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Save as Many as You Ruin

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Save as Many as You Ruin

Sometime in a lifetime people make mistakes. This can be mistakes that are impossible to save and mistakes that can get absolutely crucial for the rest of your life. If you believe in God or faith, you might also believe that faith or God might reach out a hand to help you when no one else stopped believing you. It is in moments like these where it is important to remember, that you can always try saving something that you previously ruined.

Gerard is the main character is the story and he is a handsome man living in New York with his eight-year old daughter. Gerard loves his daughter, Lucy. She is his light of the day and there are several times in the story where he mentions how much she means to him. “Gerard feels a stabbing love for his daughter” (line 18), “She’s wonderful, just wonderful” (line 78) and “I love you” (line 165). Apart from Lucy Gerard lives a relatively boring and uninteresting life. The only thing we, as readers hear about is his love for his daughter and the women there have been in his life. We are never told what kind of job he has, or where he grew up and anything about his parents or friends he might or might not have in his life.
A turning point for Gerard in the story is when he meets Laurel by a coincident though a window. At this time Gerard and Laurel are former partners and Gerard haven’t seen Laurel for years. Laurel is the only woman Gerard ever loved, but in spite of that she is not Lucy’s mother. Gerard met Laurel for the first time before he met Lucy’s mother. Short time after he met and felt in love with Laurel he meets Issy, Lucy’s mother. As the same time as he was in love with Laurel, he kept thinking that Issy was an incredible lover and it was first when Issy told Gerard that she was pregnant, he decided to end things with Laurel. Short time after Lucy was born Issy moved to Los Angeles to be a professional actress and Gerard were left behind alone with his daughter. Four years after Issy left to LA she was found dead in a pool with Gerard’s name as her next of kin. In the time between Issy’s dead and meeting Laurel again after eight years Gerard are seeing many women. He has slept with many women and most of them knew that he would never fall in love with them, so they didn’t even try getting him to. So they kept a distance and spared them selves the pain it would give them.

By looking between the lines in the story it is a concluding fact that Gerard doesn’t think of his life as a special one. He doesn’t think of him self like he is special or one of a kind. Actually we get the impression that he is unimportant and that no one cares about him. This is based on his description and perception of his footprints and breath. In line 7 it says: ”Gerard thinks of his own footprints and how soon they will disappear. He exhales into the world and his breath disappears”. This is telling us about his perception of him self and that he doesn’t think that he is going to leave any change for anyone.

In the first part of the story, before Gerard meets Laurel he is filled with a sad and depressing mood. It is snowing outside and he is telling us, that he is walking alone in the streets, thinking about his existence, strange things like “Manhattan was once I forest” (line 4), and everyone’s footprints in the snow. Exception to his sad mood he always has Lucy to bring back the smile on his face. Actually it could work as a contrast to love and positive feelings later on in the story, after Gerard met Laurel again. Generally in this story there is a few contrasts. At first we have Laurel and Issy. Laurel is this romantic woman Gerard is so in love with and shares so much passion with and on the other site Issy who is the perfect sex-partner he desire to be with. The second contrast in this story is Lucy and her mother. Gerard tells in the story that Issy lied a lot and unlike that Lucy who can see by the very same moment when her father is telling I lie.

There is a symbol witch is seen although the story and that is water. It could seem like water is some kind of connected to Gerard and his feelings. In the end he feels like someone or something has poured cold water down his neck (line 198) and later on it is explained, where he is wondering if he did the right thing with Laurel back when they first met. When he gets home and stands in his office he is recreating the moment he saw her in the shop and then he lets the memory spill over like a faucet left running (line 61). Here we have the water again which can be used as a key to the water, grounded by the fact that nearly every time he thinks on Issy or Laurel, some kind of water comes into the story. When he thinks on Laurel there comes water down his neck.
At this moment it’s like God or faith comes into the picture again. It is like he or it wants to give Gerard a new chance with Laurel even though he ruined both of their lives once.

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