about it. As rumors go from one person to the next, they seem to get more extreme and dramatic by the second.
How to Stop Bad Rumors
"Speak no evil. Make only positive statements. Hear no evil. Refuse to listen to gossip. Beware of repeating information. Learn to say "I'm sorry" if you speak badly of someone. Forgive those who spread gossip. Let it go" (Kee 5). All you have to do is walk away. You may be dyeing to be in the "loop", but this is someone elses business that may, or may not even be true. Some things that you hear might sound interesting and crazy, but do they really sound that realistic half of the time? Just remember to put yourself in their shoes, and see what if would be like to have everyone going around talking about you.

Teen advice: The harmful effects of gossip...gossip involving a teenager can destroy a teens self-esteem, self-confidence, give them a complex, turn them away from their once friends, ruin their reputation, etc., etc. I've seen teenagers totally destroyed in high school because of vicious gossip about them to other students. Most of the gossip is untrue and brought on by jealously of another friend or peer. Many young teenage girls are gossiped about because they think a young man another girl likes is cute. Answer this question? Is this cause to start a vicious rumor about someone who is your friend? All because they thought another friends infatuation is handsome?

This is a horrible reaction and a means of cruelty to another human being! A lot of teenagers use gossip to control their friends and by doing this if they want a friend omitted from their gang, they'll start some awful gossip about the teen to turn others against the person. This is utterly ridiculous and it is felt this person should be reprimanded or dismissed from school for a couple of days.

I've known cases where teenagers have actually committed suicide because of vicious, untrue, gossip being passed around throughout the school about them. I've also seen teenagers actually skip school and do anything to keep from going to school because of gossip going through the school about them. This affects all aspects of their ability to function properly in class and the teen falls into a shell afraid to be active in any of their school activities. Teenagers have a rough enough time adjusting to becoming an adult without having another friend turning their lives into sheer misery.

Wake up teenagers, other teens do not like the punishment gossip brings to their daily school days. It causes the teenager to not only hate their days at school but their lonely evenings alone at night. How would you like for the shoe to be on the other foot? Gossip can ruin a youngsters life and destroy their final high school years. Would you like to have a death on your hand because of the gossip you started about another teenager who was once your closest friend? Believe me, this is a terrible situation to put any teenager through and it is believed a person doing this should be punished to the hilt.

I've also seen teenagers drop out of school because they couldn't face another day at school because of the bulling from once friends. Teenagers this is totally unfair and to brand a person with vicious gossip that wasn't true in the first place is cruel. Do you know you have branded a vicious lie on someone for the rest of their life and they have "no" way of truly defending themselves? How would you like this type situation to face your life?

Many teenagers who gossip have low self-esteem and have nothing better to do.

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