My grandfather (father’s father) has been married twice. His first wife divorced him 6 months after he got married to her because he was very poor and could not fulfill all of her wishes. They have a daughter from first marriage. He married my grandmother in the same year he got divorced from his first wife in the year 1953. His financial conditions improved after he got a divorce from his first wife. His behavior was very different towards his second wife. He was very controlling of my grandmother. He often used cuss words to address her. This was from the beginning of the marriage. There could be a possibility that he might have developed some kind of hatred towards women because of his first wife leaving him and he took out that hatred on my grandmother. She was however, a very subdued kind of person. She never retaliated to it. I wasn’t there to witness their entire relationship, but from what I have heard, his behavior towards my grandmother did not improve during their entire marriage. My grandmother used to complaint to my grandfather that their daughter in laws misbehaved with her and did not give her the respect that she deserved. However, my aunts deny doing that. The only reason that I can think of her behaving this way is because she wanted to gain sympathy from my grandfather. She wanted his attention and love, which she never received. He died because of Liver cancer. He was firstly diagnosed with jaw cancer and later on with liver cancer. He was an alcoholic and used to chew tobacco.
My grandfather (mother’s father) got married in the year 1955. He used to be on tours most of the time. He used to travel to different parts of India without informing my grandmother or anyone else about his whereabouts. They had a very cut off relationship. My mom, aunt and uncle shared a distant relationship with him for the reason that he was never around. My