From Flight to Fight An uncompassionate stepmother, dead father, and hostile living conditions in an unusual city were all things Gus Lee faced upon arriving to the complex city of San Francisco. Understandingly, Lee felt very small in this place and lacked the confidence necessary to live in such a metropolitan environment. Lee often felt inferior to those around him and refused to fight other boys in the neighborhood, for he believed he did not have the essential skills or strength. Fortunately, Lee later became a very successful writer and ethicist because of his life experiences as a child living in the big city of opportunity. Although he faced many hardships, Gus Lee was supported by motivational people and gained enough strength to rise above these setbacks as well as to have a reason to write. As a young boy, Lee acquired little to no self-esteem when he compared himself to others and recognized his lack of superiority. He even stated that, “[b]y the time [he] was in the second grade and in the center of the frying pan, [he] was the only Asian, the only nonblack and the only certified no-question-about-it nonfighter in the district” (150). Because Lee refused to be the fighting type, he felt even more vulnerable in his environment as well as his community. He also felt as if he were the smallest fish in one of the biggest ponds he had come across of in his life lacking a connection to others, as he had a different culture and appearance than everyone he usually came across. Lee even goes as far to say that, “[his] courage was so low that putting on his big-boy underpants was a task” (154). In the way that Lee did not have the confidence to perform and act in bigger aspects in his life, the smaller actions also became affected because to Lee they were to be done with determination and concentration such as even putting on underpants. Also, because of the fact that they were “big-boy underpants”, Lee felt as if he could not fit them. He believed he was much too small to fit anything that was for a bigger boy; thus, it was awkward for him to try to somehow make them work for him. After becoming familiar with the community, Lee met the compassionate Toussaint who willingly assisted Lee during his time of uncertainty. Lee explains how “[his] primary bond to [Toussaint] was for things he did not do. He never cut [Lee] down” and “he opened his heart by explaining things to [Lee], giving [Lee] his learning, and taking [him] into his own home” (152). Toussaint provided Lee with someone to look up to for guidance, protection, and friendship, things that Lee lacked in his town earlier. Because of this inspirational person, Lee had a longing to somehow be like him and to gain the confidence that so easily came to his friend. Essentially, Lee reflected this self-worth and pride later on as he became a talented writer and he effortlessly was able to express his emotions. He also taught his skills in ethics to members of the U.S. Military, which he would not have gained if he never had gone through times of lacking assurance and a confident attitude. With this, he could relate to those who were going through similar circumstances and better assist them just as Toussaint did for him. Lee slowly began to acquire strength through his actions and in turn rebelled against his usual way of thinking of himself. He stated how “[he] began to imagine [him]self as a fighter. Who did good for others and beat the crap out of bad guys” and in his cartoon sequences “[he] was unconquerable” (167). By developing this kind of passion for fighting, Lee reveals that although he had not found strength in his own self, he still longed for it. This kind of fight also represented how Lee had to go against what he was accustomed to in order to gain the victory of a new beneficial change in his life. He wanted to become more than the person he thought he was, and to be that strong, secure man; but he did not know how to find it in within. This longing turned into reality when after running away from home in the dark of night, he explains how “[he] returned with small steps to the house of [his] stepmother” (167). Lee only returned because he believed he had the strength enough to do so and face the difficult, distressful life at home. He confronted his hardships head-on, and by believing in himself, he had finally found the confidence he was so eager to withhold. It was this kind of courage that he later utilized and directed toward his life as a writer. It was how he was able to teach ethics with even more knowledge after living in such a diverse place and experiencing these situations in his life. Although it took Lee some time, he eventually gained the strength he so hungered and was desperate for. He was able to do this by being above all he struggled with. Additionally, he achieved this through the assistance of his benevolent friend, and the crucial events he faced. Without these, Gus Lee may have never progressed into the skillful writer nor develop such a talent for ethics. Both of these positive characteristics were beneficial and Lee continues to inspire others even to this day. The man who was once a follower, became a leader of many as he believes courage is the backbone of leadership.

Works Cited:

Lee, Gus. "Fighting and friendship in the Panhandle." San Francisco childhood: memories of a great city seen through the eyes of its children. John van der Zee ed. Kensington, Calif.: Grizzly Peak Press, 2011. 150-167. Print.

"Gus Lee Integrenómics." Gus Lee Integrenómics. N.p., n.d. Web. 18 July 2012. <http://www.guslee.net/>.