...We all know love. We have all loved in some kind of way. We love our parents, significant others and even our friends. But we can also love other things like animals or material things. But what is the difference between loving and liking? And is it better not to love and feel pain or to love and be hurt in the progress? Jonathan Franzen seeks to answer these questions in his essay “Liking Is for Cowards. Go for What Hurts”. The essay “Liking Is for Cowards. Go for What Hurts” is, as mentioned, written by Jonathan Franzen and published in The New York Times, May 28, 2011. Jonathan Franzen is born in 1959, and he is an acclaimed American novelist and essayist. The essay is based on the commencement speech he delivered at Kenyon College in Ohio, USA. “Our technology has become extremely adept in creating products that correspond to our fantasy ideal of an erotic relationship, in which the beloved object asks for nothing and gives everything, instantly. (…)” As Franzen claims in his essay, many people can feel like they love their technological object. It gives them a satisfaction, which human interaction maybe wouldn’t. Franzen however thinks, that people in general don’t love material things: they like them. There is a major difference between loving and liking – even though it might appear small. “Liking, in general, is commercial culture’s substitute for loving.” Products are made to be likeable, but if that concept in transferred to a person, you would instantly see...
Words: 1039 - Pages: 5
...essayist, wrote the essay “Liking is for cowards. Go for what hurts” in The New York Times in 2011. Franzen’s essay is mainly about the increasing relationship between humans and technology, where he criticizes the development of the narcissism in the modern time. He writes about how to love and like in real life and in consumer technology. Franzen begins the essay with his own example of his relationship to his old smartphone and his new one. He describes his own addiction to the new Blackberry and he “wanted to keep fondling” the new blackberry even though he didn’t have anybody to reach. He finds safety in the smartphone because it won´t hurt you and it’s always available and writes that the “beloved object asks for nothing and gives everything, instantly, and makes us feel powerful, and doesn’t throw terrible scenes when it’s replaced by an even sexier object.” ll.49-53. Franzen describes therefore his blackberry as a girlfriend. But vanity has become more popular these days and the term “liking “ someone’s picture or status on Facebook is stated as “commercial culture’s substitute for loving” (ll.84-84), and is a superficial way of saying that you “like” the person. Franzen writes that we can form our own lives through the media and make it more interesting for others to see and he blames it because of its increasing narcissism and the fakeness of “liking”. But as I mentioned before, this term can be compared to the love/addiction to a smartphone. In real life you could get hurt...
Words: 1004 - Pages: 5
...Analysis of Bacon’s essay ‘OF LOVE’ In this essay, “Of Love” Bacon tries to alter reader’s understanding by pointing out the shortcomings of love by focuses his attention on three points: Love is entertaining only on stage, it is an exaggerated form of expression in literature and wisdom and love wouldn’t coexist. He starts his essay by plunging direct into the crux of his argument which is confined in a short sentence, “The stage is more beholding of Love, than the real life of man.” He in the next line articulates the Aristotelian classification of stage i.e. tragedy and comedy. He believes that only plays are capable of portraying love that is pure and gives joy while in reality love is digressive, deluding and impish in nature like siren who deluded Odysseus on his voyage to home. He strengthens his argument by the dichotomous nature of Marcus Antony and Appius Claudius, where the former became the victim and the latter was the victor of this passion because, “love can find entrance not only into an open heart, but also a heart well fortified, if watch be not well kept." Bacon’s notion can be treated as a perception not as a rule to sentry emotions. According to him, Marcus Antonius, cohort of Appius Cladius, who was an “Austere and wise man”, was infiltrated by an astute passion because his “watch was not well kept”. Bacon is convinced that “Great spirits and great business do keep this weak passion”. But may we infer that Antonius was a "greater" man than Claudius because...
Words: 1241 - Pages: 5
...Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter etc. Many people measure their popularity and look solely on how many “likes” and positive comments they attract on these media sites. Especially a lot of the young people who grow up in a world, where they see this phenomenon as completely normal, even though it’s far from the real one. “Liking Is for Cowards. Go for What Hurts” is an essay by Jonathan Franzen, an acclaimed American novelist and essayist. The essay is based on his speech at Kenyon College, Ohio, USA, and was published in The New York Times, May 28, 2011. Whit this essay Franzen tries to remind people of the true meaning of love and not being so terrified of rejection. Even though technology might be at its peak and has features “Like a magician’s incantations” (p. 1. L. 38). Besides the newest technology including fancy gadgets, materialism in general seems to be taking over the entire western world. According to Franzen you don’t show love to another person by showing interest in their life and have regular conversations. Not even the words “I love you”, measure up to actually receiving something material. “… if you love somebody you should by stuff” (p. 2. Ll. 76-77). However there is one thing that in today’s society battles out even giving or receiving material things: the “like” you give, or receive, while sitting in front of your computer or being on your smartphone. People are willing to change who they really are in order to achieve “likes”. They create a person online which...
Words: 992 - Pages: 4
...Liking Is for Cowards. Go for What Hurts Essay The world we are living in has been through so many changes, and now we are living in a world filled with technology. It is not just some inconsiderable change in our everyday life, and it would not be an exaggeration if you said that technology has changed the world. It has dispensed so many new opportunities to the human kind and it is just the beginning of what technology may bring the future. One could argue whether technology has had negative or positive influence on the human kind, and you can ask yourselves whether people are using technology in a meaningful way? Maybe the human race is not clever enough to avoid being seduced by technology. The essay Liking Is for Cowards. Go for What Hurts written by Jonathan Franzen bring some essential subjects into focus. In the beginning of the essay he describes his obsession with his new BlackBerry Bold and why he got rid of the old one. He humanizes his phones and describes his relationship with them as if the phones were actual people. He says: “(…) our technology has become extremely adept at creating products that correspond to our fantasy ideal of an erotic relationship (…)” (p. 8, l. 46) He explains that the ultimate goal of technology is to replace the natural world with a world that is responsive to our wishes. Technology does not ask for anything, we can do what ever we want with it without getting into a big argument as in ‘real’ relationships, and all things considered...
Words: 1172 - Pages: 5
...B- Liking Is for Cowards. Go for What Hurts ” Write an essay in which you analyse and comment on Jonathan Franzen´s essay ” Liking Is for Cowards. Go for What Hurts”. Part of your essay must focus on how Jonathan Franzen tries to engage a young audience and on the message of the essay. The essay “Liking Is for Corwards. Go for What Hurts is written by the American writer Jonathan Franzen. The essay was published in The New York Times on may 28th, 2011 and is based on a speech by Franzen at Kenyon College in Ohio. Since the development of technology, the world is built up on mobile phones , text messages, Facebook and “likes”. What does the word “like” really mean to us? People like pictures, marital status and status in general on Facebook. Do they really like it or do they go with the flow? And what is the difference between like or real love? Jonathan Franzen debates the two images of loving and liking and how technology might have influenced us to change our point of view.First of all he starts telling the reader about his new Blackberry, which is an prior version of the Blackberry generation. His description of his own phone is great in details and the reader gets the impression of the miscellaneousness of the phone.The fantastic fact about such a mobile phone is that “ the beloved object asks for nothing and gives everything, instantly, and makes us feel all powerful, and doesn´t throw terrible scenes when it´s replaced by an even sexier object”. It might mean...
Words: 688 - Pages: 3
...if it catches my attention or not. Stories have to get me involved with the story somehow in order for me to get interest. If it’s not catching my attention, I’m not reading it. But most importantly, critical thinking is what ties reading and writing together. I am very picky about the books and articles I read. Stories for me have to have a mystery or even sometimes a sappy love story. Of course I’m going to love romantic books because I’m a girl, right? Yet again, some love stories bore the living hell out of me because it’s a “typical” love story. Reading books just all depends on how the author grabs his reader’s attention and how he plays the story throughout the book. When I find a book that I’m interested in, I will read the entire novel. Or even something that is scary will keep hooked on the story. Scary stories are my favorites because the story just keeps my suspense in play. Celebrity gossip is definitely something that I get into reading. There is always something new with these celebrities. Since these celebrities are well known, their lives are somehow interesting to us. We love the celebrity gossip because they’re famous and any juicy story about a celebrity will catch our attention. The writers of these magazine articles know how to grab my attention. It’s almost like they just suck all your attention into the story to where your face is only an inch from touching the magazine. In order for these writers to...
Words: 1630 - Pages: 7
...”Liking Is for Cowards. Go for What Hurts” Focus points: congruence and working in quotes All over the world, the media is becoming a dominating part of people's everyday life. Pages such as Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat and so on are affecting the society. We replace the bad things in life with technology, and we do not realize it before there's nothing else left. The kids who grow up in this world are so easily affected. The media raise them. They're raised by the idea that likes and comments are the definition of their popularity and how likeable they are. This is also some of the topics Jonathan Franzen talks about in his essay: "Liking Is for Cowards. Go for What Hurts". In the essay by Jonathan Franzen, he passes through a lot of topics. He's very critical towards the technology, which has developed aggressively throughout the last couple of years. He uses a lot of experiences from his own life such as when he talks about his new Blackberry (s. 1, line 1-4). He also talks about how we all want to be likeable. We all want to be accepted and liked by everyone. But it is just not possible. We use the technology to hide behind. The world of liking becomes dominant and that takes out the meaning of loving someone. Because when you love someone, then you expose yourself, which makes you vulnerable. So we hide on the social medias. We do not expose ourselves, but we can portray ourselves just as we like on the media. No one needs to know all the bad stuff. ...
Words: 1166 - Pages: 5
...March 31st, 2014 In Favor of Love Laura Kipnis, in her essay Against love, touches many aspects of love. It is a sensitive topic simply because love brings out many different opinions and beliefs. The author argues the fact that in order to have a good relationship and love we need to meet creating requirements like good communication, coherence and close relationship or intimacy. It is an interesting essay. What quite caught my attention is that at the beginning of the essay, the author says “Love is, as we know, a mysterious and controlling force. It has vast power over our thoughts and life decisions. It demands our loyalty, and we, in turn, freely comply. (Kipnis 734). This is the simplest way to explain what love is about. When people realize that you really love someone we do and say things you never imagine. Love is an important part of life. Life without love is like an ocean without water. Love is not something you find on the streets or stumble on. It grows on you with time. On the essay, the author, also refers about passion. “Of course, the parties involved must work at keeping passion alive ….. (Kipnis 736). Passion can be described in two words: strong and uncontrollable. We can’t control how we feel about the people, activities and ideas in our lives. Passion unfortunately is not always a good thing especially it can make a person incompetent. Everyone has a passion of their own and their pursue it in different ways. Love can and will make you feel as...
Words: 559 - Pages: 3
...In On Going Home, Didion tackles themes such as belonging, family and home by telling the story of a time when, without her husband, she took her daughter “home” to celebrate her first birthday to the hometown where Didion grew up in the house where she lived with her mother and premarital family. The essay deals with Didion’s personal issues as she compares and contrasts her current life with her husband and their child versus her life and experiences growing up. The essay speaks to the internal conflict many of us feel as adults once we leave the nest, so to speak, and go out into the world to find new “homes” while always looking back to our pasts. I felt connected to this piece and that connection inspired me to want to dive deeper. This essay spoke to me on various levels but the main reason why I chose it is because I could see myself in it. Both as a mother of a young child and as a married woman who has chosen to live far from “home,” I felt connected to this piece and to Didion as its writer. I have traveled with my daughter, now age four, back to visit my family in Philadelphia numerous times since she was born. When we lived in New York, I made the drive three to four times per year and now that I live in Iowa, the frequency has diminished to an annual flight but she and I still find ourselves making the trip without my husband, due to his work schedule. Our recent two lectures discussed the importance of “place” and its meaning in our writing. Unit One discussed...
Words: 1935 - Pages: 8
...through old pictures and junk. She is starting to get bored and missing her life in L.A. Her family still thinks of her as a child. The mother cannot giver daughter the same sense of home and family because of her disconnection. This essay spoke to me on various levels but the main reason why I chose it is because I could see myself in it. As a married woman who has chosen to live far from “home,” I felt connected to this piece and to Didion. In “On Going Home” Didion uses place in both ways. She discusses her childhood home, in the Central Valley of California, the specific place where she grew up and where her mother resides, and as she shares her memories and experiences with the location itself, she also gives up insight into her history, culture, what her family is/was like and how that place affected and still affects her emotionally and how it compares to the home she’s made with her husband and daughter in Los Angeles. Writing about place challenges us to rethink the way in which we view our own place—what we take for granted, how we choose to define ourselves, and what we mean to others.” Didion’s essay had a profound effect on me. It caused me to reflect on my own life and to think about where I came from, where I am now and where I’m going. I’ve lived in various places and have considered each one my “home” at one time or another. Although Didion was talking about her own life, I felt as though she might as well have been talking about me and mine even...
Words: 1678 - Pages: 7
...poet and move to Ireland. Jed didn’t realize that the fact that he didn’t care about anything would be the reason why he later in his life would live a gray and sad life with no wife and just a dog. The mother thinks of her self as a gray and doll person who doesn’t has a good life. That image of her self comes because she cant move on from the feeling of being in love with the cool boy and have the attention from others. After she starts to chat with Jad, she realizes that she actually has a normal and good life, compered to Jed who haven’t maked anything out of him self, and have droved his wife on the edge of insanity and now he is trying to find purpose with his life by going back to something he could care about years ago. Jed is trying to act cool behind the computer, but is really sad and miserable. When the mother sees that, she realizes that if she goes back to him she just ends up with a life there actually is gray and doll. After that she know that she has a good and descent life, compered to him. And that lifts her up from the darkness she is living in. The theme or themes in this essay is romance and self-realization, and coming to terms with who you are. You can see how the mother is realizing that she HAVE a good life and she HAVE found love, because if she hadn’t found love she wouldn’t have a child and a husband. In the essay Appleyard is trying to say that if you are trying to hang too much in the past you will never move forward and you will never see...
Words: 472 - Pages: 2
...massive technological trend. Liking Is for Cowards. Go for What Hurts, is an essay written by Jonathan Franzen, that is based on a commencement speech he delivered at Kenyon College, Ohio, USA. Jonathan Franzen tries to remind people of the true meaning of love, even though technology is being at its peak. He is also trying to reach out to the young audience and tell them, that a real life isn’t on the Internet, but in real life. The author in this essay puts or daily routine on the Internet into perspective and tries to force us to be critical about what we do online. The author stars out sharing a personal experience, which is getting a new smartphone, and he is using it, as a starting point for his concerns. Jonathan Franzen is aware of the danger of scaring all those young readers who might be fed up with some older people, who are complaining about today’s generation of technological and Internet users: “Very probably, you’re sick to death of hearing social media disrespected by cranky 51-year-olds”. Therefore he catches the young audiences attention by comparing the relationship he have with his smartphone to a relationship of romantic nature. Our author seeks to keep in eye level with the young readers, by using familiar expressions like “outgrown the relationship”, “trust issues” and so on. He chooses to contrast the natural world with the new technological world. Jonathan Franzen talks of love as the...
Words: 904 - Pages: 4
...loyal, connection, and sympathy. No matter in what form is it being given, as long as the other person understands they are sending their love. For a few, unfortunately, don’t get the love and connection needed. The bond creates sensations in order to cause feelings of strength and protection. For example, a bond between a father and son, both considered males, which portrays them to play a strong, manly role and a bond which doesn’t involve much emotional connections but further of a competitive bond such as engaging in sports related activity. Simply on an account of men not relying on demonstrating emotional feelings for one another, only when necessary....
Words: 867 - Pages: 4
...My Little Bit of Country Every unique human-living person has its own dreams and perspectives of life. Someone prefers to live in the urban areas with tall buildings, lots of people and a flow of bustle in the streets. Others have a distinct preference for the suburban life; being in the wild nature with a small society. These differences between the species of lifestyles can be sizeable but you cannot say which one is the best. Every lifestyle has its own pros and cons. In “My Little Bit of Country”, 2012 by Susan Cheever, Cheever prefers to live in New York – Central Park is her favorite place to be. In Central Park she feels safe. Cheever is the narrator but also the main character in the essay. We have a first person narrator, but it is a subjective essay, since it is a summary of Cheever’s life and we only hear about what she longs for. The essay is chronological, because Cheever starts telling about her first memories of life – she is in Central Park with her father in the summer mornings and sometimes they visit the Central Park Zoo. Then she keeps on going telling about why she loves the city but that she is the only one, because her family rather to have a place in the countryside. She grows up in Westchester but as often as possible, she visits the Central Park. At the time when she gets her own children she “vowed to let them grew up in the city and never, ever transplant them to the country.” Her desire is to live in New York near the Central Park and she...
Words: 1005 - Pages: 5
