Dysfunctional Family
A dysfunctional family is a group of people usually related by some means, not always necessarily by blood, in which conflict, misbehavior, maltreatment and neglecting create a hostile life for its members. To explain this idea better we will see the definition of family, the differences between a healthy and a dysfunctional family; their characteristics and behavioral patterns. Some examples will help us examine this issue better, taking us to discuss the different factors that contribute to the formation of such families, along with its consequences in today’s society.
According to the Dictionary of Contemporary English, a family is a group of people affiliated by consanguinity, formed by a father, a mother and children (1). On the other hand, its etymology recognizes the Roman Empire to be the first one to define a Family. Ironically, the Romans defined it as a group of people linked, not necessarily by blood or affection (2). Instead the main link that united the ancient Roman families was labor. According to E. J. Graff in her context “What makes a Family?” She describes that the ancient families in Europe were primarily created at will, with the only purpose to improve work productivity and patriarchs would adopt grown ups into their families for a better investment. “Choice not Biology made a Family”(3) These families would consist of legitimate children, adopted adults, secretaries, other dependents and slaves of various ages.
“The Romans rarely used it to mean family in the sense of kin” (4) writes Roman Family historian Suzane Dixon. Evidently, the word family can have different definitions, depending on the geographic era and the time. However, members of families, either biological or chosen, all throughout history have been exposed or subjected to neglect, abuse and violence. Unfortunately the difference between a healthy and a dysfunctional family can be unclear sometimes, as the boundary may seem too ambiguous when the words abuse and discipline are used erroneously.
A family dysfunction can be any condition that impedes its proper rhythm. Most families have some periods of time when functioning is impaired by stressful circumstances, for instance: death, illness, unemployment, finances, stress, work, school, etc. Moreover, healthy families tend to return to normal functioning after the crisis passes. In dysfunctional families, however, problems tend to be chronic.
A healthy family is not perfect; there may be misunderstandings, tensions, conflicts, yelling, hurt and anger, but not always. Emotional expression is allowed; and it’s acceptable to get mad sometimes, as long as it’s not all the time. The Holy Bible teaches on Ephesians 4-23 “Be ye angry and sin not, let not the sun go down upon your wrath”. (5) Also, in a healthy family, rules tend to be explicit and are consistent, but with some flexibility to adapt to individual needs and particular situations. Ephesians 6-4 exemplifies this idea with the following verse: “And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath”. (6)
Children are treated with respect, and do not fear emotional, verbal, physical, or sexual abuse. On the contrary, they feel safe, as they know that their parents are there to protect them and to look after their well being. These children are given responsibilities appropriate to their age and are not expected to fulfill parental roles. In healthy families everyone makes mistakes; mistakes are allowed as perfection is impossible and unrealistic.
There are many types of dysfunctions in families. Some parents under-function, leaving their children to thrive for themselves. Other parents over-function, never allowing them to grow up and be on their own. Below is a brief description of some types of parental dysfunction, along with some common problems associated with each according to the Book, Psychiatric Mental Health Nursing by Katherine Fortinash and Patricia Holoday Worret (7)
Alcoholic families tend to be chaotic and unpredictable.(8) Such is the example of Christina Crawford, the adopted daughter of famous actress Joan Crawford. In her book “Mommie Dearest” (9) she claims to be a victim of child abuse during her mother’s battle with alcoholism. Christina recounts several evenings where Joan's conduct was disturbed and recalls at least one encounter with her mother where Crawford attempted to strangle her. Therefore, being a member of this kind of family is usually very unsafe, for instance rules that apply one day don't apply the next. Expectations vary from one day to the next. Parents may be harsh at times and indifferent at others. In addition, emotional expression is frequently forbidden and discussion about the alcohol use or related family problems is likely to be prohibited as well. All of these factors leave children feeling insecure, frustrated, and angry. Usually, children of alcoholics are at a higher risk for becoming alcoholics than are children of non-alcoholics.

Abuse can be verbal, physical, or sexual. Verbal abuse, such as frequent denigration can have long-lasting effects, particularly when it comes from those commended to the child's care. Criticism can be aimed at the child's looks, intelligence, capabilities, or basic value. Some verbal abusers are very direct, while others use subtle put downs masked as humor. Both types are damaging for the kid’s self-confidence.
Many parents, at one time or another, have felt the urge to strike their children. However, with physically abusive parents, the urge is common and very little effort is made to control this impulse. The Federal Child Abuse Prevention and Treatment Act defines physical abuse as "the infliction of physical injuries such as bruises, burns, welts, cuts, bone or skull fractures; these are caused by kicking, punching, biting, beating, knifing, strapping, paddling, etc." (10).Unfortunately, there have been many cases in which newborns and small babies have had severe brain damage as consequence of abusive parents. Baby shaken syndrome, according to the Pediatric Medical encyclopedia is: “When an infant or toddler is shaken, the brain bounces back and forth against the skull. This can cause bruising of the brain (cerebral contusion), swelling, pressure, and bleeding in the brain. The large veins along the outside of the brain may tear, leading to further bleeding, swelling, and increased pressure. This can easily cause permanent brain damage or death.”(11)
Abusing a child merely fulfills the parent's emotional needs and is usually less concerned about the child. Parents often erroneously justify abuse as discipline, alleging that it is intended to help the child. Physically abusive parents can create an environment of horror for the child, particularly since violence is often arbitrary and unpredictable. Children of abusive parents have tremendous difficulties developing feelings of trust and safety, even in their adult lives.
While parents may justify or rationalize verbal or physical abuse as discipline intended to somehow help the child, there is no justification for sexual abuse. Sexual abuse is the most purposeful example of an adult abusing a child purely for that adult's own gratification. Sexual abuse happens to both boys and girls. It occurs in all social levels, races, educational levels, and religious affiliations. In most cases, sexual abuse is part of a family pattern of an already seen but undetected dysfunction. Responsibility for sexual abuse in all cases rests entirely with the adult. No child is ever responsible for being sexually abused. Most sexually abused children are too scared of the consequences for themselves and their families to risk telling another adult what is happening. Consequently, they grow into adulthood holding feelings of shame, and worthlessness. They tend to be self-punishing and have considerable difficulties with relationships and with sexuality in their adulthood.
Regardless of the kind of abuse, there are factors that contribute to these patterns of dysfunction such as: poverty, use if illegal drugs, alcoholism, lack of education, engaging in sexual activity at a young age, and for this reason single-parenting. In the book “The Audacity of Hope” (12) Obama suggests that women who “engage in sex at an early age, without the proper reverence toward intimacy and sex don’t understand the value of commitment and sacrifices that marriage entails”,(Obama, 336). Therefore, being more prone to becoming single mothers and dragging their children to become part of the statistics that he mentions mentions: “Children in single-parent homes are also more likely to drop out of school and become teen parents, even when income is factored out” (Obama, 333)
While there are certainly genetic and biological factors involved in the development of an adolescent's propensity towards committing crimes, family dysfunction also plays a key role in this arena. Young people from problematic backgrounds or especially difficult circumstances are not only more likely to participate in criminal activities. According to a study conducted by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), adolescents with emotional and behavioral problems are more likely to abuse alcohol and illicit drugs. (13) The study also revealed that adolescents who have tendencies toward substance abuse admitted to delinquent behaviors such as stealing, chronic absenteeism in school and hanging out with a bad influences. SAMHSA also reported that in general, these teens have poor peer and parental relationships, as well as trouble concentrating in school, or focusing attention on tasks involved in every aspect of their lives.(14)
The scars left from being raised in a dysfunctional family that lead a child to commit crimes can be healed as long as those concerned are willing to face the problem and work to overcome it. Unfortunately if the pillar and ground of a kid is abusive and dysfunctional the kid will grow with the same and even more and worst deficiencies. Fortunately, contributing factors are being revealed and it’s our task to prevent these dysfunctions to occur in our families and therefore in our societies.