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Where Are You Going Where Have You Been Coming Of Age Essay

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Growing up in modern society is always difficult and can sometimes even be dangerous. The process of coming of age, of maturing, can be the most confusing stage of this process. It is a stage where guidance from others can be insufficient or unwanted. Adult concepts are explored when the mind is not that of an adult's. This misalignment causes many difficulties but is also necessary to becoming an adult. Joyce Carol Oats illustrates the theme of the difficulty and danger of coming of age in "Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been." Connie's sexually mature adult persona is shown to be just a mask when she is pursued by Arnold. Connie wishes to be viewed as an independent woman and enjoys the attention she gets from boys. This is evident …show more content…
Connie is very insecure about her appearance, this is illustrated by her “checking other people’s faces to make sure her own was all right.”(Oates 506). She needs to be reassured that she is pretty to function in the world and act confident. Her mother’s constant judgment only increases Connie’s insecurity. It reaches a point where Connie “wished her mother was dead and she herself was dead and it was all over”(Oates 506). In her melodramatic mind death would be better than having to deal with her mother picking at her insecurities. These feelings also lead her to seek validation through attention she gets from boys.
The complexities and struggles of growing up in modern society are evident in Joyce Carol Oats short story “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been”. Connie’s experiences show the desire to develop an adult persona and the issues that can cause. The relationship between her and her mother shows the difficulty a lack of understanding and support can cause in this transition period. Connie also expresses the struggles many young people experience with insecurity and low self esteem. Her story is 50 years old this year, has society done enough to help deal with these

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